The Invader Zim Singing Challenge!
by Invader Phoenix
Summary: The cast of Invader Zim have been force- I mean volunteered to compete in a series of singing duels. Who will come out on top? Will everyone survive? Will rainbow tacos fall from the sky? READ AND FIND OUT, PEOPLE! Contains OCs.
1. GIR vs Dib

**Sorry this isn't in script format, but script format isn't allowed on the site. I'm sorry, you won't get to vote on a winner because fan participation also isn't allowed. But you can still review and tell me who you think should have won for each chapter. Maybe I can incorporate that into the story later on. Anyways, I own NONE of the copyrighted songs in this fic, so do not sue me, people.**

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><p><strong>Alright, this AN I'm adding several months after the publication of this story. It has been requested that I take out the copyrighted song lyrics used in order to comply with the rules of the site. After chapter 20, the competition songs are mainly written by myself. In theses first 20 chapters, I will give the title and the artist of the song. You can listen to the song via Youtube if you like. Sorry for any inconvieniences. I OWN NOTHING! Please enjoy. :)<strong>

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><p>Gen walks onto a stage. "Hello, and welcome to the INVADER ZIM KARAOKE CHALLENGE!" she says. She walks backstage for a moment and pulls out Tsuki. "Say your line!" she hisses.<p>

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Whatever. We're your hosts, Tsuki and Gen. And here are the rest of our contestants: Zim. Dib, GIR, Gaz, Tak, and the Tallest."

The Invader Zim cast looks at the girls like they're insane. "WHY DID YOU BRING US HERE?" Dib asks, freaking out.

Gen smiles. "This is a singing competition. Each chapter, two contestants or two groups of contestants will each perform a song. Then, based on your performance, we'll decide a winner for each chapter!" She smiles.

"Hey, we're taller than all of you! We should be the ones calling the shots!" Purple says angrily.

"I will destroy you all." Gaz says.

"I'm actually interested," Tak says. "I want to see everyone embarrass themselves for everyone on the internet to see."

Tsuki looks around the room. "We're doing this," she says bluntly.

Zim looks up and screams, "NO ONE WANTS TO PLAY YOUR FILTHY GAME OF… FILTH SINGING!"

Tsuki raises her fist. "Actually, our first contestant tonight is a VOLUNTEER, you idiot."

GIR runs up on stage with a microphone.

"GIR! WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE? COME DOWN THIS INSTRANT! I COMMAND YOOOOOOOUUUU!" Zim yells, but he is silenced by Tsuki's loud shout of "SHUT UP!" in his ear.

Gen starts the music and GIR begins to sing.

{GIR SINGS "Tik Tok" BY Ke$ha}

GIR puts down the microphone and laughs.

Gen and Tsuki stand and applaud, while everyone else looks in horror at what they're about to do.

Gen turns to them. "See? It's not that hard. You go up, sing, and then after both contestants have gone, we all vote and decide on a winner. Now, anyone else want to try? Or do we have to pick?"

No one raises their hand.

Tsuki stands. "If no one volunteers and we pick you, you have to go. And if you're difficult, we'll pick the song, and I don't think anyone wants to sing 'Elmo's Song'."

Everyone raises their hand.

Tsuki scans the group for just the right person to torture. "Dib," she says.

Gen hands Dib the mic as he takes the stage. "Uh, so, what do I do again?"

"SING A SONG!" Gen screams.

Dib swallows nervously as Gen starts the music.

{DIB SINGS "Let the Flames Begin" by Paramore}

Tsuki runs up onto the stage with anger as Zim boos like there's no tomorrow. "HOW DARE YOU SING PARAMORE! I WILL NOT HAVE MY FAVORITE BAND'S WORK BE WASTED ON YOU!"

Gen grabs her shoulders. "PULL! YOUR! SELF! TOGETHER! It's just a song, Tsuki. You'll survive. Besides, it's time to vote!"

Tsuki begrudgingly turns to the cast. "Now, here's how this works. We each vote once. Then we'll tally the votes and announce this chapter's winner. Okay?"

Everyone votes.

Gen smiles. "Tonight the winner will be announced by… Lard Nar!"

Tsuki looks at her. "Why on earth would you choose…"

Lard Nar steps onto the stage holding an alien cell phone. He opens it up to his text messages.

Gen whispers to Tsuki, "Uh, why is he checking his phone?"

"I texted him the winner," Tsuki replies.

"Seriously, Tsuki? You text for everything!" Suddenly Gen's phone vibrated. She opened it and read her new text message. "'I deny that.'"

Lard Nar cleared his throat. "Ahem. Okay, tonight's contestants were GIR singing his own version of Ke$ha's 'Tik Tok' and Dib singing 'Let the Flames Begin' by Paramore. This chapter's winner is… GIR!"

"YAAAAAY! THE PEOPLES LIKE MEEEE!" Gir shouts with joy as he jumps onto the stage.

Dib looks around. "Did anyone vote for me?"

Tsuki glares at him. "You didn't stand a chance."

"Why not?"

"BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES YOU!"

Gen stepped between them. "Okay, uh, that's all the time we have! We'll see you next chapter for our next face-off!"


	2. Tak vs Zim

Tsuki walks onto the stage. "Hello, and welcome to episode two of the Invader Zim Singing Challenge. As you all know, my co-host Gen allowed Dib to sing the Paramore song 'Let the Flames Begin' last time. I love Paramore and feel that Dib should not sing anything I like. Therefore, I will be punishing Gen this chapter by telling you, the readers, all of her secrets."

Gen bursts onstage. She is panicked. "WHAT?"

"When Gen was in sixth grade, we ran a balloon pop race and Gen ended up bouncing on the chair with over 200 people watching because she couldn't pop the balloon."

"TSUKI!" Gen shouts. She turns to the audience. "Ignore everything she says to you!"

"Gen also got freaked out and hid under her bed for three hours when she turned on the TV and saw the _funny_ part of 'Jurassic Park'."

"HE GOT EATEN WHILE HE WAS ON THE TOILET!" Gen shrieks. "And besides, don't we have a show to run?"

The Tallest walk onstage. "Yes, you do." Red says irritably.

"Yeah, we don't want to be here any longer than we have to!" Purple adds.

Tsuki laughs as Gen clears her throat. "_Anyway_, our duel tonight is between… ZIM AND TAK!"

A random person in the audience jumps up. "ZATR rocks!"

Gen throws water from the Cup of Punishment at them. "SILENCE! We have a show to do!"

"Gen can't watch scary movies or read horror novels because she can't take them and gets totally freaked out." Tsuki says.

"ANYWAY ON WITH THE SHOW! FIRST UP IS TAK!"

Tak steps on stage with the microphone. She clears her throat and begins.

**(_TAK SINGS "BETTER THAN REVENGE" BY TAYLOR SWIFT. REVENGE. OF COURSE.)_**

Everyone applauds as Tak takes a bow.

Tsuki smiles. "That was awesome, Tak. Great song choice, too!"

"MPH! MMPH!"

Everyone turns around to see Gen duct taped onto a stool. Her mouth is covered by tape.

Dib turns to Tsuki. "You duct taped her to a stool?"

"This way she won't resist when I reveal her embarrassing secrets to the world. By the way, she's never ridden a roller coaster with a loop in it because she's afraid she'll fly off and die." Tsuki says.

"MMMMMMMMPPPPHHHH!"

Gaz looks at the girl who is currently trying to rip her arms free. "Wimp."

Tsuki laughs. "She also got shoved into a locker by a group of six-year-olds earlier this year when she picked up a neighbor's kid from day care."

"MMMMMMMPH! MMMPH MMMPH MMMMMMMMMMPH!"

Tsuki was blinking back tears as she announced, "Our second act of the night will be Zim. BWAH HAHAHA!"

Zim takes the stage. "First I'd like to say that you all are pathetic fools, except for my Tallest and GIR, and I will destroy you."

(**ZIM SINGS "WE ARE THE CHAMPOINS BY QUEEN, REPLACING EVERY 'WE' WITH 'I.')**

"Wow," Dib said as he stares at his enemy, who is posing. "Egotistical much?"

"That's what you say, but you're not the champion," Zim replies.

"Well, I think it's time to vote," Tsuki says. "Everyone fill out a ballot."

Everyone votes. Tsuki walks to the center of the stage. "Tonight's special guest is… HATSUKI!"

A young girl with an anime t-shirt on comes onto the stage with a piece of paper. The audience applauds.

"Hatsuki is a friend of me and Gen," Tsuki says. "She's an aspiring anime artist. PLUS GEN HAS VEGGIETALES ON HER IPOD!" Tsuki turns to Hatsuki. "So, shall we review the performances?"

"Yes," Hatsuki says. "Tonight we've seen Tak sing 'Better than Revenge' by Taylor Swift and Zim sing his…um…own version of 'We are the Champions' by Queen. The votes are in, and tonight's winner is…TAK!"

Tak stands, walks to the stage, and bows. "In your stinkin' face, Zim!"

"WHAT? How could the mighty ZIM lose to… to… TAK?" Zim cries.

"Because she has more talent than you and yours was more of a comedy act," Tsuki says.

Then Gen races onto the stage with duct tape hanging from her clothes.

"Um, what happened to Gen?" Hatsuki asks.

But no one has any time to respond, for Gen begins to scream at the top of her lungs. "TSUKI ONCE DRANK TOO MUCH MOUNTAIN DEW, WENT ON A CAFFINE RUSH, AND CRASHED ON THE SIDEWALK OUTSIDE!"

Tsuki runs over to hit Gen, but the latter maneuvers away, still shouting. "ZIM HAS A CRUSH ON TAK AND ONCE SPENT THREE HOURS LOOKING AT PICTURES OF HER ON THE INTERNET!"

Tak slaps Zim in the face. "SHE LIES!" he shouts, but he fools no one.

"DIB HAS A STUFFED TEDDY BEAR NAMED SPARKLES THAT HE KEEPS UNDER HIS PILLOW!"

Dib runs over to the camera. "That's all the time we have for this episode! And, uh, Gen's lying!"

"NO I'M NOT!"

"GOODBYE AND THANKS FOR WATCHING!" Dib says.


	3. Tsuki vs Dib

**I'd just like to say that actress22 suggested that GIR sing a certain song. I checked out the song and decided that a different character would sing it. Thank you, actress22, for your suggestion. YOU WIN IMAGINARY WAFFLEZ! (I needed more songs for this guy.) **

**Please R&R, as usual.**

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><p>Gen and GIR walk onstage. Gen wears a purple swimsuit while GIR wears swim trunks with tacos all over them and holds a beach ball. "HI, EVERYBODY!"<p>

Zim stares at them. "Eh… why are you two-"

"IT'S SUMMER VACATION!" Gen screams. She takes out the Cup of Punishment and splashes Zim. "PARTY TIME!"

GIR eats a bottle of sunscreen. "Dis 'da best kind! SPF 40!"

Tak blasts through the wall backstage with a bazooka. "Are we gonna do this or did I waste my time coming?"

"Oh, yeah!" Gen says. "Tonight Tsuki will not be co-hosting. She's doing something else this time. GIR shall be filling in for her. This evening's duel is between DIB AND TSUKI!"

Dib sticks his head out from behind the sparkly curtain. "I have to go again? Not fair!"

"YOU GOTTA GO, BIGGY HEAD!" GIR yells. "PUNCHY LADY SAYS SHE WANTS TO KICK YOUR HENIE! Anyway, Biggy Head wanna deticate this song to mastah!"

Gen turns to the crowd. "Sorry, ZADR fans, but don't get your hopes up. And you do not want to attempt to beat anyone up for denying the sick ZADR."

"What're you gonna do about it?" shouts a ZADR fan in the audience.

"The only logical thing," Gen pulls out a big sack. "I'm going to hit you over the head with a large sack of gummy bears."

"ON WITH TEH SHOW! HERE'S BIGGY HEAD!"

Everyone clears out as Dib steps onto the stage with the newly named MICROPHONE OF DOOM.

"Keep drinking coffee, stare me down across the table  
>While I look outside<br>So many things I'd say if only I were able  
>But I just keep quiet and count the cars that pass by<p>

You've got opinions, man  
>We're all entitled to 'em<br>But I never asked

So let me thank you for your time  
>And try not to waste any more of mine<br>Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you dude  
>But I'm not drowning<br>There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree? You are not me  
>Who made you king of anything?<br>So, you dare tell me who to be  
>Who died and made you king of anything?<p>

You sound so innocent  
>All full of good intent<br>Swear you know best

But you expect me to  
>Jump up onboard with you<br>Ride off into your delusional sunset

I'm not the one who's lost  
>With no direction, oh<br>But you'll never see

You're so busy making masks  
>With my name on it in all caps<br>You've got the talking down  
>Just not the listening<p>

Who cares if you disagree? You are not me  
>Who made you king of anything?<br>So you dare tell me who to be  
>Who died and made you king of anything?<p>

All my life I've tried  
>To make everybody happy while I just hurt and hide<br>Waiting for someone to tell me it's my turn  
>To decide<p>

Who cares if you disagree? You are not me  
>Who made you king of anything?<br>So you dare tell me who to be  
>Who died and made you king of anything?<p>

Who cares if you disagree? You are not me  
>Who made you king of anything?<br>So you dare tell me who to be  
>Who died and made you king of anything?<p>

Let me hold your crown, dude."

"What's up with Dib singing girl songs?" Tak asks.

Gen flips through a notepad. "Um… let's see… Ah-hah! This was a song suggested to Captain Bighead after thought from the producer of the show. A couple of words were changed, and it kind of fits his point of view."

Dib is still holding the Microphone of Doom. "So, um, can go backstage now?"

Tsuki shouts from backstage. "YES! Please, do us a favor and hide your face!"

GIR jumps up and throws the beach ball. "Punchy lady'll sing her song after dis commercial break-y thingy!"

_The Invader Zim Singing Challenge is brought to you by: Toast! Toast is delicious bread that has been burned to ash and covered in butter for your enjoyment. So eat it! AAAH HELP ME I'M BEING CHASED BY WOLVERINES AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH-_

…

_Now back to the show!_

"And now we're back!" GIR cries happily. "You miiiiiiiiss us?"

"Next up is Dib's opponent, Tsuki!"

Tsuk steps onstage with the Microphone of Doom. "This is one of my favorite songs…

Well, she lives in a fairy tale  
>Somewhere too far for us to find<br>Forgotten the taste and smell  
>Of the world that she's left behind<p>

It's all about the exposure  
>The lens I told her<br>The angles were all wrong now  
>She's ripping wings off of butterflies<p>

Keep your feet on the ground  
>When your head's in the clouds<p>

Well, go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>To bury the castle, bury the castle

Go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>To bury the castle, bury the castle

So one day he found her crying  
>Coiled up on the dirty ground<br>Her prince finally came to save her  
>And the rest you can figure out<p>

But it was a trick and the clock struck twelve  
>Well, make sure to build your heart<br>Brick by boring brick  
>Or the wolf's gonna blow it down<p>

Keep your feet on the ground  
>When your head's in the clouds<p>

Well, go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>To bury the castle, bury the castle

Go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>And we'll bury the castle, bury the castle

Well, you built up a world of magic  
>Because your real life is tragic<br>Yeah, you built up a world of magic

If it's not real  
>You can't hold it in your hand<br>You can't feel it with your heart  
>And I won't believe it<p>

But if it's true  
>You can see it with your eyes<br>Oh, even in the dark  
>And that's where I want to be, yeah<p>

Go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>To bury the castle, bury the castle

Go get your shovel  
>And we'll dig a deep hole<br>To bury the castle, bury the castle."

(APPLAUSE)

Dib peeks out again. "How come I didn't get applause?"

Zim stands and yells at the top of his… er… "lungs." "BECAUSE YOU ARE A FILTHY LARGE-HEADED HUMAN WHO NO ONE LIKES!"

Gen gets to her feet nervously. "Um, actually, a LOT of people like him…"

"Who? Are they insane?" Zim asks.

"Kinda… They're…" Gen gulps, knowing that the word may bring on unspeakable horror. "Fangirls."

"What?"

"Fangirls. Dib fangirls are a bunch of girls who are in love with Dib and are crazy fans. If you see these dangerous females-" (looks at the camera dramatically) "Do NOT let them anywhere near Dib. They will go insane."

Everyone looks around the room, frightened by this terrifying dark force.

GIR jumps up. "ANYWAY IT'S VOTIN' TIME! WE GOTTA HURRY CUZ CRACKERS AND ME'RE GOIN' TO THE POOL!"

Gen jumps up. "HUZZAH FOR SUMMER!"

GIR passes out the ballots and everyone votes once again.

Gen smiles. "Tonight we have no special guest, so Gaz will announce the winner." Gaz crosses over and grabs the envelope.

"I just want to get this over with so I can go home and play my new game. Tonight you've heard Dib singing 'King of Anything' by Sarah Bareilles and Tsuki singing 'Brick by Boring Brick' by Paramore." She rips open the envelope as if it is Dib's head. "Tsuki wins."

Tsuki comes out with her arms raised over her head in victory. "MUA HA HA HA HA!"

Dib walks onstage as well. "I lost _again_?"

Gen walks over and pas him on the shoulder. "You did well, but… people… just don't… like you."

Zim sneers. "Except for those insane fangirls."

Suddenly a mob of Dib fangirls burst through the door.

"YOU MADE OUR DIBBERS LOSE! NOW YOU ALL DIE!"

The fangirls run around trying to destroy everybody and smother Dib in lunatic love.

GIR, the only one not being attacked, comes up to the camera. "WE'LL SEES YOU NEXT TIME! G'BYE!"

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><p><strong>I. Do. Not. Own. "Brick by Boring Brick". Or. "King of Anything". Good. Bye. <strong>


	4. Gaz vs GIR

**Ok, sorry if I made anyone angry about the whole Dib-fangirl thing.**

**Also, about the Tallest... I'm trying to plan in advance for what everyone's gonna sing, and I forgot to write the Tallest in for a while. But, thanks to fan requests and schedule changing, Red and Purple will both be singing in chapter (checks schedule) 7. Sorry for any inconviniences.**

**And thank you, everyone, for your suggestions. I'm going to try and put some requests in the fic. I need a couple of Zim songs and songs for the Tallest. Thank you, everybody!**

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><p>Gen and Tsuki walk onstage. "Okay, never continue your security duties while you're performing, Tsuki. It's just too easy for the evil fangirls of darkness to get in."<p>

"You're overreacting, Gen."

"ONE TRIED TO EAT MY EAR!"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Well, then maybe you shouldn't have screamed 'down with ZAGR' in her face."

"I DON'T SUPPORT ZAGR!"

"I don't support any of those stupid pairings. Can we just get on with the show? We've got a lot to do." Tsuki says.

Gen clears her throat. "Uh, yeah. Welcome to episode 4 of IZSC! Tonight, another singer makes their debut! Our matchup for this evening is…GIR vs. GAZ!"

Zim suddenly bursts onstage with a giant metal device. "ZIM HAS DONE IT! With my new evil plan all of mankind will bow and tremble at my knees! AH HA HA HA HAH!"

Dib chases him. "You'll never get away with this, Zim!"

Tsuki looks around, confused. "What's going on here?"

"OMIGOSH IT'S A ZIM AND DIB BATTLE!" Gen shrieks in her obsessiveness. "I'm so glad this thing gets recorded!"

"You'll never stop me, Dib-beast. I will destroy you!"

"No, you won't!"

"Yes, I will!"

"No, you won't!"

"Yes, I will!"

"No, you won't!"

"Yes, I will!"

"No, you won't!"

"Yes, I-"

"FOR EDWARD CULLEN'S SAKE WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?" Tsuki hollers.

The rivals slowly back away…

Tsuki breathes heavily in anger. "First up is Gaz."

Gaz steps onstage with the Microphone of Doom (aka MoD).

"I scraped my knees when I was praying  
>And found a demon in my safest haven, seems like<br>It's getting harder to believe in anything  
>Than just to get lost in all my selfish thoughts<p>

I wanna know what it'd be like  
>To find perfection in my pride<br>To see nothing in the light  
>Turn it off in all my spite<br>In all my spite, I'll turn it off

And the worst part is  
>Before it gets any better we're heading for a cliff<br>And in the free fall I will realize  
>I'm better off when I hit the bottom<p>

The tragedy it seems an ending  
>I'm watching everyone I looked up to break and bending<br>We're taking shortcuts in for solutions  
>Just to come out the hero<p>

Well, I can see behind the curtain  
>The world's cranking, turning so wrong<p>

The way we're working  
>Towards a goal, that's not existent<br>It's not existent but we just keep believing

And the worst part is  
>Before it gets any better we're heading for a cliff<br>And in the free fall I will realize  
>I'm better off when I hit the bottom<p>

I wanna know what it'd be like  
>To find perfection in my pride<br>To see nothing in the light  
>Just turn it off in all my spite<br>In all my spite, I'll turn it off  
>Just turn it off again, again, again, yeah<p>

And the worst part is  
>Before it gets any better we're heading for a cliff<br>And in the free fall I will realize  
>I'm better off when I hit the bottom<p>

And the worst part is  
>Before it gets any better we're heading for a cliff<br>And in the free fall I will realize  
>I'm better off when I hit the bottom."<p>

Gaz walks off the stage in all of her little girl scary-ness.

Gen and Tsuki applaud like crazy people. "Love that song!" Gen cries.

"Uh-huh! And you even scare me!" Tsuki says admiringly.

Dib and Zim run across the stage again.

"MUA HA HA HA! My evil plan has been set in action! ZIM SHALL RULE!"

Gen pipes up from the hosts' table. "Y'know, 'ya said the same thing in that unaired 'Mopiness of Doom' episode, and then you- BWA HA HA HA!" She bursts out laughing at the memory.

Zim grinds his teeth together. "Never again speak of it."

Dib laughs as well. "Still feel that confident?"

"ZIM SHALL RULE!" The Irken cries as he runs off to continue.

Dib walks over to Gen and Tsuki. "You said that GIR's singing tonight?"

Tsuki nods. "Yeah."

"Zim can wait, then," Dib says. "I don't wanna miss this."

GIR runs onstage with the MoD. "I GONNA SING NOW!

I hopped off the plane at LAX with a dream and my cardigan  
>Welcome to the land of fame, excess, whoa am I gotta fit in?<br>Jumped in the cab, here I am for the first time  
>Look to my right, and I see the Hollywood sign<p>

This is all so crazy, everybody seems so famous  
>My tummy's turnin' and I'm feelin' kinda homesick<br>Too much pressure and I'm nervous  
>That's when the taxi man turned on the radio<p>

And the Jay-Z song was on  
>And the Jay-Z song was on<br>And the Jay-Z song was on

So I put my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>The butterflies fly away<br>I'm noddin' my head like "Yeah!"  
>Movin' my hips like "Yeah!"<p>

Got my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>And now I'm gonna be okay<br>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!  
>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!<p>

Get to the club in my taxi cab  
>Everybody's lookin' at me now<br>Like "Who's that chick that's rockin' kicks  
>She's gotta be from out of town"<p>

So hard with my girls not around me  
>It's definitely not a Nashville party<br>'Cause all I see are stilettos  
>I guess I never got the memo<p>

My tummy's turnin' and I'm feelin' kinda homesick  
>Too much pressure and I'm nervous<br>That's when the DJ dropped my favorite tune

And the Britney song was on  
>And the Britney song was on<br>And the Britney song was on

So I put my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>The butterflies fly away<br>I'm noddin' my head like "Yeah!"  
>Movin' my hips like "Yeah!"<p>

Got my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>And now I'm gonna be okay<br>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!  
>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!<p>

Feel like hoppin' on a flight, on a flight  
>Back to my hometown tonight, town tonight<br>Something stops me every time, every time  
>The DJ plays my song and I feel alright<p>

So I put my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>The butterflies fly away<br>I'm noddin' my head like "Yeah!"  
>Movin' my hips like "Yeah!"<p>

Got my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>And now I'm gonna be okay<br>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!  
>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!<p>

So I put my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>The butterflies fly away<br>I'm noddin' my head like "Yeah!"  
>Movin' my hips like "Yeah!"<p>

Got my hands up, they're playin' my song  
>And now I'm gonna be okay<br>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!  
>Yeah! It's a party in the USA!"<p>

GIR gives his usual insane smile. "YOU LIKE IT?"

Gen claps wildly. "YES! Anyone else like that song?"

(crickets)

Gen sits back down. "The cricket likes it."

"I don't like Miley Cyrus that much, but GIR, I like just about anything when you sing it," Tsuki says.

Zim runs across the stage again. Dib races up to him and resumes the chase.

"You're not going to get away with this!"

"AH HA HAHA HA HA HA HA!"

They run backstage.

"Is anyone else getting annoyed by that?" Tak says.

"To no end," says Red.

"Can we just vote so that we can go home?" Purple asks.

Tsuki picks up the usual ballots. "Fine. You know the drill. Vote and give me back the ballot."

Everyone votes once again, but this time, Zim and Dib are still arguing backstage. They run out, give Tsuki their ballots, and run back.

Tsuki and Gen take the stage. "Tonight, Purple shall announce the winner!"

Purple takes the stage and grabs the envelope. "Tonight, you've heard Gaz performing 'Turn it Off' by Paramore and GIR performing 'Party in the USA' by Miley Cyrus. The votes are in, and your winner is… GIR!"

Gaz simply kicks a dust bunny and doesn't look like she cares. GIR jumps onstage with excitement and a rubber piggy. "THANK YOU, PEOPOLES! I LUVS YOU! MUFFINS FOR EVERYBODY!" Muffins fly out of GIR's head. Everyone enjoys them.

Then the studio explodes.

Dib pokes his head out from the rubble. "Okay… you got away with it."

Zim is standing on top of a rock, laughing.

"ZIM!

Zim turns to see Tsuki holding a baseball bat and Gen holding her large sack of gummy bears.

"You might wanna run now."

Zim runs around screaming as he is chased by two angry teenage females with weapons. Come back next chapter to see another (very excited) singer's debut!

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><p><strong>(singing) <em>I don't oooooowwwn... "Turn it Off" or "Party in the USA"...<em>**


	5. Zim vs Gen

**Hello! I'm updating like crazy! I guess that's what happens when you're totally obsessed. X3**

**Oh, and crazyjaky, hopefully you'll be pleased by this chapter. ;D**

**HERE WE GO!**

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><p>Tsuki steps onstage. "Hello, everyone. Tonight, you have only one host. We once again have an epic singing battle for you. Oh, and some good news- we fixed the studio!"<p>

Dib walks onstage. "How did you mange that?"

"A whole lotta Duct tape."

Dib saunters away. "Of course…"

Tsuki glares at him, annoyed. "You're lucky Gen likes you, or you'd be in a very bad situation right now…"

Red shouts from the audience. "When're you going to start?"

"Don't complain! And you can't put off your turn forever!" Tsuki yells.

"We're willing to do it as long as possible," says Purple.

"Perhaps that statement will compel the producer to make you go sooner," she replies. "Anyhow, tonight our duel is between… ZIM AND GEN!"

Gen runs onstage with happiness. "Wheeeee! I get to sing! FINALLY!"

"GET BACKSTAGE! ZIM GOES FIRST!" Tsuki shouts. Gen runs backstage while Zim enters with the MoD.

Zim clears his throat. "I don't want to dedicate this to anyone."

GIR calls out from the cast seats. "But master, you said you picked it for Ms. Tak!"

"BE QUIET!" Zim shrieks. "I do not love Ta-"

"YES YOU DO!"

"LIES!"

"JUST GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!" Tsuki shouts.

Zim hold sup the MoD. "Fine.

Pressure!

Pushing down on me  
>Pressing down on you no man ask for<br>Under pressure  
>That burns a building down<br>Splits a family in two  
>Puts people on streets<p>

Bah bah dah bah bah dah  
>(Yeah) (Yeah)<p>

That's okay!  
>It's the terror of knowing<br>What this world is about  
>Watching some good friends<br>Scream "Let me out!"  
>Pray tomorrow takes me higher<br>Pressure on people  
>People on streets<p>

Bah bah dah bah bah dah  
>Okay!<p>

Chippin' around  
>Kick my brains round the floor<br>These are the days  
>It never rains but it pours<br>Bah bah dah bah bah dah

People on streets  
>bah dah dee da day<br>People on streets  
>bah dah dee dah dee dah dee dah dee dah<p>

It's the terror of knowing  
>What this world is about<br>Watching some good friends  
>Scream "Let me out!"<br>Pray tomorrow takes me higher (higher)

Yeah!

Turned away from it all  
>Like a blind man<br>Sat on a fence but it don't work  
>Keep coming up with love<br>But it's so slashed and torn

Why? Why? Why?  
>Love(love)! Love(love)! Love(love)!<p>

Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking  
>Can't we give ourselves one more chance?<br>Why can't we give love that one more chance?  
>Why can't we give love give love give love?<br>Give love give love give love give love give love?

Cause love's such an old fashioned word  
>And love dares you to care<br>For the people on the edge of the night  
>And love dares you to change our ways<br>Of caring about ourselves

This is our last dance  
>This is our last dance<br>This is ourselves under pressure

Under pressure  
>Under pressure."<p>

"Let me just get one thing straight. Zim- I DON'T LIKE YOU LIKE THAT." Tak says.

Gen screams from backstage. "Maybe you will someday!"

Tsuki is laughing. "Ah, the great Zim romance debate. Is it ZAGR?"

"NEVER!" shouts Zim.

"Sick," says Gaz.

Tsuki smirks. "What about ZATR?"

"Eventually!" hollers Gen, again backstage.

"No," says Tak.

Zim only looks around nervously.

Tsuki gives and evi grin. "What about… ZADR?"

"NEVER! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?" screeches Dib.

"I'D RATHER BE BANISHED TO PLANET DIRT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE AND GET SLOWLY EATEN BY A SPOOKTUS THAN DO THAT!" cries Zim.

"BOOOOOOOOOO ZADR!" shouts Gen.

Tsuki smiles. "Ha. For the record, I'm not a ZADR fangirl. I just like to torture people with it." She clears her throat. "Our second contestant tonight is Gen."

Gen bounces onstage with glee. She takes the MoD from Zim. "Prepare to be crushed," she says with a smirk. Heavy rock music begins to play.

"Oh, please. I'm not going to be defeated by a filthy human!"

"You so sure about that?" she begins to sing with Zim still onstage.

"If I'm a bad person, you don't like me  
>Well, I guess I'll make my own way<br>It's a circle, a mean cycle  
>I can't excite you anymore<p>

Where's your gavel? Your jury?  
>What's my offense this time?<br>You're not a judge but if you're gonna judge me  
>Well, sentence me to another life<p>

Don't wanna hear your sad songs  
>I don't wanna feel your pain<br>When you swear it's all my fault  
>'Cause you know we're not the same<br>No, we're not the same, oh, we're not the same

We're the friends who stuck together  
>We wrote our names in blood<br>But I guess you can't accept that the change is good  
>It's good, it's good<p>

Well, you treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out

You treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out

Ignorance is your new best friend  
>Ignorance is your new best friend<p>

This is the best thing that could've happened  
>Any longer and I wouldn't have made it<br>It's not a war, no, it's not a rapture  
>I'm just a person but you can't take it<p>

The same tricks that, that once fooled me  
>They won't get you anywhere<br>I'm not the same kid from your memory  
>Well, now I can fend for myself<p>

Don't wanna hear your sad songs  
>I don't wanna feel your pain<br>When you swear it's all my fault  
>'Cause you know we're not the same<br>No, we're not the same, oh, we're not the same

Yeah, we used to stick together  
>We wrote our names in blood<br>But I guess you can't accept that the change is good  
>It's good, it's good<p>

Well, you treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>Well, I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out

You treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>Well, I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out  
>Ignorance is your new best friend<br>Ignorance is your new best friend  
>Ignorance is your new best friend<br>Ignorance is your new best friend

Well, you treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>Well, I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out

You treat me just like another stranger  
>Well, it's nice to meet you, sir<br>I guess I'll go, I best be on my way out."

(APPLAUSE)

Zim stares, unimpressed. "Garbage."

Gen holds up the MoD again. "_Yeah, yeah well you're just a mess… 'Ya do all this big talkin'… So now let's see you walk it… I said let's see you walk it!"_

Zim blinks. "And that means…?"

Tsuki pushes Zim off the stage. "She wants you to prove it. And we'll find out who's right in a minute, because it's time to vote!"

Red and Purple push their way onstage. "How come we can't decide who wins?" Red says.

"We always get to decide this kinda stuff on Irk!" Purple adds.

Tsuki growls. "FYI, you're not on Irk anymore. In addition, I'm the host, and finally, I DON'T LIKE YOU!"

"You don't like anyone, do you?" Purple sneers.

"I do. I like GIR, I like Tak, I like Gaz, I tolerate Zim…"

"HEY!" Zim cries. "I AM SUPERIOR TO YOU ALL!"

Gen throws Cup of Punishment water on him again. "You keep telling yourself that," she replies as he writhes in pain.

Tsuki shoves everyone off the stage. "If you all are done, I HAVE A FIC TO HOST! Now, everyone, take a stupid ballot and vote."

As the cast votes, Tsuki goes backstage to calm down and have some Mountain Dew.

When she comes back out, the envelope is in her hand.

"How do they get the envelope like that?" Dib asks, but he is ignored, as usual.

Tsuki stands at the center of the stage. "Our first singer tonight was Zim performing 'Under Pressure' by My Chemical Romance. Then we had Gen singing 'Ignorance' by Paramore. And your winner is…"

"Prepare to be destroyed, filthy Gen-human."

"…Gen."

"WHAT?" Zim shrieks as Gen mounts the stage in victory.

"Ha! Take that, _kitanai _Irken-san!"

Zim shakes his fist in anger. "ZIM WILL CONQUER YOOOOOUUU! AND YOU WILL ALSO SURRENDER TO ME THE MEANING OF THIS '_KITANAI_' WORD!"

Gen ROFLs.

Tsuki walks up to the camera. "That's all for tonight. Will Zim or Dib ever win anything? Will Gen reveal the meaning of the word _kitanai_? Who cares? Oh- and our next episode is our very first DUET BATTLE! See 'ya next time if you even care!"

* * *

><p><strong>I hath not any owner ship of yonder "Under Pressure", "Ignorance", or "Fences".<strong>


	6. Gaz and Tak vs ?

**This chapter introduces the TEAM CHALLENGE. When the singers are announced, their names will be bolded, italicized, or underlined to represent the parts of the music they sing individually. Normal text is sung by both characters. It's hard to explain, but maybe you'll get it while you read the fic. **

**Any text marked with an * is sung by GIR, in the background.**

* * *

><p>Gen is bouncing up and down onstage. Tsuki stands a few feet away, looking confused. "Why are you so happy?" she asks.<p>

Gen twirls. "The first team challenge is today!" She stops and begins to laugh. "I'm just really excited about one of the duets!"

"Um… yeah… So, anyway, you heard right. Tonight, instead of two solos, we'll be hearing two duets. "

"First up we have TAK AND GAZ!"

Dib gets onto the stage. "Wait, don't you guys usually announce all the singers at once?"

Gen bursts out laughing again while Tsuki picks him up and throws him off the stage. Gen pauses in her laughter to say, "Why do you hate Dib so much?"

"He is very annoying," Tsuki replies. "Now, here are _Tak_ and **Gaz."**

The two girls walk onstage, Tak looking enthusiastic, Gaz looking just plain bored.

"_There's some things that I regret,  
>Some words I wish had gone unsaid,<br>Some starts,  
>That had some bitter endings,<br>Been some bad times I've been through,  
>Damage I cannot undo,<br>Some things,  
>I wish I could do all all over again,<br>But it don't really matter,  
>Life gets that much harder,<br>It makes you that much stronger,  
>Oh, some pages turned,<br>Some bridges burned,  
>But there were,<br>Lessons learned.  
><em>  
>And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,<br>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,  
>Every change, life has thrown me,<br>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,  
>I'm grateful, for every scar,<br>Some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were lessons learned.  
><strong><br>There's mistakes that I have made,  
>Some chances I just threw away,<br>Some roads,  
>I never should've taken,<br>Been some signs I didn't see,  
>Hearts that I hurt needlessly,<br>Some wounds,  
>That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,<br>But it don't make no difference,  
>The past can't be rewritten,<br>You get the life you're given,  
>Oh, some pages turned,<br>Some bridges burned,  
>But there were,<br>Lessons learned.**

And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,<br>Every change, life has thrown me,  
>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,<br>I'm grateful, for every scar,  
>Some pages turned,<br>Some bridges burned,  
>But there were lessons learned.<p>

_And all the things that break you_,  
><em>Are all the things that make you strong,<br>_**You can't change the past,  
>Cause it's gone,<br>And you just gotta move on,**  
><em>Because it's all,<br>_**Lessons learned.  
><strong>  
>And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,<br>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,  
>Every change, life has thrown me,<br>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,  
>I'm grateful, for every scar,<br>Some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were lessons learned,  
>Oh, some pages turned,<br>Some bridges burned,  
>But there were lessons learned,<br>Lessons learned."

(APPLAUSE)

"Wow!" Tsuki says. "That was great!"

Gen laughs again and nudges Zim. "Well, _kitanai_-boy? Did _you _like it?"

"Silence…" Zim growls. Gen cracks up again.

"Thank you," Tak says into the MoD before walking offstage. Gaz just drops the other microphone and leaves.

Tsuki drags Gen up to the MoD. "And now, if she'll shut up for two seconds, Gen will announce the second group of the night."

Gen bites back the laughter and pulls herself together. She grabs the MoD. "Our second act of the night will be… **ZIM **and _Dib_!"

Both of them look up in horror. "WHAT?" they shriek in unison.

Gen grins. "You guys seriously didn't see this coming?"

"NO!" Dib screeches. "The producer called me for a one-on-one rehearsal session for tonight!"

"The production human did the same with me!"

Tsuki took the MoD. "Duh, she recommended the same song to both of you so that you'd sing it together."

Gen turns to the camera. "WARNING: ZADR fans, don't get your hopes up."

Zim is now onstage, in his disguise, with Dib standing next to him. The hosts run to their table below.

"And now," Tsuki says. "**Zim **and _Dib_."

Zim and Dib begin to sing not to the audience, but to each other.

"_You, with your words like knives and swords and weapons that you use against me  
><em>**You have knocked me off my feet again got me feeling like I'm nothing  
><strong>_You, with your voice like nails on a chalkboard, calling me out when I'm wounded  
><em>**You, pickin' on the weaker man**

**Well, you can take me down with just one single blow  
>But you don't know what you don't know<strong>

**Someday I'll be living in a big old city**  
><strong>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<strong>

_Someday I'll be big enough so you can't hit me  
>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<em>

Why you gotta be so mean?

**You, with your switching sides and your walk-by LIES and your humiliation  
><strong>_You, have pointed out my flaws again as if I don't already see them  
>I'll walk with my head down trying to block you out 'cause I'll never impress you<br>_**I just wanna feel okay again**

_I'll bet you got pushed around, somebody made you cold  
>But the cycle ends right now 'cause you can't lead me down that road<br>And you don't know what you don't know_

_Someday I'll be living in a big old city_  
><em>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<em>

**Someday I'll be big enough so you can't hit me  
>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<br>**  
>Why you gotta be so mean?<p>

_And I can see you years from now in a bar, talking over a football game  
>With that same big loud opinion but nobody's listening<br>_**Washed up and ranting about the same old bitter things  
>Drunk and grumbling on about how I can't sing<strong>

But all you are is mean

_All you are is mean_ **and a liar and pathetic and **_**alone in life  
><strong>__And mean_, **and mean**, _and mean_, AND MEAN

But someday I'll be living in a big old city  
>And all you're ever gonna be is mean, yeah<br>Someday, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me  
>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<p>

Why you gotta be so mean?*

**Someday, I'll be, living in a big old city  
><strong>(Why you gotta be so mean?)*  
><strong>And all you're ever gonna be is mean<strong>  
>(Why you gotta be so mean?)*<br>_Someday, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me_  
>(Why you gotta be so mean?)*<br>_And all you're ever gonna be is mean_

Why you gotta be so mean?"

(SUPERGIANT APPLAUSE)

Zim and Dib take a bow.

Gen is laughing her head off again. "That was the absolute best performance either of you have ever done!"

Tsuki remains calm. "That actually was really good. You always do best when it comes from the heart. BUT NOW WE SHALL VOTE!"

The usual happens: the ballots are passed out, everyone votes, blabbity blabbity blah…

Tsuki and Gen take the stage. Gen holds the MoD. "Tonight's special guest is… MINIMOOSE!"

Minimoose comes back from behind the shiny curtains in the midst of a crowd of screaming Minimoose fangirls and confetti.

"Squeak!"

"Well said, Minimoose, well said." Gen says as she holds up the MoD to him.

The next hour is spent trying to find a way for Minimosse to open the envelope.

Tsuki finally straightens up. "Um, I'll open the envelope tonight. You've seen Gaz and Tak sing 'Lessons Learned" by Carrie Underwood as well as Zim and Dib performing 'Mean' by Taylor Swift."

"TAYLOR SWIFT ROX!"

Tsuki glares at Gen.

"Sorry."

"NOW, your winners for the chapter are… ZIM AND DIB!"

(APPLAUSE)

Dib looks around in astonishment. "We finally won something?"

Zim makes the victory symbol. "VICTORY!" (Redundant, yes?) "ZIM HAS WON! ZIM SHALL RULE!"

Dib looks up. "I won, too, y'know."

"ZIM DOES NOT CARE!"

GIR comes up to the camera to close the chapter. "G'bye, everybody! Next chappy teh Tallests're gonna sing! WHEEEEEE!"

* * *

><p><strong>I don't own "Lessons Learned" or "Mean".<strong>


	7. Tak and Zim vs The Tallest

**Agh! Sorry it's been so long since I updated this, I've been preoccupied with other things (including typing my Ace Attorney fic), and then I didn't know what to make a group of contestans sing and a bunch of other stuff...**

**As I am completley obsessed with Ace Attorney, this chapter will have several references to those games. For those of you who have no clue what I'm talking aout and don't care, I apologize. Please bear with me and review, cux reviews make meh HAPPEH!**

**As usual, normal text means that the enritre group is singin'.**

* * *

><p>Tsuki walks onstage. She pauses, waiting for Gen, who eventually enters playing her DS.<p>

"What are you doing?" Tsuki asks irritably.

"I'm playing Phoenix Wright!" Gen replies. "I just unlocked a new case! Based on the rest of the Ace Attorney games I've played, someone's gonna die."

Dib walks onstage. "That's a weird game…"

Gen snaps up and yells at him. "OBJECTION! OKAY, MAYBE IT'S WEIRD BUT I LIKE IT! DO YOU HAVE ANY EVIDENCE? I THINK NOT!" She buries herself in the game.

Tsuki glares at her friend. "Go sit at the hosts' table." Gen walks away.

Tsuki turns to the camera. "Sorry about that. Anyway, welcome to episode seven of the Invader Zim Singing Challenge! Tonight is our second duet battle… ZIM AND TAK vs. THE TALLEST!"

Zim jumps onstage. "What? ZIM sang in the last pitiful chapter! I don't wanna go again!"

Tsuki gives a smart grin. "Did you hear me say that you're singing with Tak?"

"Okay. I'll do it."

As she mounts the stage, Tak slaps him.

Tsuki settles down at the hosts' table only to have Gen shove her DS in her face. "See? That dude got shot and now he's dead! Told you!"

Lard Nar speaks up. "Can you make her stop?"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Trust me- this is way better than earlier this year when she played the original game…"

FLASHBACK:

Gen taps her DS with Tsuki reading "Twilight". She watches the screen in rapt attention. "I just started the fourth case! One guy on a boat just got killed! "Ooh! They're gonna show me a glimpse of who did it- AAAAAAAAAHHHHH! WHAT THE HECK? EDGEWORTH? WHY ARE YOU HOLDING THE GUN! NOOOOOOO!" She screams like a lunatic and runs out of the room. Tsuki slaps herself in the face.

END FLASHBACK!

Gen looks around, embarrassed, and slowly puts down the game…

GIR bounces onstage in a cute little tux. "And now, **Mastah **and _Ms. Tak_!"

"_Oh no, I just keep on falling_  
><em><strong>Back to the same old<strong>__  
>And where's hope when misery comes crawling?<em>  
><strong>Oh my way, hey<strong>  
><strong><br>With your faith you'll trigger a landslide**  
>(<em>Victory<em>)  
><strong>You kill off this common sense of mind<strong>

_It takes acquired minds_ **to taste  
>To taste, to taste this wine<br>**_You can't down it with your eyes  
><em>**So we don't need the headlines  
>We don't need the headlines, we just want<strong>

_We want the airwaves back  
>We want the airwaves back<br>_  
>Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing<br>_Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?  
><em>Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see  
><em>Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?<em>

_Right now, you're the only reason  
><em>**I'm not letting go, oh**  
><em>And time out if everyone's worth pleasing<br>_  
><strong>Well ha ha, you'll trigger a landslide<strong>  
>(<em>Victory<em>)  
><strong>To kill off their finite state of mind<br>**  
><em>It takes acquired minds<em> **to taste  
>To taste, to taste this wine<br>**_You can't down it with your eyes_  
><strong>So we don't need the headlines<strong>  
><strong>No, we don't want your headlines, we just want<strong>

_We want the airwaves back  
>We want the airwaves back<em>

Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
><em>Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?<em>  
>Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see<br>_Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure now?_

Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
>Tell me, tell me, do you feel the pressure?<p>

_Alright, so you think you're ready?  
>Okay, then you say this with me, go<br>_We were born for this  
>We were born for this<p>

_Alright, so you think you're ready?  
>Okay, then you say this with me, go<br>We were born for this_  
><strong>We were born for this<br>**_We were born for this  
><em>**We were born for this  
><strong>  
><strong>We were born for<br>**_We were born for  
><em>  
><em>Everybody sing<em> like it's the last song you will ever sing  
>Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure?<br>Everybody live like it's the last day you will ever see  
>Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure now?<p>

Everybody sing like it's the last song you will ever sing  
>Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure?<br>Tell me, tell me, can you feel the pressure?

We were born for this  
>We were born for this<br>We were born for this."

APPLAUSE

Tsuki raises an eyebrow. "Tak, you were really good. Zim, you were off-key. The whole time."

Zim glares down in defiance. "LIES! Zim was not off of your pathetic door-opening device! ZIM SHALL RULE!"

"Uh, yeah, you were," says Gen, who has finally stopped playing her game.

"LIIIEEEESS! Zim's vocal organ is made of steel and CANNOT BE DEFEATED!"

Gen starts laughing. "You should meet Polly!"

"Who on Irk is Polly?" Tak asks. Her question is ignored.

"Anyway, I love that song!" Gen shouts happily.

"You always say that," Dib says.

"It's because the author picks songs she likes and didn't know what to have Zim and Tak sing so she just picked another Paramore song, you big-headed idiot," Tsuki says.

"My head's not big-"

"Your. Head. Is. Big. Stop. Saying. It. Isn't."

Dib hops up onto the stage. "Okay, then let's see. Everyone who thinks that y head is big, raise your hands."

Everyone raises their hands.

Dib hangs his freakishly mammoth head and walks offstage.

GIR comes over to him and pats him on the back in an attempt to console him. "It's okay, Biggy Head."

"GIR! Do not comfort the enemy!"

"YES, MY MASTER!" GIR's eyes glow red and he throws a can of lemonade at Dib's large head.

Tsuki drags the Tallest onto the stage. "And now these two lumbering fools are going to sing and embarrass themselves."

"Foolishly foolish fools who foolishly rule a foolish empire of fools with foolish foolishness!"

"SHUT UP, GEN! And now, Red and _Purple_."

The Tallest each pick up an MoD and begin.

"We hope you take off your stupid PAK  
>While crying and listening to Mozart<br>_You mean and moan about L.A.  
>Wishing you were in the rain reading Hemingway<em>  
>You don't eat meat and drive electrical cars<br>You're so indie rock it's almost an art  
><em>You need money<br>Just to stay alive_

You're so stupid and you can't even invade  
><span>No you can't even in-,<span> no _you can't even in-,_ no you can't even invade  
>You're so stupid and you can't even invade<br>_No you can't even in-,_ no you can't even in-, no you can't even invade

_You're so mad maybe you should buy a big mac  
>You're so short you should really explode<em>  
>Secretly you you're so amused<br>And nobody understands you  
><em>We're so mean cuz cannot get you out of your head<br>I'm so angry cuz you'd rather my space instead_  
>We can't believe we ever trusted<br>With someone that wears more make up and

You're so stupid and you don't even invade  
><em>No you can't even in<em>_-_, no you can't even in-, no you can't even invade  
>You're so stupid and you can't even invade<br>No you can't even in_-__, no you can't even in-,_no you can't even in-

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
>La, la, la<br>La, la, la  
>Oh, oh, oh<br>Do, do, do, do, bop, bop, bow  
>Do, do, do, bop, bop. day<br>You're so stupid, _you're so stupid  
><em>  
>You walking around like you're oh so debonair<br>You pull them down and there's really nothing there  
>We wish you would just disappear into the vastness of space<p>

You're so stupid and you can't even invade  
><span>No you can't even in-,<span> _no you can't even in_-, no you can't even invade  
>You're so stupid and you can't even invade<br>_No you can't even in-,_ no you can't even in-, no you can't even invade  
>You're so stupid and you can't even invade<br>No you can't even in-, _no you can't even in_-, no you can't even invade  
><em>No you can't even in-,<em> no you can't even in-, no, no, no, no, no, no."

APPLAUSE

"Okay, I have a question. WHY THE (H-E-double-hockey-sticks) WERE YOU SINGING KATY PERRY?" Tsuki shouts with anger.

"Author ran out of ideas again."

"Okaaayyy…" Tsuki says, looking back at the Tallest. "So, you guys sounded… well, let's say I'm not tempted to throw up."

"You just like being mean, don't you?" Dib says to Tsuki.

"Yes. By the way, your head isn't big. It's HORRIBLE, GROSS, and COLOSSAL."

"Okay, before anyone gets injured, it's time to vote!" Gen says quickly. Tsuki grumbles assent and passes out the usual ballots.

Everybody votes and stuff…

Tsuki takes the stage with the winners' envelope. "The producer arranged two special guests for tonight, so here they are… Nick and Miles!"

Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth step onstage.

"OMIGOSHEDGEWORTHILOVEYOU!" Gen screams and glomps Edgeworth's leg. She does not let go.

Phoenix laughs. "I think she looks good on your leg, Egdeworth."

"Shut up, Wright…"

Tsuki grabs Gen's shirt and pulls her off of Miles' leg. "Okay, fangirl, get off. We have work to do."

Gen stands and tries to retain what little of her dignity remains. "Sorry. I'm just a big… fan."

Tsuki gives Phoenix the envelope. He clears his throat and begins to read. "First, we've heard Zim and Tak singing "Born for This" by Paramore and the Tallest singing their own vwersion of "Ur so Stupid" by Katy Perry. Your winners are… ZIM AND TAK!"

APPLAUSE

The two take the stage proudly. Zim pushes in front of everybody. "MUA HA HA HA HA! ZIM HAS WON AGAIN! ZIM SHALL RULE YOU AALLLLLLL!"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Great, do you want us to give you a ring?"

Gen pulls her eyes away from Miles and Phoenix. "Me no unnerstand."

Tak and Tsuki both slap their foreheads. "When humans win a sports championship, everyone on the team gets a ring," says Tak.

"Seriously. I can't think of a single sport where they don't do that," Tsuki replies.

"_Iiiif you liked it then you should'a put a ring on it…_"

Tsuki rolls her eyes and moves away as everyone else clears off the stage. "Well, I'm going to close the show now because Gen is really ticking me off, so we'll see you next time when we don't have a bunch of annoying lawyers in here. Peace!"

* * *

><p><strong>OBJECTION! I don't own "Born for This" or "Ur so Stupid"!<strong>

***I've actually never listened to "Ur so Stupid". I just found the lyrics and changed them for the fic.**


	8. Gaz vs Tak

Tsuki and Gen come out of a tent in the middle of the woods, at night.

Gen waves frantically. "HAI! WE'Z CAMPING!"

Dib looks around, confused. "Wait, you're shooting a fanfiction show in the middle of the woods?"

"YES!"

"Why?"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Ask the author."

Gen gives a creepy smile. "Well, since we're camping, I know what to do!" *starts singing with GIR*

"_Let`s gather 'round the campfire and sing our campfire song_

_Our C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song and if you don`t think that we can sing it faster than your wrong but it`ll help if you just sing along_

_Bum bum buuummm_

_C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song  
>C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song and if you don't think that we can sing it faster than you wrong but it'll help if you just sing along ]<br>C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E-S-O-N-G_

GIR!

Song! C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E!

Dibbeh!

…

Good!

_It'll help, it'll help if you just sing along!_

OH YEAH!"

Zim comes out of another tent with GIR on his head. "Why must the MIGHTY ZIM share a tent with GIR and the Dib? Zim should have his own tent of AMAZINGNESS!"

Gen giggles. "Cuz it's funnier that way."

GIR jumps off of Zim's head, breaks into the food, and pulls out a bunch of marshmallows. "LET'Z MAKE S'MOREZ NOW!"

Tsuki smiles and kneels down to GIR's height. "Later, GIR. We have to run the fic right now. We'll make s'mores in a little bit, 'kay?"

Dib is confused. "How come you're so nice to him-"

"SHUT UP, BIGHEAD!"

Tak and Gaz walk up to the others, annoyed. "When are we going to get to do this?" Tak says impatiently.

The Tallest come out of a tent with Professor Membrane, and Lard Nar. "How come you shoved four of us into one tent?"

Tsuki glares at them. "We only have four tents. Two for the girls and two for the guys, plus it's funny to see you all suffer."

"Oh, your sick, sick emo mind," Gen laughs. "ANYWAY NOW GAZ IS GONNA SING!"

Gaz stands on a tree stump because there's no stage in the middle of the woods.

"You were my conscience  
>So solid now you're like water<br>And we started drowning  
>Not like we'd sink any farther<br>But I let my heart go  
>It's somewhere down at the bottom<br>But I'll get a new one  
>And come back from the hope that you've stolen<p>

I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world  
>From turning into a monster, and eating us alive<br>Don't you ever wonder how we survive?  
>Well, now that you're gone the world is ours<p>

I'm only human  
>I've got a skeleton in me<br>But I'm not the villain  
>Despite what you're always preaching<br>Call me a traitor  
>I'm just collecting your victims<br>And they're getting stronger  
>I hear them calling, and calling<p>

I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world  
>From turning into a monster, and eating us alive<br>Don't you ever wonder how we survive?  
>Well, now that you're gone the world is ours<p>

Well, you thought of straight big solutions  
>But I like the tension<br>And not always knowing the answers  
>But you're gonna lose it<br>You're gonna lose it

I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world  
>From turning into a monster, and eating us alive<br>Don't you ever wonder how we survive?  
>Well, now that you're gone the world<p>

I'll stop the whole world, I'll stop the whole world  
>From turning into a monster, and eating us alive<br>Don't you ever wonder how we survive?  
>Well, now that you're gone the world is ours."<p>

"YAY MORE PARAMORE!" Gen says and runs around the campfire like crazy.

"See, this is why she should never eat s'mores, GIR," Dib says. GIR just smiles and nods adorably.

Tsuki stands up angrily. "We're going to tell horror stories. No camping trip is complete without them." Everyone gathers around the fire.

TEN MINUTES LATER…

"And when he opened the elevator, there was a dead body inside! The flight attendant saw him standing there and arrested him for the murder…"

"Gen, it's just not scary when you retell the plot of your Ace Attorney Investigations game. It's the annoying bighead's turn," Tsuki says.

Dib, only the third person to tell a story (after GIR and Gen) looks around spookily. "It was a dark and stormy night…"

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" Gen and GIR stand up and run into the trees in a pathetic panic of terror.

*awkward silence*

Tak clears her throat. "Um, is it my turn to sing now?"

"Yeah," Tsuki rises and calls out into the darkness. "GEN! GIR! WE'RE FINISHING THE SINGING NOW!" They randomly pop out holding waffles.

Tak stands on the stump. "Now, I'd like to dedicate this song to Zim…"

Zim smiles and sticks his chest out with selfish pride.

Tak just smiles evilly.

"Lately I've been reeling  
>Off the way you got me feeling<br>I've been tired of this for way too long  
>You give me answers when I didn't ask<br>You keep bringing up my past  
>Always play the same old song<br>Tired of buying all your lies  
>Acting like I am alright<br>So I hope you liked it last time 'cause that will be the final time I wear my painted smile  
>and sing along<br>Yesterday's where you belong

Ready, ready to put you behind me  
>Ready, ready to go<br>Ready, ready to show you the doorway  
>I think you need to know<br>That taking your time is out of the question  
>You're moving way too slow<br>I'll never stay down  
>I don't want you around<br>Ready, ready to go

Can I make it anymore clear?  
>You're no longer welcome here<br>I guess you need to hear it again  
>I've got a brand new life<br>Love's on my side  
>Games over, you lose I win<br>Yes, I'll tell you one more time  
>No see you later it's goodbye<br>Hey, you need to pay attention  
>I don't know how you keep missin' everything I'm trying to say<br>Listen close, I'm moving on

I'll put this behind me  
>The way you define me<br>Love says I'm something more  
>I'm over the pain<br>I'm done with the shame  
>I found what I waited for<br>You left me with scars  
>But He healed my heart<br>I found my place  
>Secure in His arms<br>So, I'll put this behind me  
>Yeah, I'll put you behind<br>I'll put you behind me

Ready, ready, ready  
>Ready, ready, ready<br>Ready, ready, ready

taking your time is out of the question  
>You're moving way too slow<br>I'll never stay down  
>I don't want you around<br>ready, ready to go

Yeah, I'll put this behind me  
>Taking your time is out of the question<br>Yeah, I'll put this behind me…"

Zim, upon hearing the lyrics, appears shocked and deflated/

"I love that song so much!"

"You two love every song."

"I DUN CARE!" Gen and GIR glomp each other.

"That was really good. I like revenge-y songs," Tsuki says and looks at Dib with a death glare.

"Oh, come on! What did I ever do to you?" Dib shrieks.

"I JUST HATE YOU, OKAY? YOU'RE ANNOYING AND UGLY!"

"Awww… Dun call Dibbeh ugly…" Gen says.

Zim sticks his… eh… where his nose should be into the air. "I think he's ugly. And because I am the ALMIGHTY ZIM I am right. Throw Dib into the campfire!"

"WHAT?"

Dib runs away from Zim as everyone else in camp stares.

"My poor, lunatic son who nobody likes," Profssor Membrane says, shaking his head.

"Okaaayyy, we've wasted enough time tonight. EVERYBODY VOTE!" Tsuki shouts.

Everyone votes using leaves for ballots.

Gen jumps onto the stump. "Tonight, our special guest is a RANDOM ANGRY BEAR!"

A bear bounds into the campsite and growls so loudly that the Tallest fly into the depths of the forest.

"GEN, ARE YOU CRAZY?"

"YES!"

The bear goes wild and chases everybody around the camp. In the middle of the pandemonium, Tsuki runs up to the camera. "Tonight's winner is Tak- AW MAN HE GOT TO THE FOOD! We'll see you next chapter when we're not being chased by a bear because a certain _someone_ was being an IDIOT!"

"Don't blame meeeeeeeeee!"


	9. Gaz and Dib vs Zim and GIR

**Oka, if you are getting annoyed by all the Paramore, I resorted to it in this chapter again cuz I didn't know what to do. Sorry for the SUPER slow updates, and please find it in your hearts to forgive me and show it by reviewing.**

* * *

><p>"Court is now in session for the trial of Mr. Dib… um… does this kid have a last name?"<p>

Instead of the usual studio, everyone is in a courtroom. Tsuki sits at the judge's bench. Dib stands with his lawyer, Lard Nar, behind the defense table.

Tsuki clears her throat. "What are the charges against the large-headed defendant?"

"The defendant, Dib is being charged with the murder of GIR's 343rd rubber piggy. He killed the victim during a struggle with an Irken Invader."

"WHY IS GEN THE PROSECUTOR AND WHY ARE WE HAVING A TRIAL DURING A SINGING SHOW?" Dib shouts.

"OBJECTION!" Gen shouts. "WE'RE DOING THIS CUZ YOU KILLED GIR'S RUBBER PIGGEH AND I'M THE PROSECUTOR CUZ I WANT TO BE THE PROSECUTOR SO SHUT UP!"

"I didn't kill any rubber pig! Lard Nar, hear me out!"

Lard Nar, looking XD cute in his little lawyer suit, clears his throat. "My client, Dib… yes, Dib, is innocent of the toy's murder.

Tsuki cocks her head to the side. "We'll see." She turns to the camera. "Hi. I know this is weird, but we're combining this episode of IZSC with a murder trial. One of GIR's many rubber piggies exploded yesterday. Dib is accused of killing the pig. So, please bear with us and ignore the insane prosecution."

"I'M SANE!"

"And that's what Dib says, and he's a killer."

"I AM NOT A KILLER!"

Tsuki hits Red with her gavel. "ORDER!"

Red rubs his head. "What was that for?"

Tsuki grins evilly. "Most judges bang the bench. I hit people on the head. Do not question my methods. Now, the prosecution may call its first witness."

Gen nods. "The witness will come to the stand… after the defendant and his sister sing for the court."

Tsuki hits Dib with her gavel. "Dib! **Gaz!** Your turn to sing. Do it."

Gaz drags Dib onstage. He is cuffed, as he is the defendant. "Um, how am I supposed to hold the microphone when my hands are restrained?"

"First of all, it's the microphone of DOOM." Gen says irritably. "And second, you will be using a headset mic. BAILIFF! GET THE HEADSET!"

Tallest Purple runs up and puts the headset on Dib. "Y'know, we're not your slaves!"

Tsuki glares. "No, but you ARE the bailiffs. Now, leave. It is time for Gaz and the annoying bighead to sing."

Gaz snickers while Dib sighs.

"**I am outside**  
><strong>And I've been waiting for the sun<strong>  
><strong>And with my wide eyes<strong>  
><strong>I've seen worlds that don't belong<strong>

**My mouth is dry**  
><strong>With words I cannot verbalize<strong>  
><strong>Tell me why we live like this<strong>

**Keep me safe inside**  
><strong>Your arms like towers<strong>  
><strong>Tower over me, yeah<strong>

'Cause we are broken  
>What must we do to restore<br>Our innocence?  
>And oh, the promise we adored<br>Give us life again  
>'Cause we just wanna be whole<p>

**Lock the doors**  
><strong>'Cause I'd like to capture this voice<strong>  
><strong>It came to me tonight<strong>  
><strong>So everyone will have a choice<strong>

**And under red lights**  
><strong>I'll show myself it wasn't forged<strong>  
><strong>We're at war, we live like this<strong>

**Keep me safe inside**  
><strong>Your arms like towers<strong>  
><strong>Tower over me<strong>

'Cause we are broken  
>What must we do to restore<br>Our innocence?  
>And oh, the promise we adored<br>Give us life again  
>'Cause we just wanna be whole<p>

Tower over me  
><strong>Tower over me<br>**And I'll take the truth at any cost

'Cause we are broken  
>What must we do to restore<br>Our innocence  
>And oh, the promise we adored<br>Give us life again  
>'Cause we just wanna be whole."<p>

APPLAUSE

"The judge finds that to be a great performance, despite the fact that the big-head, idiotic, insane defendant was singing," Tsuki says. "That is a truly excellent song."

"That Paramore thing again?" Purple says. "Bak602's running out of ideas, right?"

Bak602 runs out, screams, "JUST FOR SOME OF THE SONGS, OKAY?" and runs away.

Gen folds her arms professionally. "Now, the prosecution would like to call its witness to the stand."

Zim stands on top of the witness stand as if he's just won a battle.

"Will the witness state his name and occupation?" Gen asks.

"PATHETIC FOOLS! You do not know who I am?" Zim screams in fury.

Gen folds her hand into a fist and leans down on the table. "No, we know your name."

"Then why do you wish for me to say it, pig-smelly?"

"BECAUSE IT'S PROCEDURE FOR THE WITNESS TO STATE THEIR NAME AND OCCUPATION!"

"YOUR PROCEDURE IS FOOLISH!"

Enough waffles to swim in randomly fall from the sky.

Gen looses the serious attitude she had just moments before and dives into the waffles with GIR at her side. "I HAVE DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN!"

"I LIKE WAFFLEZ GOOOOOD!"

Dib, back behind the defense table, is utterly confused. "Where did all these come from?"

Tsuki picks up a piece of paper and reads it. "They're from "Invader Cakez", one of our reviewers."

Gen and GIR pop out of the waffle floor. "THANK YOU, CAKEZ! XD" They dive back in and resume eating.

Lard Nar clears his throat again. "Um, prosecutor? What about the witness?"

Gen looks up at Zim who is slowly eating a waffle. "Oh, yeah, right. Witness, tell me your name. NOW."

Zim straightens his back. "Irken Invader Zim reporting."

"You're not really an Invader!" Purple shouts.

"SHUT YOUR PIE-HOLE, BAILIFF!" Gen screams, splashing both Tallests with the Cup of Punishment. "Now, witness, your testimony."

Zim clears his throat. "I was being perfectly normal, DO NOT QUESTION ME!"

"WITNESS…" Gen says, a waffle in one hand and her violent sack of gummy bears in the other.

Zim gulps and continues. "Eh, I was… DOING HOMEWORK like any normal filth-pig when the Dib broke into my base. He blew up the pig first, then I shot a bunch of deadly weapons at him and he died painfully many, many times…"

"OBJECTION!" Lard Nar gestures to Dib. "You didn't kill him, Irken scum. He's still here."

"LIES!" Zim screams.

"OBJECTION!"

"You lie, prosecuting human!"

Gen looks confused. "No, in court you don't say 'lies', you say OBJECTION!"

Tsuki hits Zim with her gavel. "ORDER, STUPID PEOPLE! Now, witness, you will now sing a duet with GIR for the sake of this karaoke fic. Do it or Gaz and I will do violent things that will haunt you for all eternity…"

All the GIR fans clap. "YAY! GIR'S GONNA SING AGAIN!"

**Zim** and _**GIR**_ march/skip like a magical unicorn princess onstage with microphones.

"_**It took a lifetime, but I finally found  
>The perfect waffle recipe<br>You'll never find a batter any better in this whole stinkin' town  
>One little bite and I'm sure that you'll agree<strong>_

**_Your eyes roll back and your knees get weak_**  
><strong><em>Aw, you're gonna lick your plate clean<em>**  
><strong><em>People come from miles around just to study my technique<em>**  
><strong><em>I make the best darn waffles this world has ever seen<em>**

**_I'm the Waffle King (Waffle King)... yeah_**  
>Waffle King (Waffle King)<br>_**That's what they call me  
><strong>_Waffle King(Waffle King)  
><strong>Hey, I'm the Waffle King<strong>

**Everywhere I go, the people cheer  
>I never have to wait in line<br>People say, "Right this way, sir... Your money's no good here.'  
>Some day I betcha they'll build me a shrine<strong>

**And everybody say, "Well, I'm your biggest fan!"**  
><strong>"I seen your picture in People Magazine!"<strong>  
><strong>Folks come from around the world just to shake my hand<strong>

_**If you don't believe in the power of the waffle lemme show you just what I mean**_

I'm the Waffle King (Waffle King)  
><em><strong>Make you want to scream and shout<strong>_  
>Waffle King (Waffle King)<br>**That's my name, don't wear it out  
><strong>Waffle King (Waffle King)  
><strong>Make no mistake about it<strong> I'm the Waffle King..._** yeah**_

**Roll out the red carpet, 'cause here I come  
>All you peons better scram<br>Out of my way, you worthless piece of scum  
>Don't you know who I am?<br>**_**Hey!**_

**I wanna see you grovel, you waffle-eatin' FOOLS!  
>Everybody, on your knees<br>You wanna buy a waffle, you're playin' by my rules  
>Go on, beg me...<strong> _**lemme hear you say "pretty please"**_

**Can't you tell the universe revolves around me?**  
><strong>Don't you know you suckers owe me everything?<strong>  
><strong>And can't you see that I'm the highest form of life that there could ever be?<strong>  
><em><strong>Everybody all around the world, stand up and sing<strong>_  
><em><strong>Come on know...<strong>_

_**Waffle King**_  
><em><strong>Hey, batter batter<strong>_  
><em><strong>Waffle King<strong>_  
><em><strong>Hot on your platter<strong>_  
><em><strong>Waffle King<strong>_

**Say, what's the matter  
>Don't you know who I am?<br>Don't you know who I am?  
>Tell 'em, girls<br>**(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)  
><strong>Yeah yeah<strong>  
>(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)<br>**Tell the truth now  
><strong>(He's the Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Wa Waffle King)  
><strong>Don't you know who I am?<br>Don't you know who I am?**"

APPLAUSE

"I LAIK WAFFLEZ!" screams GIR as he and Gen jump back into the waffle goodness that covers the courtroom.

Tsuki hits Professor Membrane with her gavel. "ORDER! Will the prosecution quit frolicking in the pastries like a juvenile?"

Gen sticks her head out. "Yes, your Honor."

"Good. Witness, continue your testimony."

"FOOLISH JUDGE! I AM THE WAFFLE KING! BOW BEFORE MY WAFFLES!"

"ZIM!"

Zim cowers behind the stand. "Okay, yeesh. Foolish humans, no respect for their waffle king…"

"You aren't the waffle king."

"Fool! I shall give my testimony now."

Lard Nar prepares himself for the cross-examination.

"The Dib killed the stupid pig! I saw him do it! He stabbed it! Poisoned it! Blew it up! WHATEVER IT TAKES TO THROW HIM IN PRISON FOR ALL OF ETERNITY, HE DID IT!"

"OBJECTION!"

Lard Nar's objections are so funny!

The Vortian narrows his eyes annoyedly. "Witness- you did it."

"WHAT? I did not-"

Lard Nar groans. "Play the tape!"

A video tape plays showing Dib and Zim fighting. Dib escapes, and, when GIR has his back turned, Zim takes out a bazooka and blows up the rubber piggy in frustration.

…

"See?" Lard Nar says. "My client is innocent and all Irkens should be thrown in prison or something."

"The prosecution has no objections," Gen says calmly with waffle in her mouth.

Zim turns to her in shock. "Stupid human! I thought you were supposed to prove the Dib-worm guilty!"

Gen puts her hand on her heart. "It is not the role of a prosecutor to find the defendant guilty. It is to find the truth! If the truth is that the defendant is guilty, then so be it. If the truth is that the defendant is innocent, so be it. I am on the side of the truth, and I-"

Tak slaps Gen in the face. "Yeah, yeah, blah blah blah, video game-inspired speech, yadda yadda, get on with the part where Zim goes to prison."

Tsuki hits Dib with the gavel. "Okay. The court finds the defendant, Dib, (sadly) NOT GUILTY. Zim, however, will spend the next five hours in Gen's Elevator of Torture-"

"MAGICAL Elevator of Torture-"

"Yeah, that, even though he and GIR are this chapter's winners. Now, goodnight everybody, while we figure out what we're gonna do with the waffles."

* * *

><p><strong>I don't own "We Are Broken" or "Waffle King". And thank you, Invader Cakez, for the waffles.<strong>


	10. Red vs Purple

Tsuki walks onstage… alone. "Good evening, fanfiction people. Tonight I have some announcements. *clears throat* First of all, from our reviewers: mynamemattersnot wishes to extend her greetings to GIR: she says hi."

"HAI!" GIR shouts happily.

"Oh, GIR, we loves you," Tsuki replies. "Oh, and GirsWaffles22 wishes to say that Dib and GIR are awesome."

Dib raises his arms in victory. "YES! You said I'm awesome!"

"No, a reviewer says you're awesome. I want you to die." Dib slumps. "Also, other members of the IZ cast, like Skoodge, Keef, and MiMi, will be in the studio at times, for all you minor character lovers. Finally, if you're wondering, Gen will not be hosting tonight. Professor Membrane says that she is 'illogical' and wishes to educate her in the ways of science."

Noise is heard coming from another room. "Poor, poor, child! You don't understand!"

"I don't understand? YOU'RE the one who wants me to do COLLEGE LEVEL experiments when I'm in EIGHTH GRADE!"

"You are insane, aren't you?"

"I hate you so much…"

Tsuki stares and clears her throat. "ANYWAY, tonight we have the following matchup… RED VS PURPLE!"

"My Talleeeeeeeeeeeeeest!"

Tsuki walks over and punches Zim in the stomach. "SHUT UP!"

"Now that it's just you hosting tonight, you're going to make our lives miserable, aren't you?" Dib asks.

"Yep!" Tsuki says.

Red walks onstage. "Wait, so you think you can boss us around? Yeah, right!"

Red is randomly attacked by a giant scorpion.

"AAAAHHHHHH!"

Tsuki gives an evil grin. "The HOST POWERS OF DOOM strike again."

GIR comes up with MiMi. "Punchy lady, can we go get waffles now?"

Tsuki turns to the other room. "GEN! WHERE'D YOU PUT THE WAFFLES FROM LAST CHAPTER?"

"IN THE MAGICAL ELEVATOR OF TORTURE!"

"NO! Foolish child, you can't do that! You nearly made this entire laboratory explode!"

"I'M the fool here?"

GIR and MiMi leave to get the waffles while Tsuki pries Red out of the giant scorpion's jaws. "Let's go sing now, tall boy."

Red grabs the MoD.

"You wouldn't believe your eyes  
>You wouldn't believe your ears<br>Out of the dawn skies  
>Suddenly we appeared<br>They wonder why we're here  
>Do they understand<br>Seems we will destroy someone's master plan  
>Looking across the sea<br>Looking across the land  
>Wondering what we'll find<br>Wondering what's at hand  
>Breathing in the air feel the falling rain<br>Getting all prepared for their final day  
>From out of the crimson air<br>Suddenly came the fire  
>Look at the flaming sky<br>See how the flames grow higher  
>Alien your day this not to be<br>All the slaves say let the world be free  
>You wouldn't believe your eyes<br>You wouldn't believe your ears  
>Into the dawning skies<br>Suddenly disappeared  
>Set our course for Mars<br>Leave the world behind  
>Tracking through the stars<br>Finds a different sign."

"Nice. Very… fitting," Tsuki says dully as Red finishes.

Dib jumps up. "See? The alien says that they're going to invade earth! I'm right! I'm not crazy! MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!"

A flaming piano falls on Dib's colossal head.

"I HATE IT WHEN YOU'RE THE ONLY HOST!"

Tsuki gives her signature evil smirk. "I'm glad you do."

From the lab:

"You put it in the wrong place again! Peculiar child, will you ever learn? You're almost as insane as my son!"

"How come you _baka_ people always have to question my sanity? I'm SANE, you _tonma_!"

Dib looks back nervously. "She's breaking out in… what language?"

Tak rolls her eyes. "Japanese."

"Peculiar child, what are you doing now?"

"_Watashi nikumu shigoto suru hataraku to issho ni anata, anata, byo-teki baka!"_

Tak raises her antennae. "I think she's getting the grammar wrong…"

Zim waves his hand. "Filthy humans, what do you expect?"

"_Shizuka ni, kitanai _Irken_- kun!"_

"What did the filth-bag just say?"

Tsuki, who is currently dragging Purple onto the stage, replies, "She told you to shut up and called you filthy."

"WHAT?"

Tsuki hits him with the gavel that she saved from last time. "SHUT. UP. It gets really annoying how I have to tell someone to shut up every time they do something stupid." She glares at Purple. "Now, SING."

Purple folds his arms indignantly (YAY BIG WORD!). "I don't have to. I'm one of the Almighty Tallest. You have no power over me."

GIR suddenly pops up in duty mode with all the missiles and stuff poking out of his head while Tsuki holds up her trusty baseball bat of ultimate PAIN. "Think again."

Purple grabs the MoD and begins to sing.

"Yeah, Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ark)  
>Oo-ooh-ooh, hoo yeah, yeah<br>Yeah, yeah  
>Yeah-ah-ah<br>Yeah-ah-ah  
>Yeah-ah-ah<br>Yeah-ah-ah  
>Yeah, yeah, yeah<p>

Seven a.m., waking up in the morning  
>Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs<br>Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal  
>Seein' everything, the time is goin'<br>Tickin' on and on, everybody's rushin'  
>Gotta get down to the bus stop<br>Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends)

Kickin' in the front seat  
>Sittin' in the back seat<br>Gotta make my mind up  
>Which seat can I take?<p>

It's Friday, Friday  
>Gotta get down on Friday<br>Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend  
>Friday, Friday<br>Gettin' down on Friday  
>Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend<p>

Partyin', partyin' (Yeah)  
>Partyin', partyin' (Yeah)<br>Fun, fun, fun, fun  
>Lookin' forward to the weekend<p>

7:45, we're drivin' on the highway  
>Cruisin' so fast, I want time to fly<br>Fun, fun, think about fun  
>You know what it is<br>I got this, you got this  
>My friend is by my right, ay<br>I got this, you got this  
>Now you know it<p>

Kickin' in the front seat  
>Sittin' in the back seat<br>Gotta make my mind up  
>Which seat can I take?<p>

It's Friday, Fri-"

"OMIGOSH STOP I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! RED WINS! HANDS DOWN!" Tsuki screams with her hands covering her ears.

"What? I didn't choose the song! Your stupid producer or author or whatever told me to!" Pruple shouts.

Tsuki folds her arms. "Yes, but for comedic purposes only. However, because that song is so horrible, you lose automatically."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"This is a fanfic. An insane fanfic where people are put on trial for killing rubber pigs, cartoon characters sing, and reviewers send waffles. It doesn't have to make sense."

While Red gloats in his victory, an explosion is heard from the lab.

"NO! That horrible song made the chemicals explode! Peculiar child, this is all- Peculiar child? Where did you-"

Gen runs onstage wearing a smoking and charred lab coat and fake glasses from Claire's. "FREEDOM!" She jumps on GIR's back and flies away. "FREEEEEDOOOOMMMMMM!"

Tsuki stares. "So, uh, Zim, do you want to close us out?"

"Yes, filth-brain. To all of you pathetic humans reading this, DO NOT REVIEW UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SO THAT WE WILL NOT HAVE TO COME BACK TO THIS HORRIBLE PATHETIC FILTH-RIDDEN PLACE THAT WE ALL HATE! On second thought, the mighty ZIM commands you to make the Dib stay here because he is horrible and stupid and has a big head that is very disturbing."

"My head's not big!"

Zim glares. "DO NOT QUESTION ME! Once again, DON'T MAKE ZIM COME BACK!"

* * *

><p><strong>You all know I really do want you to review. And I don't own any of the songs I have used or will use, (except for the ones written by me! Wink wink hint hint). Thank you all for following this fic!<strong>


	11. The Tallest vs MiMi and Tak

**Woo Hoo! Chapter elebenty! Thank all of you for your reviews! And I finally have a longer chapter!**

**I don't own ANYTHING except the OCs. **

**VEGGIETALES IS EPIC WIN!**

* * *

><p>Gen and Tsuki walk onstage.<p>

"Good evening," Tsuki says calmly. "Welcome to the eleventh chapter of IZSC. Earlier today, we played Truth or Dare. As a result, everyone here will be revealing one truth and doing one dare over the course of this chapter."

Zim enters without his disguise and a black t-shirt that reads "I AM AN ALIEN".

Gen grins. "Dib-kun dared him to wear this for the entire chapter," she says in a British accent.

Tsuki lets off an air of EEEVIIILLL as she says, "And Dib got dared twice. Gaz got off free because she scares almost everyone here."

Dib looks onto the stage. ":("

"Tak dared him to speak only in emoticons for the rest of the chapter."

Gen is still grinning. "Tonight's matchup is… the Tallest vs. Tak and MiMi!"

MiMi and GIR are huggin' each other. "You sing good, 'kay, MiMi?" GIR says.

MiMi nods.

Gen squeals. "YAY IT'S GAMR!"

Zim glares at her. "Why are you stupid and filthy enough to pronounce the acronym?"

"BECAUSE I LIKE TO!"

Tak, wearing a dress as her dare stated, runs onstage. "What was her dare, again?"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Her dare was to wear a suit and talk in a British accent."

"Lucky. She got dared by GIR."

"Who cares? Some of us come up with evil, evil dares."

Tak grins. "And what did Gen dare you to do?"

"…"

Gen smiles. "Go do it, Tsuki-chan."

Tsuki skips around the stage and sings.

"Oh when you're down and looking for some cheering up  
>Then just head right on up to the candy mountain cave<br>When you get inside you'll find yourself a cheery land  
>Such a happy and joy filled and perky merry land<br>They've got lollipops and gummidrops and candy things  
>Oh so many things that will brighten up your day<br>Its impossible to wear a frown in candy town  
>Its the mecca of love the candy cave<br>They've got jellybeans and coconuts with little hats  
>Candy rats, chocolate bats, it's a wonderland of sweets<br>Ride the candy train to town and hear the candy band  
>Candy bells, it's a treat, as they march across the land<br>Cherry ribbons stream across the sky and to the ground  
>Turn around, it astounds, it's a dancing candy tree<br>In the candy cave imagination runs so free  
>So now Charlie please will you go into the cave?"<p>

She stops skipping as soon as she finishes the last note and stomps back over. "There. Happy now?"

Gen and GIR grin. "Yes. Now, time for user shoutouts!" Gen picks up the paper. Okayz… First, HayaMika says to Zimmeh-kun and Dibbeh-kun: 'I love you both! You are forever my faves!"

Zim raises his arms in victory once again. "YES! Thank you, I truly deserve another slave."

"Zimmeh-kun? The reviewers aren't slaves-"

"SLAVE! THROW HER IN THE DUNGEON!"

Gen hits Zim with a large sack of gummy bears. "STOP! IT! RIGHT! NOW!"

"Fine, fine, OW! Whatever."

"Okay. Next is from TimIsaFunSucker. She send GIR and MiMi… Spaghetti taco waffles and spaghetti pizza!" She hands them their food.

"YAAAAY!"

"GIR! Do not take food from the humans!"

Zim is once again hit with a large sack of gummy bears.

Tsuki grabs the paper. "This is my job. Next, mynamemattersnot is giving me and Gen cookies."

"DX…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, be all disappointed, emoticon boy."

Gen looks at the paper. "GIR-kun! She's really happy you said hi to her! Go give 'er a hug!"

"OKAY!" Gir runs out the door.

Gen reads over Tsuki's shoulder. "Oooh. Somebody doesn't like it when you hit Zimmeh-kun with a gavel."

"But someone DOES like my baseball bat of ultimate PAIN, which I will hit you with if you don't go and spout your fake British accent somewhere else."

Gen walks away…

"And Invader Zoe sends tacos and… waffles."

"YAY WAFFLES!" Gen smiles as a giant stack of waffles and a giant stack of tacos come out on a silver platter.

"T.T"

"And finally, Invader Kat 27-"

'TWENTY-SEVEN'S MAH FAVORITE NUMBAH!"

"O.o"

"Um, yeah… she says, 'Hi, Lard Nar, you're my favorite! You're awesome!'"

Lard Nar fistpumps. "Join us and destroy the Irken emipire!"

Gen copies him. "YEAH, RESISTY!"

Tsuki pushes everyone off the stage. You do realize we just used up 715 words of this chapter without actually starting the competition, right? So TALL BOYS GET UP HERE AND SING BEFORE I GET ALL HAPPY WITH MY BAT ON YOUR FACES."

The Tallest grab the microphone hastily.

"Now that we're men, we can do anything  
>Now that we're men, we are invincible<br>Now that we're men, we'll go to shell city  
>Get the crown, save the town and Mr. Krabs<br>Now that we're men, we have facial hair  
>Now that we're men, I change my underwear<br>Now that we're men, we got a manly flair  
>We got the stuff, we're tough enough to save the day<br>We never had a chance when we were kids, no no no  
>But take a look at what we've already did, ha ha ha<p>

Now that they're men, we can't bother them  
>Now that they're men, they have become our friends<br>Now that they're men, there'll be a happy end  
>They'll pass the test, and finish the quest for the crown<br>They'll pass the test  
>And finish the quest<br>They'll pass the test, and finish the quest for the crown!"

APPLAUSE

Gen marches in place and is still humming.

"So theys is men now?" GIR asks in an adorably ignorant way.

MiMi makes a few beeping noises, and GIR giggles.

Tsuki takes the stage. "Nice work. But now, it's time for the Truth portion of our game of Truth or Dare. Everyone will go inside the Magical Elevator of Torture and answer their question."

DIB

"T.T"

"Oh, yeah, he can't answer because of the whole emoticon thing."

"Yes he can. Look: Is it true you still sleep with Mr. Sparkles?"

"T.T'"

"It's true."

TAK

"How did I get MiMi? Well, I used scrap metal and parts from planet Dirt and constructed her myself. She's very useful, when she's not with that defect SIR of another defect…"

GAZ

"I've beaten 123 different games. Now, leave me alone."

GIR

"I love MiMi reeeeeeealll good! I loves her like I loves tacos!"

"VICTORY FOR GAMR!"

ZIM

"I am not in love with Tak! I hate her! Yes, hate her very much, with every cell in my SUPERIOR being!"

"We all know you love her, _Kitanai Irken-kun_."

"SILENCE!"

"Which translates into 'You're right but I don't want to admit it.''

"No it- OW! OW AUGH! STUPID GUMMY BEARS!"

TSUKI

"Well, I hate Dib because he applies to the following: annoying, ugly, big-headed, stupid, insane, nerdy…"

"T.T"

"Would it kill you to stop hating him?"

"Yes."

GEN

"No, I am not insane! IS EVERYONE GOING TO ASK THAT? I'm not insane or an idiot! I'm a straight-A student!"

"You LIE!"

"_Suisoku dare ga sozo suru waffuru?_"

"What are you- NOT THE GUMMY BEARS!"

…

Back in the studio, everyone (including a heavily bruised Zim) stand around Dib expectantly.

"Well?" Gaz says almost eagerly. "You still have a dare to do."

Dib gulps.

"Do it."

Dib walks out of the room, comes back with Tsuki's copy of Twilight, and slowly rips out one of the pages.

Tsuki's skin is red with anger and looks like she's about to explode.

"O.O'"

Gen looks around nervously. "Imma go get the censor-thingy…"

"#$&%* &$#&%$#* &#*($^($^H^(^(^($#^V &#(&$^#%%&# *&###*^$(#^& %&#(&^( ^#( ^(# #^(%6 #(6 (!"

Within two seconds Dib is being dragged out by Tsuki. "Gen, cover for me while I make him wish HE HAD NEVER BEEN BORN!"

"Um… uh… TIME FOR A TWILIGHT PARODY!" Gen runs out of the room and comes back with puppets. "**Lookit me I'm Edward.**_Look at me I'm Bella__**.**_** I love you, Bella.**_ I love you, too, Edward, but I'm not sure if I love Jacob…_ Hey I'm Jacob I'm a freak who NEVER WEARS MY SHIRT! **Stay away from Bella! **You stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella!** Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! **Stay away from Bella! _I can't decide!_ Choose me, Bella! I'm soooooo preeetttyyyyy! **No, Bella, pick me! I'm SPARKLY!**_Bite me and turn me into a vampire, Edgeworth- I mean Edward!_** I can't cuz I might hurt you-**_JUST DO IT!_"

Tak rolls her eyes. "This is getting old…"

GIR smiles. "I LIKE IT!"

"Well, what else am I supposed to do? Wait, that's it!"

"YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET THE GUMMY BEARS AGAIN, RIGHT?"

Gen laughs. "No, kitanai Irken-kun. GIR AND I ARE GONNA SING!"

"What song?"

GIR laughs like a maniac.

_And now it's time for Schoolhouse Polka with Gen and GIR: The sick and twisted part of IZSC where Gen and GIR come out and sing a schoolhouse polka._

Gen and GIR walk onstage with accordions.

"Whether, whether, whether, whether  
>Whether you like it or not<br>Weather, weather, weather, weather  
>Weather is cold, warm and hot.<p>

Two, two, two, two  
>Two of my favorite toys<br>I'm bringing to, to, to, to  
>A place the first one enjoys…<br>and I like it, too!

Homophones! Homophones!  
>Where the crews come cruising down the plane!<br>Homophones! Homophones!  
>I need my kneaded biscuits plain!<p>

I know a pear, pear, pear, pear  
>With a pair of really soft shoes.<br>He wears them to pare, pare, pare, pare  
>Bushes that easily bruise.<p>

I planted rows, rows, rows, rows  
>of a horribly bad smelling rose<br>Now no one knows, knows, knows, knows  
>If the scent will be leaving my nose!<br>But most likely no."

Gen and GIR start playing their accordions like electric guitars in various ridiculous poses.

"Oh!  
>Homophones! Homophones!<br>Where the toads are towed out on the plane!  
>Homophones! Homophones!<br>I need my kneaded biscuits plain!

Whether, whether, whether, whether,  
>Whether you like it or not<br>Weather, weather, weather, weather  
>Weather is cold, warm and hot!"<p>

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO?" shout the Tallest.

"EVERYTHING!"

Tsuki comes back in dragging Dib by his leg. He is unconscious. "We are never playing Truth or Dare again."

"But-"

"NEVER. Now, Tak, MiMi, hurry up so that we can go home."

GIR hands her one of the cookies. "You want one?"

"Aww… I can't stay mad with you, GIR!"

"-.-"

Zim grabs Gen's gummy bears and attempts to knock Dib unconscious again.

Gen subsequently grabs them back and beats Zim silly.

Tak and MiMi grab the microphones and sing.

"_Untouchable like a distant diamond sky  
>I'm reaching out and I just can't tell you why<br>I'm caught up in you, I'm caught up in you_

Untouchable, burning brighter than the sun  
>And when you're close, I feel like coming undone<p>

In the middle of the night when I'm in this dream  
>It's like a million little stars spelling out your name<br>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together  
>Come on, come on, little taste of heaven<p>

**It's half full and I won't wait here all day  
>I know you're saying that you'd be here anyway<br>But you're untouchable, burning brighter than the sun  
>Now that you're close, I feel like coming undone<strong>

In the middle of the night when I'm in this dream  
>It's like a million little stars spelling out your name<br>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together  
>Come on, come on, oh<p>

In the middle of the night waking from this dream  
>I wanna feel you by my side, standing next to me<br>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together  
>Come on, come on, little taste of heaven<p>

_I'm caught up in you,  
>Oh, oh, oh<em>

**But your untouchable, burning brighter than the sun  
>Now that you're close, I feel like coming undone<br>**  
>In the middle of the night when I'm in this dream<br>It's like a million little stars spelling out your name  
>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together<br>**Come on,**_ come on, oh  
><em>  
>In the middle of the night when I'm in this dream<br>It's like a million little stars spelling out your name  
>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together<br>Come on, come on, come on

In the middle of the night waking from this dream  
>I wanna feel you by my side, standing next to me<br>You gotta come on, come on, say that we'll be together  
>Come on, come on, little taste of heaven<p>

And in the middle of the night when I'm in this dream  
>It's like a million little stars spelling out your name<br>You gotta come on, come on, come on, come on  
>Come on, come on, oh, oh, oh<p>

_Like a million little stars spelling out your name  
>They're spelling out your name, oh<em>."

Zim sticks out his chest with pride. "Yes, Tak, I know you can't resist the MIGHTY ZIM!"

Tak slaps him across his face. "In your dreams."

"Zim was… eh… kidding! To entertain the Tallest!"

"Riiiiiiiggghhhttt…"

Zim does not attempt to yell at Gen for fear of the gummy bear sack.

MiMi smiles at GIR. YAY DA GAMR IS SO AWESOME!

Tsuki grabs the MoD. "Okay, we haven't done a real vote in three chapters. GRAB THE BALLOTS!"

Everyone votes, just like ol' times.

Tsuki takes the stage one last time. "Tonight, our special guest is… Rei Griffin?"

A brunette girl with blue eyes and a black suit takes the stage. "Hi!"

Gen screams. "FINALLY! ANOTHER OC!"

Rei takes the winners' envelope. "Tonight, we've heard Red and Purple sing 'Now That We're Men' from the SpongeBob SquarePants movie and Tak and MiMi singing 'Untouchable' by Taylor Swift. And the winners are… THE TALLEST!"

Red and Purple come onstage and do a victory dance. Finally, they won something.

GIR comforts MiMi and Zim purposefully avoids Tak. "It be okay, MiMi! You did reeeeeallll good!"

"WAIT!" Tak says. "GIR didn't do his dare yet."

"OKAY!" GIR takes out a cupcake and eats it.

…

…

…

"What, is that it?"

Tsuki grins in a not evil way for once. "Yep. I dared GIR to eat a cupcake."

" "

"Dibbeh-kun, no one gave you a pleasant dare because you're just one of those characters that are really fun to torture. Plus, Tak and Gaz hate you. But I don't hate you! And neither do many watchers of Invader Zim!"

"DX"

"XD Well, come back next time on IZSC for more madness and violent gummy bear usage!"

"NOOOOOOOOO-"

CHAPTER TWELVE


	12. Zim vs GIR

**Hello, people! Thanks so much: this is my most-reviewed story! I'd love it if you guys read some of my other fics. Anyway, THANK YOU! Please R & R and- Hey, what are you doing? No, don't touch that! AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH Z-**

* * *

><p>MUA HA HA HA HA! Zim has taken over this pathetic excuse for a fanfic! Zim is ruler now!<p>

Dib runs onstage. "YOU! How did you-"

"Oh, THIS will be fun, Dib-monkey," I say with all my amazingness.

Tak runs onstage. "Zim, when this is over I'm gonna-"

Tak suddenly realizes just how MIGHTY THE IRKEN INVADER ZIM is and falls madly in love with me.

Tsuk races onstage with her baseball bat of ultimate PAIN. "Zim. Put down the laptop and I won't get Gaz in here to help me destroy you."

A giant MOOSE OF DOOM appears behind Tsuki. She looks back. "Are you serious? I can think of 789,563,278 things scarier than a stupid moose."

Tak stands in front of ZIM THE INCREDILBE IRKEN INVADER. "You will not harm Zim! He is much more amazing then you!"

Gen crashes through the wall on her white and purple motorcycle. "KITANAI IRKEN-KUN! You and GIR are supposed to face off tonight!"

GIR, in duty mode, stands in front of me. "INTRUDERS!"

"GIR-kun! What do you mean? We're the hosts! It's our studio!"

ZIM stands victoriously. "I have conquered this revolting pile of dirt!"

Tsuki grabs a fish. "This is from a reviewer. I'm supposed to beat you with it. So stop playing your little game and I MIGHT go easy on the also requested BASEBALL BAT BEATING." She hits Dib with her bat. "There. Halfway done."

"Why do you hate-"

Dib suddenly is swallowed by the giant scorpion from chapter ten.

"DIBBEH-KUN! NOOOOOOOO! WHY? WHY MY DIBBEH? I LOVEDED YOU, DIBBEH! I LOVEDED YOOOOUUUUU!" Gen howls like a maniac. "ZIMMEH! YOU WENT TOO FAR!" She holds up her sack of gummy bears. "YOU WANNA GET GUMMEH BEAR-ED?"

I snort and pull out my own gummy bear sack. "Thank your reviewers for this, too!"

Gen reads the reviews. "Aw, dangit! You get to hit anyone you- hey! Somebody sent Dib a cookie!"

The giant scorpion holds out Dib, who is still alive, with its tongue (I don't think scorpions have tongues or mouths but whatever). Gen smiles and skips over, hands him his cookie, and he gets swallowed again.

What is wrong with this fic?

Tsuki watches as Gen and I engage in an epic gummy bear battle. She turns to Tak. "What is wrong with Zim?"

"Nothing! I love him!"

"Seriously, Zim, GIVE ME THE LAPTOP."

Wait, if I'm writing this, how come you can still not speak of my amazingness?

"Because, you don't tell me what to do. And since this is still the Invader Zim SINGING Challenge, grab a microphone and sing. I'm still supposed to beat you with the fish…"

Tak runs over to me. "Win for me, Zim! You're so awesome, you can do it!"

Gen hits Tak with the gummy bears. "PUT HER BACK TO NORMAL! She's totally OOC!"

Gen is hit with a meteor.

"I'm okay! … Ow."

Invader Zim takes the MoZ-

"Microphone of Zim? SERIOUSLY?"

"Giant scorpion, swallow the Dib again!"

Dib is swallowed for the third time.

Invader Zim takes the MoZ and starts to sing.

"I think it's time for me to go now  
>I've done more harm than good<br>If I could change how this turned out, yeah  
>You know that I would<br>Sometimes the weight is more than I can hold  
>But I rather fail than not know<p>

If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>I will die trying

I wish I knew then what I know now  
>But I'd probably do the same<br>I get the feeling that it's planned out  
>From the cradle to the grave<br>Sometimes the weight is more than I can hold  
>But I rather fail than never really know<p>

If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>I will die trying

And I am digging a hole  
>I am taking it all<br>I am digging a hole  
>To bury my soul<br>I am digging

If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<p>

If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<p>

If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<br>If it takes forever  
>I will die trying<p>

If it takes forever (forever)  
>I will die trying<br>If it takes forever (forever)  
>I will die trying<br>I will die trying  
>I will die trying."<p>

Gen applauds. "THAT WAS EPIC!"

I grin with my INGENIOUS EVIL! "Yes! The Gen-human is under my control!"

"No, I just thought that was epic. X3"

"Stop making that face, it's creepy."

"What? You mean this, Zimmeh-kun? X3"

"Yes! Stop it!"

"X3 X3 X3 X3"

Gen hits me with her gummy bears.

"AGH!"

The scorpion spits up Dib because he tastes horrible and big-head-ish. "Zim! I WILL STOP YOU!"

"HA! As if you'll ever get past my amazing SIR unit, who will maktorehwtj vnsioghvofiavnhoaivnaifvn hdsiavvng fakjvgbhjkahgwsdefhmjhkjsjfg vugfdiovbuogfy9lxod,mlckds

Tsuki looks around. "What just happened?"

I march proudly onstage. "Nothing. Just an- eh, technical error. Now, where were we?"

GIR watches as the Dib-worm runs away, trying to escape.

"Wait, wasn't GIR in duty mode?" I say tremendously.

"He was…"

"Whatever! Now, Dib-smelly," I say in all of my incredibleness. "Time for what I've been waiting for…"

I pull out laser guns and shoot them at Dib. They all hit him and he falls to the ground, where he blubbers on his sad little filthy human back and begs for mercy because I am so remarkable. But clemency is not shown to him, and I use my Pak's legs to injure him in a very painful manner.

Tsuki walks over and smiles. "No, don't stop. This is the only goos thing about you running the fic."

"WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO EVIL, TSUKI-CHAN?" Gen shouts. Her mouth is magically Duct-taped shut. GIR's, too.

"MMPH! MPH MMPH MMMMPH!"

TRANSLATION: No! Not again!

Tsuki laughs mockingly for a moment, then stops. "Wait- Don't tape GIR's mouth shut! He still needs to sing PLUS HE'S WAY MORE EPIC THAN YOU!"

I roll my eyes. "LIES!"

"MMPH!"

"Silence, tape-mouthed human!"

"T_T"

Gen hits me with gummy bears- WAIT! THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!

"Mmmph mph? Mmph mmph mph mmmmmph mmph mph mph mmph."

Dib crawls onstage. "Do we even want the translation?"

I turn to him. "Aren't you supposed to be dead?"

Dib is swallowed by the scorpion for the third time.

Tsuki wipes a tear from her eye. "YAAYY! This is the best day of my life! I'm…I'm… I'M SO HAPPEH!"

Gen facepalms. "Mmph mph mpph mphmphmph?"

I forcefully rip the duct tape from the filthy Gen-human's mouth of dirt.

"OOOOOOWWWWWWIIIIEEEEEEE!"

"AH HAHAHAH HA HA!"

Tsuki smiles. "Even better! Now, GIR, sing!"

GIR takes the MoZ and walks onto the stage in his MIGHTY ROBOT-NESS!

"(spoken) Got the munchies on that fateful night, round eight 'o clock. So I phoned in a pizza for delivery. But I had a feeling that something wasn't right, 'cause I waited for hours and...no pizza.

(sung) I set the table with a paper plate  
>How would I know that it'd be late?<br>It's taken so long, where could it be?  
>Had a thirty minute guarantee<p>

Pizza Angel, please come to me  
>Tomato sauce, and cheese so gooey<br>Pizza Angel, I'm on my knees  
>You're my number one pie from Sicily!<p>

Did it get lost?  
>Did they just forget?<br>Should I have ordered on the internet?  
>Ready for dinner, now I'm not so sure<br>I think my soda's room temperature

Pizza Angel, please come to me Tomato sauce, and cheese so gooey  
>Pizza Angel, I'm on my knees<br>And don't forget to add my favorite anchovies!

I was concerned for my delivery  
>Eight little slices of heaven for me<br>Can't stop thinking it would make me smile  
>When I taste my first Chicago style<br>Going crazy while I pace the floor  
>Then my heart skipped<br>When I heard the door!

(spoken) I opened the door in expectation, but it was the saddest sight I ever saw. I could still smell the sweet aroma of deep dish goodness...but the box was empty.

(Random pizza guy comes in and speaks)The house number was broken, so I couldn't find you. I was getting kind of hungry so I...ate your pizza. Sorry about that. You don't need to tip me or anything. (he leaves)

(GIR sung)Pizza Angel, please come to me  
>Tomato sauce, and cheese so gooey<br>Pizza Angel, I'm on my knees

Pizza Angels: On my knees!

Larry: You'll live forever in my memory!  
>Pizza Angel, please come to me<br>Tomato sauce, and cheese so gooey  
>Pizza Angel, I'm on my knees<br>I will miss you for eternity!

(spoken): I'll never forget you, Pizza Angel.

ROARING APPLAUSE

Gen glomps GIR. "I LOVE VEGGIETAAAAALES! THAT WAS GREAT!"

Tsuki smiles. "GIR, You're so cute!"

"I am!"GIR says cheekily.

I step out and hit Gen with gummy bears. "SILENCE! The winner shall be chosen now!"

Everyone votes.

I stand proudly as Tak begs for my hand in marriage. "The winner and ultimate champion is… ME! THE AMAZING ZIM! ALL SHALL TREMBLE ngnkvsdhnf nfdiosdhrd bofgijslgbfds ngsaoif AAAAAAHHHHHHH GET AWAYjkpgthr ghjlnkstdlcm aslpd;komfbh ;sladkfucpw[qp9rkn 6666666 fovgjporelisvth;'pb opfjwqeshge fjidwjorh edgeworthrocks jjkngfl fkelasdcjf kfjsfndg!

Zim goes into the Magical Elevator of Torture where he is punished for hijacking the fic. The giant scorpion spits Dib, who is still alive, out of his mouth. Tak comes out of the spell Zim used his ability as author to cast on her, goes into the elevator, and MAKES HIM SUFFER. Tsuki folds her arms irritably at the fact that Dib did not die.

Gen runs around with a cupcake. "WHEEEE! EVERYTHING'S BACK TO AS CLOSE TO NORMAL AS IT CAN GET IN THIS CRAZY THANG!" she noms her cuppycake. "Plus we got reviewer gifts!"

GIR holds up a cupcake to Tsuki. "You wannit, Punchy Lady? Mebbe it'll make you feel better!"

"Ngh..."

"One of da peoples gave it to yooouuu…"

"Fine." She takes the cupcake. "You know I can't resist you. Or sugar."

GIR happily noms his own cupcake while sounds come from the elevator.

"NOOO! AGH! Wait- Tak, what are you AAAHHHHHHH!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

…

"Lucky Tak…"

Gaz picks up the envelope containing the name of the REAL winner. "The annoying robot wins."

"YAYZ!" GIR walks up to the camera. "I gotta go, peoples! We see ya later!"


	13. GIR and MiMi vs the Tallest

**I've got a new IZ fic up! It's called 'New Generations' and is central on a couple of OCs. NOT MARYSUES. I'm not going to give too much away here, but I'd love it if you guys would read it! ...Pretty please?**

**I don't own Charlie the Unicorn. But man is it awesome.**

* * *

><p>Tsuki is violently beating Zim with a large fish.<p>

"OW! OW AHH! STOP IT! FILTHY HU-OW!"

Gen, GIR, and Dib walk onstage with… ICE CREAM!

Dib's eyes widen. "What is-"

Gen shoves a waffle in his mouth. "SILENCE! A reviewer says if you don't talk or use emoticons for the entire chappy, you get sugar cookies and a Hershey pie!"

"But I don't ca-"

She giggles. "And if you do talk, you're gonna get bitten by a king cobra."

"…"

Tsuki drags an unconscious Zim over. "He doesn't get to talk? XD"

Gen looks at Zim. "NOOOOOOZIM!"

Zim sits up and laughs at Dib's expense.

"ZIM! BE NICE TO DIBBEH!"

Gaz throws a lemon at Gen. "Will you pick a side already?"

"NEVAR. And besides, you're kinda neutral..."

Tak rolls her eyes. "I hate both of them."

MiMi smiles and huggles GIR, who says, "We gonna sing tonight, right? WE SINGZ GOOD!"

Gen smiles. "Yes, yes, you do. And tonight's matchup is… GIR AND MIMI VS THE TALLEST!"

The Tallest try to escape, but they stop in their tracks when Tsuki beats her baseball bat against her hand in a threatening manner. "Your pain will be lessened if you stay…"

_The Invader Zim Singing Challenge will be back after this commercial break!_

_Bug spray! This handy bottle of nothing but chemicals will stop wasps and horrible, disgusting parasites from biting you, stinging you, or sucking your poor, sad little blood! So waste no time in buying it- AAAAAHHHHHH NOT THE WOLVERINES AGAIN AAHHHHHHHHHH-_

_*Different announcer* Now back to the show!_

"Dibbeh!"

"Biggeh head!"

"Dibbeh! Dibbeh!"

"Bighead boy! Biggy heeeaaadd? Biggyhead boooyyyyy? Guess what?"

"…?"

Gen and GIR give off epic smiley faces. "WE'RE GOING TO CANDY MOUNTAIN!"

They grab Dib and run off happily.

Tsuki and Tak burst out laughing at this hilarious form of torture. "HAHA- The- BWA HA HA HA- Tallest sing- HH AH AHHAH –now BWAHAHAHEHAHA!"

The Tallest begrudgingly take the stage.

"Buddy you're a boy make a big noise  
>Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day<br>You got mud on yo' face  
>You big disgrace<br>Kickin' your can all over the place

We will  
>we will rock you<br>We will  
>we will rock you<p>

Buddy you're a young hard man  
>Shoutin' in the street gonna take on the world some day<br>You got blood on yo' face  
>You big disgrace<br>Wavin' your banner all over the place

We will  
>we will rock you<p>

Singin'

We will  
>we will rock you<p>

Buddy you're an old poor man  
>Pleadin' with your eyes gonna make you some peace some<br>day  
>You got mud on your face<br>You big disgrace  
>Somebody better put you back in yo' place<p>

We will  
>we will rock you<p>

cos'  
>We will<br>we will rock you

everybody

We will  
>we will rock you<p>

We will  
>we will rock you."<p>

"Wow. It's not every chapter you see a duet sing in unison the whole time."

"Shut your mouth, inferior species!" Purple snaps.

"You have no power when compared to u-" Red tries to make a comeback to Tsuki, but she grabs them both and drags them out of the room with her baseball bat of ultimate PAIN.

"Really, how many times have we been over this, you two idiots? Gen, cover for me again!"

Gen and GIR are surrounding Zim and Dib. "You guys look saaaad," Gen says.

GIR looks up happily. "I know what we gonna do!"

They smile and begin to…sing!

"Zimmy you look quite down  
>With your big sad eyes<br>And your big fat frown  
>The world doesn't have to be so gray<br>Dibby when your life's a mess  
>When you're feeling blue<br>Always in distress  
>I know what can wash that sad away<br>All you have to do is  
>Put a banana in your ear<br>Put a ripe banana right into your favorite ear  
>It's true<br>So true  
>Once it's in your gloom will disappear<br>The bad in the world is hard to hear  
>When in your ear a banana cheers<br>So go and put a banana in your ear  
>Put a banana in your ear<br>You will ne'er be happy  
>If you live your life in fear<br>It's true  
>So true<br>When it's in the skies are bright and clear  
>Oh, every day of every year<br>The sun shines bright in this big blue sphere  
>So go and put a banana in your<br>Eaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

"GIR! FOOLISH GEN-HUMAN! Cease this horrible noise! It's all lies, LIES! The Dib will never be happy because no one likes him!"

_Gen_ pouts momentarily. "I like him. In fact… **GIR**, you know what I mean, right?"

"Yep…"

"**When you're feeling all alone  
>The world's a drone<br>And nobody's shown any love to you**

_When your heart is cold as stone  
>Just change your tone<br>Get rid of that groan and the world will too  
><em>  
><em>'cause swordfishes<em>, **love you**  
><em>Jellyfishes,<em> **love you  
><strong>_Starfish_**, I LOVE YOU**  
><em>You know it's true<br>_**Catfishes**, _love you_  
><strong>Cuddlefishes<strong>_, love you_  
><strong>Blowfish-<strong>, _STARFISH REALLY LOVES YOU  
>In the ocean blue<em>

[Rap]  
><strong>Lungfish, blackfish, alligator, icefish<br>Armorhead, hammerhead, anaconda, flathead  
>Manta ray, sting ray, fangtooth moray<br>Goblin shark, grass carp, round river bat ray**

Noodlefish, hagfish, man o' war, ladyfish  
>Black eel, baby seal, sprat, koi, electric eel<br>Lamprey, pejeray, yellow-edged moray  
>Salmon shark, sleeper shark, featherback and eagle ray<p>

_Well, you can ignore this plea  
>That's fine with me<br>But one day you'll see that my words are true  
>and if you find that you agree<br>I guarantee  
>That you will soon be feeling the love too<em>

'cause swordfishes

, **love you**  
><em>Jellyfishes,<em> **love you**  
><em>Starfish<em>, **I WANT TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER**  
><em>You know it's true<em>  
><strong>Catfishes,<strong> _love you_  
><strong>Cuddlefishes<strong>_, love you_  
><strong>Blowfish-<strong>, _STARFISH LOVE ME LOVE ME_  
><span>In the ocean blue<span>!"

When Tsuki returns with the very sad and hurt Tallest to see Zim and Dib crumpled on the floor covering their ears from Charlie the Unicorn song overload.

A starfish randomly falls out of the sky and hits Zim on the head.

"OW! What was that for?" he shrieks.

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "I think SOMEBODY is watching Bad, Bad, Rubber Piggy while she's writing this and since you kinda kill the bighead in that one… yeah."

"Fangirls are horrible, but the ones who don't choose sides are even more confusing," Tak says. "You poor, unfortunate boys."

Gen laughs. "Yeah, we fangirls are an interesting species."

"STARFISH LOVES YOU SO MUCH!" shouts the starfish Zim peels off of his face. He throws it into the Magical Elevator of Torture.

Tak blinks. "I will never understand this fanfic."

"Rightly so," Tsuki says. "Now, _MiMi_, **GIR**_**, **_time to sing!"

The two little SIRs take the stage, each with a microphone.

"_I was riding shotgun with my hair undone  
>In the front seat of his car<br>He's got a one-hand feel on the steering wheel  
>The other on my heart<em>

I look around, turn the radio down  
>He says,<p>

**MiMi is something wrong**_?  
>I say, Nothing I was just thinking<br>How we don't have a song? and he says  
><em>**  
>Our song is the slamming screen door<br>Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window  
>When we're on the phone and you talk real slow<br>'Cause it's late and your mama don't know**

Our song is the way you laugh  
>The first date man, I didn't kiss her and I should have<br>And when I got home, 'fore I said amen  
>Asking God if He could play it again<p>

**I was walking up the front porch steps  
>After everything that day<br>Had gone all wrong or been trampled on  
>And lost and thrown away<strong>

Got to the hallway, well, on my way  
>To my lovin' bed<br>I almost didn't notice all the roses  
>And the note that said<p>

Our song is the slamming screen door  
>Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window<br>When we're on the phone and you talk real slow  
>'Cause it's late and your mama don't know<p>

Our song is the way you laugh  
>The first date man, I didn't kiss her and I should have<br>And when I got home, 'fore I said amen  
>Asking God if He could play it again<p>

_I've heard every album, listened to the radio  
>Waited for something to come along<br>That was as good as our song_

'Cause our song is the slamming screen door  
>Sneakin' out late, tapping on his window<br>When we're on the phone and he talks real slow  
>'Cause it's late and his mama don't know<p>

Our song is the way he laughs  
>The first date man, I didn't kiss him and I should have<p>

And when I got home, 'fore I said amen  
>Asking God if He could play it again<br>Play it again, oh, yeah, **oh, oh, yeah**

I was riding shotgun with my hair undone  
>In the front seat of his car<br>I grabbed a pen and an old napkin  
>And I wrote down our song<p>

."

"!" Gen shouts in fangirliness.

Tsuki hums to the song 'cause it's awesome.

Zim glares at his robot angrily. "GIR! Stop singing and making kissy-faces with Tak's SIR!"

"But mastah, MiMi be mah girlfriend!"

"WHAT?"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Gen squeals as Tsuki shoves her in a closet.

Tak slaps herself in the face. "This is just crazy…"

GIR kisses MiMi on the cheek. MiMi giggles.

Dib opens his mouth to ask how MiMi can sing and giggle but not talk when Tsuki smiles enthusiastically.

"Yes! Say something, Bighead! GET BITTTEN BY THAT COBRA!"

Dib shuts his mouth.

Gen breaks out of the closet. "I'm getting kinda tired of torturing him. I like Dib."

"I don't."

"The Dib-monkey deserves torture."

"He's stupid."

"Yeah, pretty much."

Gen hugs Dib silently.

Tsuki laughs with contempt. "Okay, let's vote. (Not that I don't know who's gonna win.)"

THE VOTING HAPPENS!

Tsuki takes the stage. "Tonight's guest is… Keef?"

Keef marches in. "Zim! Hiya, buddy! Oh my golly we'regonnahavesuchagoodtimehere! I've got a ton of stuffplannedandIjustcan'twaittoplaywithmybuddy!-"

"FOR THE LOVE OF MOUNTAIN DEW SHUT UP!" Tsuki shouts, slapping Keef in the face. "Just tell us who won the stupid contest!"

"Okay!" He giggles.

Tak shudders. "It sounds so wrong when a dude giggles like that…"

"Anyway, the winners are GIR and MiMi!"

The two little robots hug as Gen screams like a fangirlish maniac.

Tsuki glares at Dib. "It's time to close out and DANGIT DIB DIDN'T TALK." She throws sugar cookies and pie at him. "There's your prize."

Dib smirks.

"We'll see you next chapter… Grrrrr…"


	14. Zim vs Gaz

**I'm ba-ack! Thaks again for all the reviews that made me really happy when I got up one morning and checked my inbox! **

**I don't own Tsubasa Chronicle, BUT I LOVE IT! (In case you haven't figured it out, I let my inner fangirl out with Gen's little rants.) There are Japanese suffixes for names in here, so please don't get confused.**

* * *

><p>"Hello and welcome back to the Invader Zim Singing Challenge!" Tsuki announces proudly.<p>

"SAYORAN AND SAKURA WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER!" Gen shouts.

…

"What is it this time?" Dib asks.

Tsuki slaps him with an electric swordfish. "Tsubasa Chronicle by CLAMP. And the swordfish thing is another reviewer request. Prepare to be hit with it every time you talk.

Gen suddenly looks up. "Y'know what? I'm tired of torturing Dib-kun."

Zim leaps from his seat. "BEAT THE GEN WITH THE GISH OF POINTINESS!"

Gen hits Zim with the gummy bear sack. "SILENCE, ZIM-KUN! DO NOT MAKE ME GO ALL NINJA ON YOUR SORRY GREEN FACE!"

Dib's eyes widen. "And she likes him?"

Tsuki hits him with the ESOP (electric swordfish of pain). "Yeah. I don't understand either."

Gen suddenly goes into the corner. "WHY PHOENIX? WHYYYYY?"

Gaz goes over and slaps her in the face. "Stupid fangirl moments…"

"S-sorry, I just felt like it…"

"Gen, go into the corner and sing depressing songs if you want to, but please, let us get on with the fic."

"'Kay…"

Tsuki clears her throat. "Thank you. Now, tonight's duel is between ZIM AND GAZ!"

APPLAUSE!

A random audience person shouts, "I LOVE ZAGR!"

Gen snaps her head up. "AND I DON'T! And now Sakura doesn't remember who Sayoran is which stinks because SHE LOVES HIM! And he loves her! But neither of them knows even though they're DESTINED FOR EACH OTHER!"

"This is what happens after she read two issues?" Tak asks.

"Yeah. But hey, I fell in love with Twilight at first glance," Tsuki replies as the Twilight haters gag.

Dib folds his arms. "Twilight is completely unrealistic. Vampires have specific weaknesses, some of which are practically passed over in order to make that pitiful romance work. And vampires aren't… sparkly."

Tsuki hits him with the ESoP. "Silence, you insolent infidel!"

"Infidel…?"

Gaz walks up to the stage. "Can we get this over with?"

"Yes, PLEASE. I don't want to talk about Twilight anymore," Gen pants.

Gaz shrugs.

"Na na na  
>Na na na<p>

Na na na  
>Na na na<p>

I am a new breed of doll  
>Psycho baby doll gone wrong<br>Toolbelt with a lollipop  
>Curling iron, Kalashnikov<br>I am a new breed of doll  
>Fighting for a brave new world<br>Gas mask and a magic wand  
>Bulldozer and tutu on<p>

Load up, load up  
>March to the future<br>Lipstick, I might kill you or kiss ya  
>Baby doll gone wrong<p>

She cries real tears  
>In her bed tonight<br>Press the button right  
>She will glow so bright<br>She bleeds real blood  
>Cut her with a knife<br>She'll fight for her life  
>But it's you who dies<br>Surprise, surprise

Catch me  
>Can you still believe<br>My name  
>And can't you see this<br>Baby doll gone wrong

I am a new breed of doll  
>Crash helmet and halo on<br>Jackhammer and my apron  
>Throw my head back, sing a song<p>

I am a new breed of doll  
>Mace you with my aerosol<br>Tinkerbell and S&M  
>Bumper car that has a brain<p>

Load up, load up  
>March to the future<br>Lipstick, I might kill you or kiss ya  
>Baby doll gone wrong<p>

She cries real tears  
>In her bed tonight<br>Press the button right  
>She will glow so bright<br>And she bleeds real blood  
>Cut her with a knife<br>She'll fight for her life  
>But it's you who dies<br>Surprise, surprise

In her bed tonight  
>Press the button right<br>She will glow so bright  
>And she bleeds real blood<br>Cut her with a knife  
>She'll fight for her life<br>But it's you who dies  
>Surprise, surprise<p>

Baby doll  
>I'll kick the boys and make them fall<br>Baby doll  
>I'll kick the boys and make them fall<p>

Sugar and razor blade  
>Acid pink lemonade<br>That's how baby dolls are made  
>We misbehave<br>We misbehave

Load up, load up  
>March to the future<br>Lipstick, I might kill you or kiss ya  
>Baby doll gone wrong<p>

She cries real tears  
>In her bed tonight<br>Press the button right  
>She will glow so bright<br>She bleeds real blood  
>Cut her with a knife<br>She'll fight for her life  
>But it's you who dies<br>Surprise, surprise

In her bed tonight  
>Press the button right<br>She will glow so bright  
>She cries real tears<br>Cut her with a knife  
>She'll fight for her life<br>But it's you who dies  
>Surprise, surprise."<p>

APPLAUSE

Gen blinks. "That song kinda scares me…"

Tak rolls her eyes. "It's Gaz, what would you expect?"

Tsuki grins. "Me likey that song…"

Zim runs away. "IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!"

"This doesn't look good…" Dib says.

Tsuki tries to slap him with the ESoP but Gen jumps in the way. It hits her instead.

"Okay, that felt awesome but painful!" She springs up from the floor and takes away the fish. "AND NO MORE OF THIS NONSENSE! Dib-kun's been tortured enough." She throws the fish away. "And besides, Zim-kun and Dib-kun have to fight with these trout."

They catch the large fish. "What?"

"Reviewer request. NOW FIGHT!"

The slap each other with the trout for a loooooong time as the other s eat the reviewer-sent food (you guys are so generous. X3). Finally, Dib collapses.

"VICTORY FOR ZIM!"

Tsuki hands him a cake. "Congrats, here's your prize. Now shut your trap so we can move on."

"With what?" Gen asks. "Usually we have a bunch of filler stuff. Today we don't have very much. WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING!"

"Fine. Uh… you handle it. I guess people like it when you and GIR do crazy random stuff."

Gen and _GIR_ stare at each other excitedly before breaking out in song.

"_Oh, Larry Boy, we need you now  
>To show the way to save the day to save the town.<em>  
>And from the cave the tires squeal<br>And to the rescue comes a cucumber of steel!

Oh, Larry Boy! We need you here!  
>Oh, won't you come and lend a super suction ear?<br>Oh, Larry Boy! You're dynamite!  
>Fighting what is wrong; standing up for what is right!<p>

'Cause what the world needs now is a hero  
>One that's kind and true and brave and bold<br>If you haven't guessed yet, then it's time you know

'Cause what the world needs now is a hero  
>One that's kind and true and brave and bold<br>If you haven't guessed yet, then it's time you knooooowww (time you know)  
>That he is that hero<p>

I AM THAT HERO!"

…

"Veggie Tales again? Really?"

"I likes da veggie peoples!" GIR shouts happily. "Now whut we do?"

Gen taps her chin. "Cosplay!"

FIVE MINUTES LATER:

Everyone is dressed like they were in 'Zim in Wonderland' (another one of my fics).

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "What have you done?"

"Put Zim-kun in a dress, Dib-kun in a Mad Hatter outfit, GIR-kun in his dog suit and told him to keep smiling, Tak-chan in the Red Queen dress, and, uh… shoved Membrane Kohai in the Magical Elevator of Torture with the Control Brains Kohai because I don't like them," Gen says.

"What about Gaz and the Tallest?"

"I left Gaz-san alone and the Tallest-kun weren't in the story so they're dressed up as Phoenix Wright post-disbarment and Miles Edgeworth."

…

Tsuki widens her eyes and steps away. "Why don't you go and play with your hobo friend?"

"PHOENIX WRIGHT IS NOT A HOBO! HE JUST LOOKS LIKE ONE AND I BLAME STUPID KRISTOPH GAVIN! DIE, GAVIN, DIE!"

…

"Go read your Tsubasa Chronicle."

"'Kay…" Gen leaves the room and comes back with the first issue.

A large plate of cookies from a reviewer shows up.

"Yay, cookies!" GIR shouts, reaching for one.

"Stop, GIR-kun!" Gen shouts. "One of those cookies is gonna explode!"

Tsuki reaches in, grabs a cookie, and throws it at Zim. It explodes.

"Found it."

"OW! INFERIOR HUMAN BAKERY OFFSPRING!"

Gen bursts out laughing.

"Now, I think we've had enough filler material. Zim, you're up," Tsuki announces.

"Zim does not want to sing in a dress!"

"Too bad. Do it."

Zim angrily grabs the MoD, picking up his frilly little skirt as he walks. Gen and GIR run up to sing backup.

"Baby I know your eyes see right through my disguise

_And no one can deny_  
>Baby that I'm the one whose love is no surprise<br>_And he can't tell you no lie_  
>But there's a secret I've been hidin' I can't keep it no more<br>_There's this thing about himself he's never told you before_  
>Baby!<br>_He needs to tell you something_  
>I don't got a bellybutton<br>Oh I need to tell you something  
><em>Have you figured out<br>He don't got a bellybutton_  
><span>Bellybutton no, oh no no<span>_  
><em>Baby please don't squeal, just tell me how you feel  
><em>Cause his love is for real<br>_And if you went away, my heart would never heal  
><em>So to you he appeals<em>  
>there's something missing in my middle and it's hard to ignore<br>_there's this thing about himself he's never told you before  
><em>Baby!  
><em>He needs to tell you something<em>  
>I don't got a bellybutton<br>Oh I need to tell you something  
><em>Have you figured out<br>He don't got a bellybutton_  
><span>Bellybutton no, oh no no<span>_  
><em>  
><strong>Bellybutton!<strong>  
><em>Uh, uh<br>_**Bellybutton!**  
><em>Uh, uh<br>_**You say your bellybuttons missing, there's no reason for alarm  
>Its a common thing for Irkens, it won't do you any harm<br>You're technically an alien and with that much being said;  
>Your umbilical equivocal is up there on your head!<br>You could opt for a prosthetic but of course you'd have to know  
>It'd be covered by your shirt, but not your HMO!<strong>  
><em>Bellybutton!<em>  
><strong>Uh, uh<strong>  
><em>Bellybutton<em>  
><strong>Uh, uh<br>**A stylish something absent from my midriffs dcor  
><em>There's this thing about himself he's never told you before<br>_Baby!  
><em>He needs to tell you something<br>_I don't got a belly button  
>Oh I need to tell you something<br>_Have you figured out  
>He don't got a belly button<br>_Belly button no, oh no no  
>No belly button!"<p>

APPLAUSE

…

"What was that?" Tsuki asks.

"More Veggie Tales!" Gen cheers. "And GIR rapping to the doctor part!"

"I thought it was a solo song."

"Not really."

"Fine. Let's just vote."

THE INVADER ZIM SINGING CHALLENGE WILL BE BACK AFTER THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK:

_BUY MAH WAFFLEZ!_

NOW, BACK TO THE SHOW!

After voting, everyone waits calmly for the guests to arrive. Tsuki looks at the card with the guests' names and facepalms. "Oh, great. Tonight's guests are… Sayoran, Sakura, Fai, Kurogane, and Mokona Midoki from Tsubasa Chronicle."

They enter. Gen goes fangirl-crazy and cuddles the little white puffball that is Monkna. "THIS IS AWESOME! Mokona, what's up?"

Zim staggers back. "What is that…thing?"

"MOKONA IS NOT A THING! MOKONA IS MOKONA!" Mokona and Gen say in unison, quoting the first epic issue.

Zim passes out.

Gen smiles. "Hi, Fai-san! Hi, Kuro-rin!"

Kurogane screams, "NOT ANOTHER ONE! STOP CALLING ME THAT!"

Fai and Gen laugh.

As Gen squeals with joy, Syaoran and Sakura come to the front of the stage.

"Great job, everybody!" Sakura says cheerfully. "It was a really close vote tonight!"

Syaoran rips open the envelope. "The winner is…ZIM!"

APPLAUSE!

"ZIM HAS WON AGAIN! ZIM SHALL RULE YOU ALL WITH AN IRON FIST!"

Gen and Fai both give Zim a swift kick to the gut.

"Kitanai Irken-kun, please don't do that every time you achieve something."

"I don't do that every time!"

"You did it when your soda came out of the vending machine."

"SILENCE!" Zim shouts. "Go play with your… wing-friends."

Tsuki blocks anyone from going anywhere. "EXCEPT WE'RE OUT OF TIME. G'bye, everyone!"

Gen is waving. "Bye, Mokona! Bye, Syaoran-kun! Bye, Sakura-chan! Bye, Fai-san! Bye, Kuro-poo!"

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, FAI!"

"Really, Kuro-chan? Good luck with that!"

Tsuki shuts off the camera as Gen cracks up.


	15. Red and Membrane vs GIR and Gen

**I just want to make a few announcements: **

**Updates might be slower again. I'm working on more than one fic right now. (A dumb idea, but I'm doing it anyway)**

**Second, I'm a little worried that I might be breaking the No user participation rule. I'm SORRY! I love truth or dare fics, but I'm one of those worrying guilt trap people who always want to follow the rules. Please understand. You can still give a shout out or gifts or something, but I just want to be careful. I'M SORRRRRYYYYY! ( I also say sorry way too much).**

**Finally, some good news: I FOUND THE TSUBASA ANIME IN ENGLISH! **

**Thank you all for your reviews. You made someone very happy...**

* * *

><p>"WHEEEEEE!" Gen screams as she runs around the stage in pure glee. "I LOVE THE WORLD!"<p>

Dib points. "Uh- what's wrong with her?"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "She's really happy. The reviewers were really nice to her this time, she bought a cactus for the studio and named it Miles, and she gets to sing tonight."

Gen runs into a giant muffin. "OMIGOSH I LOVE YOU PEOPLE SO MUCH!" She, GIR, and MiMi start shoving it into their mouths.

Tsuki reads the reviews. "These are…interesting…"

Meteors and tacos with mustaches fall from the ceiling.

"This is one of the weirdest…"

Dib is slapped with a FLAMING GAUNTLET MAGICAL PIG-ON-A-STICK! He is now unconscious.

Tsuki blinks. "We have to do that every time they talk?"

Gen is currently glomping the life out of Zim. "JUST HIT THEM ONCE! Zimmeh-kun, I'm not going all ninja on you today! I'M JUST SO HAPPEH! Like that creepy kid Nick…"

Everyone waits in expectation.

"Well?" Tak asks finally. "Aren't you going to start bawling over that other Nick you're always blubbering about?"

"Nope! Not now!"

Dib wakes up. "No annoying fangirl crying?"

"Nuh-uh! Oh, and Dib, a reviewer sent you a cupcake! That was nice! X3" Gen hands him the cupcake.

Dib looks around. "Someone was nice to me without nearly killing me in fangirl-ness?"

"Yup. XD"

Dib smiles and goes into his own happy little world…

Tsuki punches him in the gut. "Ugh, you make me sick. Anyway, ON WITH THE SHOW! Tonight's duel is… GIR AND GEN VS RED AND MEMBRANE!"

Gen smiles at Membrane. "You're goin' DOWN, kitanai excuse for a kyoju."

Tsuki clamps a hand over Gen's mouth. "Whatever. Tak, go play Dance Dance Revolution."

Tak shrugs and starts playing awesomely.

GIR and Gen chant, "GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!"

'**WINNER!'**

"Hmph." Tak smirks in content and starts another round.

Tsuki nudges Zim. "You made a good choice with your crush, 'ya loser."

"YOU LIE!"

Zim is slapped with the FLAMING GAUNTLET MAGICAL PIG-ON-A-STICK!

Dib cocks his head to the side. "I still have no clue what that thing even is…"

"Who cares?" Gaz says.

"RED, MEMBRANE, START SINGING!" Tsuki shouts.

They take the stage, Red a bit panicked and Membrane completely calm.

"**For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.  
>I'm hoping you feel the same way too.<strong>

Where there's black, there is white  
>Where there's dark, there is light<br>Where there's wrong, there is right  
>Where there's day, there is night<p>

Now don't be so naïve  
>Just tell me you believe<p>

[One thing leads to another, baby]

**Got looks, got style  
>Even has a pretty smile<br>Buy her dinner, so worthwhile  
>Kind you might walk down that aisle<br>Ice cream, two scoops please  
>Banana split, bring me to my knees<br>Rainbow sprinkles, cherry on top  
>Girl's so sweet, I'm gonna pop<br>Wait, wait, contemplate  
>Get your brain together<br>You can't think straight  
>Hesi-hesi-hesitate<br>Best make a move  
>It's getting late<br>Yo, go, with the flow  
>Is she diggin' on you?<br>You don't know  
>Oh no, look out below<br>Check that clock  
>It's time to go<br>**  
>If you believe...<br>Where there's fast, there is slow  
>Where there's stop, there is go (<strong>go... go... go, go, go<strong>)  
>Where there's ebb, there is flow<br>Where there's high, there is low (**low... low... low, low, low)**

Now don't be so naïve **(don't be so, don't be so)**  
>Just tell me you believe [<span>let's begin together, baby<span>]

Step 1, step 2: Hypothesis,  
>See it through<br>Calculate,  
>What's the mood<br>Get the facts  
>Then conclude<br>Music, beat, bench seat  
>Stop the car,<br>Be indiscreet  
>Step 3: Keep it real<br>Tell her how you really feel  
>Her place,<br>Warm embrace  
>Sweeps her hair<br>Across her face  
>Spin, grin, "can't come in"<br>Ziggazig what?  
>It's a sin<br>Bye bye,  
>Gotta fly<br>Changed my mind  
>Ask me why<br>Yo no offense  
>Just common sense<br>Wish you believed in science (science?)

... Science  
>If you believe in science<p>

Now don't be so naive (**don't be so, d-don't be so**)  
>Just tell me you believe<p>

If you believe..."

APPLAUSE

Gen smiles. "That was awesome! I totally wish Membrane hadn't been singing it!"

"That was actually pretty good, you tall freakaziod and you cube-headed nerd," Tsuki says with an eye roll.

Zim and Dib randomly start tackling each other. Gen and GIR jump in. "WRESTLING MATCH!"

…

…

…

…

…

Purple scratches his antennae. "I'm not the only one who doesn't understand them, right?"

Lard Nar shakes his head. "Why did I let her join the Resisty…?"

Spleenk frowns. "I-I thought she'd be good…"

Tsuki pushes her way toward Lard Nar. "Wait- you let her join the Resisty?"

"Well, yes. She came up to me after the third or fourth episode and asked. We need more members, so I, uh…"

"…"

"Hey! At least she can fight with that gummy bear sack and that Cup of Punishment thing!" Lard Nar tries to defend himself.

"Lard Nar, you must be insane."

"I think we're all questioning our sanity at this point…" says Purple. "I mean, really!"

Tak nods. "I know what you mean…"

Gaz raises an eyebrow at her friend. "I thought you treated your leaders with the utmost respect or something."

Tak shrugs. "I do things my own way. Plus, they don't hate me like they do SOMEONE…"

Zim is trying to fight off Gen who is trying to hit him with her large gummy bear sack. "YOU LIE, TAK!"

Gen giggles. "You like her!"

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY I DON'T?"

Dib looks at the ceiling. "Really? You're still denying it?"

Everyone stars at the tiny Irken. Zim says nothing.

_The Invader Zim Singing Challenge will be back after this short news bulletin!_

"_This just in: Zim the ex-Invader is still denying that he has a major crush on fellow Irken Tak. He has been denying it ever since the second episode of IZSC and-"_

"_SILENCE, PATHETIC HUMAN NEWS-DRONE! YOU ARE A FILTHY HUMAN LIAR!"_

"_You like Tak. You LOVE her."_

"_SHUT YOUR TRAP BEFORE I FILL IT WITH-"_

"_You do."_

"_DO NOT!"_

"_Whatever you sa-ayyyy..."_

…

_Now back to the fic!_

Tsuki pushes Gen and GIR onto the stage. "Your turn to sing… I jope this place is still standing when you two are done…"

_Gen _and GIRsmile excitedly at each other and beginning.

"_Things are looking up, oh, finally  
>I thought I'd never see the day when you smile at me<br>We always pull through, oh, when we try  
>I'm always wrong but you're never right<br>_Oh, you're never right

Honestly, can you believe we crossed  
>The world while it's asleep?<br>I'd never trade it in 'cause I've always wanted this  
>And it's not a dream anymore, no, oh, oh, oh<br>It's not a dream anymore, it's worth fighting for

**Could have given up so easily  
>I was a few cheap shots away from the end of me<br>Taken for granted, 'most everything  
>That I would have died for just yesterday, <strong>just yesterday

Honestly, can you believe we crossed  
>The world while it's asleep?<br>I'd never trade it in 'cause I've always wanted this  
>And it's not a dream anymore, no, oh, oh, oh<br>It's not a dream anymore, it's worth fighting for

_God knows the world doesn't need another band  
><em>**Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh  
>But what a waste it would've been<strong>  
><em>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<em>

I can't believe we almost hung it up  
>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<br>We're just getting started  
>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<p>

Honestly, can you believe we crossed  
>The world while it's asleep?<br>I'd never trade it in 'cause I've always wanted this  
>And it's not a dream anymore, no, oh, oh, oh<br>It's not a dream anymore, no, oh  
>It's not a dream anymore, no, oh, oh, oh<br>It's not a dream anymore, it's worth fighting for."

"Wow, guys, that was really-"

"I can't believe we almost hung it up!  
>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<br>We're just getting started  
>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<p>

I can't believe we almost hung it up  
>Whoa, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh<br>We're just getting started, we're just getting started!"

APPLAUSE

Tsuki looks around irritably. "It's really over this time?"

Gen and GIR nod happily.

Tsuki grins. "That was awesome. A lot of…energy."

Gen laughs. "Well, we are both really hyper right now, and WE STILL GOTS A BUNCH OF THAT MUFFIN TO EAT!"

Tsuki watches as they race towards the muffin. "I think I need to talk to that asylum again…"

Dib looks around at the chaos that is the Invader Zim Singing Challenge

"Well, it's time to vote once again…"

EVERYBODY VOTES AGAIN AND MAN I NEED SOMETHING ELSE TO FILL UP THIS TIME PERIOD!

Tsuki takes the stage. "Tonight's guest is… Invader Skoodge!"

Skoodge enters proudly.

"Wow. You're awfully proud for someone living in his best friend's basement," Tak says.

"YOU'RE STILL LIVING THERE?" Zim shouts.

Skoodge kicks the ground and picks up the envelope. "Yeah… Anyway, tonight's winners are… GIR AND GEN!"

The two ecstatic winners dance and sing random songs in victory.

Gen air hugs a large potted Saguaro cactus. "Let's go celebrate, Miles!"

Tsuki buries her face in her hands. "Just great… more hyperactivity. Well, I hope you enjoyed the show. Man, I need some asprin…"

"ZIM DOES NOT LOVE TAK!"

"YES YOU DO! And, next chapter, we're introducing a couple of other OCs who'll be joining us a lot from now on. If you've read New Generations, you know who they are!" Tsuki announces proudly. "G'bye!"


	16. Gaz vs Dib

**Imma changing the rating to T or violence and song lyrics... just in case...**

**I am pleased to announce the upcoming IZSC 20th CHAPTER EXTRAVABANANZA! Chapter 20 is going to be a super-long chapter with tons of singing and comedy! PM me if you have any suggestions! CHAPTER 20!**

**Tim-Is-A-Fun-Sucker, thank you for your latest song request... XD**

* * *

><p>"Helooooo peoples!" Gen shouts, waving. "DIB'S GONNA SING THE TSUBASA CHRONICLE THEME SONG!"<p>

Dib looks up strangely. "Wait… THE LYRICS ARE IN JAPANESE! I have no clue what the words mean!"

"I DO NOT CARE!"

Tsuki enters. "Are you forcing people to sing in Japanese again?"

"Yes," Gen replies. "SING NOW, FOOLISH HUMAN!"

Dib picks up the MoD.

"Hatenaki yume motomeru shirube naki sekai de...

Kasanaru omoi kokoro tsukisasu kodou

Shizuka ni tsuzuku tamerai mo nai uta

Tooku sora no kanata kara mazariatta bokura no kage

Hitsuzen to kimagure no naka shirusareta kioku

Surechigatta toki no uzu

Kuchihatetemo kimi no koe wo shinjite

Hatenaki yume motomeru shirube naki mirai de

Boku ga hikari nakushitemo itsuka

kimi ga tomoshite kureta kirameku mune no honoo

Tsubasa ni kawaru kibou no kakera

Yamanai ame to yasashiku nureru tsuki

Kizutsuitemo ii kaze ni yure yuku bojou

Kurayami mo tsuranuku shisen aoku sunda hitomi no oku

Zetsubou mo kodoku mo koete kizamareta shirushi

Yugandeku toki no hazama

Kawashita kizuna ni kimi wo kanjita

Hakanaki michi wo tadoru kotae naki sekai de

Fui ni mayoi tachidomatteru kimi yo

Mune kiramekasu kibou no asu e

Hakanaki yume motomeru kotae naki sekai de

Boku no negai todokeru kagayaku mune no honoo

Hatenaki yume motomeru shirube naki sekai de

Boku ga hikari nakushitemo itsuka

Kimi ga tomoshite kureta kirameku mune no honoo

Tsubasa ni kawaru kibou no kakera."

"AWESOMENESS!"

Tsuki pushes Dib off the stage. "Whatever. Now, our special part-time hosts or whatever we're gonna call them… REN AND ZACK!"

A girl with black hair and a guy who looks a lot like Dib from that online "Misery Doom" comic enter fist fighting.

"YOU'LL NEVER STOP ME!"

"I HATE YOU!"

"I HATE YOU!"

"PITIFUL CREATURE!"

…

The girl, Ren, scratches her forehead. "Um…sorry. X3"

Zack (the dude) points at Dib and his mouth hangs open.

Dib looks around weirdly. "Why does that kid look like me?"

Tsuki steps in between them. "We can't tell you their identities exactly or the universe might explode due to the space-time continuum. But let's just say I hate BOTH OF YOU."

Zim glares at Zack. "Zim does not like the Zack-human."

"Why?"

"Because you look like the Dib!"

Ren giggles. "Even here no one likes you, filth-pest. X3"

"Shut up…"

Ren bursts out laughing. "I love it here already!"

Zim thinks for a moment. "Filth-pest… I like it. You, dirt child 'Ren'. FEEL HONORED TO HAVE YOU SPEECH RESPECTED BY ZIM!"

Ren glares. "Dirt-child? Really! Where did all the love go?"

Gen smirks. "Don't worry, Ren-chan. Zim-kun likey Tak."

"STOP LYING!"

"I am not lying. It is you who is spouting lies from your speech-hole, kitanai Irken-kun."

"STOP CALLING ME THIS KITANAI-THING!"

Dib punches Zim in the gut and a brawl breaks out between the two. Ren hits Zack in the arm and they start slapping each other.

"SILENCE!" Tsuki shouts. Everyone stops their activity. "THANKYOU. Now, tonight's duel is… GAZ VS DIB!"

Zack cheers while Ren slumps. "Blah, blah, those two, I hate Dib."

Tsuki smiles. "FINALLY. I'm not alone."

Gen frowns. "AM I THE ONLY PERSON WHO LIKES DIB HERE?"

GIR cuddles her head. "I like Biggy Head!" Gen huggles with him.

Zack raises his arm weakly. "Do I count here?"

"NO YOU DON'T COUNT BECAUSE YOU'RE STUPID!"

…

"No one asked you, Zim!" Dib shouts.

Zim raises an antenna. "I DO NOT CARE! And why do you stand up for the Zack-creature? He is quite ugly."

"Hey!"

"SILENCE!"

Dib thinks. "I dunno. Good first impression, I guess."

Gen laughs. "Dude! Considering the circumstances, THAT'S HILARIOUS!" She snaps up and turns to Membrane. "You. Kohai Membrane. Make a forcefield that will protect the space-time continuum so that we can reveal the true identities of these two humans. If you can. I still do not like you. When you are done, go into the Magical Elevator of Torture."

Membrane walks away, chuckling. "Poor peculiar child…"

Tsuki grabs the MoD and thrusts it into Gaz's hand. "You know what to do. WIN. Win, my violent friend."

Gen rubs her chin. "Remember the time I called you my semi-violent friend and the 'semi' part offended you?"

Gaz punches Gen in the stomach. "Be quiet, Gen.

"If I die young, bury me in satin  
>Lay me down on a bed of roses<br>Sink me in the river at dawn  
>Send me away with the words of a love song<p>

Lord make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother  
>She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors<br>Oh, and life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no  
>Ain't even gray, but she buries her baby<p>

The sharp knife of a short life  
>Well, I've had just enough time<p>

If I die young, bury me in satin  
>Lay me down on a bed of roses<br>Sink me in the river at dawn  
>Send me away with the words of a love song<p>

The sharp knife of a short life  
>Well, I've had just enough time<p>

And I'll be wearing white when I come into your kingdom  
>I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger<br>I've never known the loving of a man  
>But it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand<p>

There's a boy here in town, says he'll love me forever  
>Who would have thought forever could be severed by<br>The sharp knife of a short life  
>Well, I've had just enough time<p>

So put on your best, boys, and I'll wear my pearls  
>What I never did is done<p>

A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar  
>They're worth so much more after I'm a goner<br>And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singing  
>Funny, when you're dead how people start listening<p>

If I die young, bury me in satin  
>Lay me down on a bed of roses<br>Sink me in the river at dawn  
>Send me away with the words of a love song<p>

The ballad of a dove  
>Go with peace and love<br>Gather up your tears, keep 'em in your pocket  
>Save them for a time when you're really gonna need them, oh<p>

The sharp knife of a short life  
>Well, I've had just enough time<br>So put on your best, boys  
>And I'll wear my pearls."<p>

APPLAUSE

Gen wipes a tear from her eye, then smiles. "I was supposed to do this, but I was way too happy last chapter, so…" She proceeds to go all ninja with her sack of gummy bears on Zim's sorry green face, then hits him with the ESoP, THEN throws him into the Magical Elevator of Torture while Tsuki inflicts the ultimate PAIN on Keef and the Tallest.

"That was fun, Egoisuto!" Gen calls to the screaming Irken inside the elevator.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ZIM?"

"The Japanese word for egotist. That and kitanai Irken-kun are my nicknames for you. XD"

Dib raises an eyebrow. "Well, do I have a nickname?"

"Sure. Okii-Atama. I'll abbreviate it as Oki-Ata."

"What does Okii-Atama mean?"

"Big head."

"DX"

Gen giggles. "Now, for an extra requested song… TSUKI AND OKI-ATA GOTTA SING VEGGIETALES!"

Tsuki stops beating Keef. "WHAT?"

Ren laughs. "I'm putting this on YouTube."

Zack buries his face in his hands. "Why me? Why?"

Gen pushes Dib and **Tsuki** onstage. Tsuki sits on one of those therapist-couch-thingies while Dib perches on a stool with a note pad.

"**If my lips ever left my mouth,  
>Packed a bag and headed south,<br>That'd be too bad, I'd be so sad.**

I see, that'd be too bad, you'd be so sad?

That'd be too bad.

Alrighty.

**If my lips said "Adios,  
>I don't like you, I think you're gross."<br>That'd be too bad, I might get mad.**

Hm, that'd be too bad, you might get mad?

**That'd be too bad.**

Fascinating.  
><strong><br>If my lips moved to Duluth  
>Left a mess and took my tooth.<br>That'd be too bad, I'd call my Dad.**

Oh dear, that'd be too bad, you'd call your dad?  
><strong><br>That'd be too bad.**

Hold it. Did you say your father? Facinating!  
>So what you're saying is if your lips left you?<p>

**That'd be too bad, I'd be so sad.  
>I might get mad, I call my Dad.<br>That'd be too bad.**

That'd be too bad?  
><strong><br>That'd be too bad.**

Why?  
><strong><br>Because I love my lips. (makes noises in tune with her lips)  
><strong>  
>Oh my! This is more serious than I thought.<br>Tsuki, what do you see here?

**Um, that looks like a lip.**

What about this?  
><strong><br>It's a lip.**

And this?  
><strong><br>It's a lip, it's a lip, it's a lip, lip, lip  
>It's a lip, it's a lip, it's a lip, lip, lip<br>It's a lip, it's a lip, it's a lip, lip, lip  
>It's a lip, it's a lip, lip, lip.<br>**  
>Tsuki, tell me about your childhood.<br>**  
>When I was just two years old,<br>I left my lips out in the cold.  
>And they turned blue,<br>What could I do?**

Oh dear. They turned blue,  
>What could you do?<p>

**Oh, They turned blue.  
><strong>  
><span>I see.<span>

**On the day I got my tooth,  
>I had to kiss my Great Aunt Ruth.<br>She had a beard and it felt weird.  
><strong>  
>My, my, she had a beard<br>And it felt weird?

**She had a beard.**

Oh!

**Ten days after I turned 8,  
>Got my lips stuck in a gate<br>My friends all laughed…**

And I just stood there until the fire department came  
>and broke the lock with a crowbar and I had to spend<br>the next six weeks in lip rehab with this kid named Oscar  
>who got stung by a bee right on the lip and we couldn't<br>even talk to each other until the fifth week because both  
>our lips were so swollen and when he did start speaking<br>he just spoke polish and I only knew like three words in polish  
>except now I know four because Oscar taught me the<br>word for lip, "Usta".

Your friends all laughed. Usta. How do you spell that?

**I don't know.**

So what you're saying is that when you were young?  
><strong><br>They turned blue, what could I do?  
>She had a beard, and it felt weird.<br>My friends all laughed, usta.**

I'm confused.  
><strong><br>I HATE YOUR GUTS!"**

Gen is cheering like a maniac. "THAT WAS AWESOMEINNIO! But, that's not how the song ends…"

Tsuki growls and steps off the stage. "I. Don't. Care."

Ren shrugs. "Aw, man. I would've wanted to see it the right way, but I agree with her on the hating Dib thing."

Dib cocks his head to the side. "May I ask why you hate me, too?"

"I'm not allowed to say at this point."

"…This is getting really annoying."

"Zim likes the Ren. She can handle weapons well."

The Tallest whirl around to Ren wide-eyed. "WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN SHOWING HIM?"

"None of your concern."

"T_T"

"XD"

Gen giggles. "This is awesome. Now, Egoi, please show Oki-ata to the stage again for his competitive performance."

Zim pushes Dib onstage. "I like your new nickname, filthy thing."

"I resent that…" Zack and Dib mumble at the same time.

Dib picks up the MoD.

"The stars lean down to kiss you  
>And I lie awake and miss you<br>Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly  
>But I'll miss your arms around me<br>I'd send a postcard to you, dear  
>'Cause I wish you were here<p>

I'll watch the night turn light-blue  
>But it's not the same without you<br>Because it takes two to whisper quietly

The silence isn't so bad  
>Till I look at my hands and feel sad<br>'Cause the spaces between my fingers  
>Are right where yours fit perfectly<p>

I'll find repose in new ways  
>Though I haven't slept in two days<br>'Cause cold nostalgia  
>Chills me to the bone<p>

But drenched in vanilla twilight  
>I'll sit on the front porch all night<br>Waist-deep in thought because  
>When I think of you I don't feel so alone<p>

I don't feel so alone, I don't feel so alone

As many times as I blink  
>I'll think of you tonight<br>I'll think of you tonight

When violet eyes get brighter  
>And heavy wings grow lighter<br>I'll taste the sky and feel alive again

And I'll forget the world that I knew  
>But I swear I won't forget you<br>Oh, if my voice could reach  
>Back through the past<br>I'd whisper in your ear  
>Oh darling, I wish you were here."<p>

APPLAUSE!

"_If you cut me I suppose I would bleed… The colors of the evening stars…. You can go anywhere you wish, 'cause I'll be there… wherever you are…"_ Gen sings dreamily. "That guy is weird, but he has some nice songs. Very calm."

Tsuki growls. "I prefer country and rock, but I do like 'Fireflies'."

"I think Owl City is a real Dib kind of thing," Gen says, tapping her chin.

"Can we please stop talking about this metropolis of nocturnal fowl and move on?" Zim asks irritably.

"PLEASE." Ren says before she starts to hum 'Fireflies'.

Zack glares at her and they begin fighting again.

It suddenly starts to rain muffins and little Reese's cups that dance by bouncing up and down adorably. Gen, Ren, and GIR get really super happy and start catching them with baskets.

…

…

…

"It's official. I am now officially afraid of fangirls and reviewers," Dib says with a shudder.

"ZIM IS NOT AFRAID!"

Gen glomps Zim and he starts screaming in terror.

"Dude… FAIL," Zack laughs, eating a Reese's cup.

Tsuki throws the ballots at everybody. "It's time to vote, whether you guys want to or not."

_The Invader Zim Singing Challenge will be back after this commercial break!_

_DANGIT WE'RE ALL TIRED OF THE ECONOMIC DEFICIT! So we have the perfect product for you… money! This bundle of twenty bucks can be yours absolutely, positively, completely and utterly free*!_

_*With a payment of 100 dollars._

_Buy now!_

_NOW BACK TO THE FIC!_

Ren and Zack take the stage with the winners' envelope.

"Alright," Ren says. "This was a really close vote. It was a one vote difference, but your winner is…"

Zack grabs the envelope from her and tears it open, obviously pretending it was her throat. "The winner is… GAZ!"

Gaz smiles evilly for a second.

"B-but-" Zack stammers.

"IN YOUR FILTY FACE!" Ren shouts.

Membrane runs out carrying a stack of scientific papers. "I have done it! To avoid altering the space-time continuum, I have created a small protective device. As long as the memories of those who find out these children's identities are cleared of the truth, the universe will not die!"

…

"This story makes no sense," Tak says, rolling her eyes.

"Now, what is it that it's so important to know?" Membrane asks, rubbing his chin.

…

"This is awkward," Gaz gets out.

Ren scoots over to Zim. "…So… you say you don't love M- Tak?"

"ZIM DOES NOT!" he hollers.

Ren folds her arms. "Well, then! LOVE HER! LOVE HER, I SAY!"

Zim staggers back at her sudden outburst. "WHY?" WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME? I AM YOUR SUPERIOR!"

"WELL, THANKS FOR ENCOURAGING ME, DAD!"

Zim faints.

Dib bursts out laughing. "Guess he's not as strong as he thinks, huh?"

Zack walks away slowly…

Dib raises an eyebrow. "What are you…?"

Zack tries to make a run for it, but Tsuki throws him to the ground. "Go on, tell him, you idiot."

"Don't tell me he's-"

"Your son."

Dib faints.

Zack faints.

GIR faints with a muffin in his mouth. (It's banana!)

Tak looks mildly uncomfortable. "I think I know why she's a ZATR shipper…"

Ren nods slowly and buries her face in her hands. "I'm sorry…"

Tak puts her arm around Ren. "No problem. I like you. Make Zim faint again, will you?"

Tsuki goes closer to the camera to end the chapter as Zim and Dib wake up and start screaming like banshees. "Well, see 'ya next time! And we might wait a little longer to wipe the boys' memories… XD"


	17. Skoodge vs Keef

A fly is buzzing around the room. Gen swats at it, then flinches as it comes near her.

"What are you doing?" Red asks as she runs away from the insect.

"UGH! There's a fly in here and I HATE FLIES! They're all gross and… pesky…" Gen says.

"…And they creep you out," Tsuki says.

"Yeah. AGH! I WISH THIS STUPID THING WOULD GO AHEAD AND DIE!"

"I wish Zack would die…" Ren whispers.

Zim beams. "Zim is proud of you."

Membrane walks out with some calculations. "We have one more chapter until their memories must be wiped."

"Got it," says Tsuki as Gen swats at the fly.

Zack stands proudly. "And I'm not hated by everyone."

"bak602 doesn't count," Tsuki says nonchalantly.

"Yeah, but-"

"GIR doesn't count."

"Not-"

"Dib doesn't count."

"YES, but-"

"Gen doesn't count."

"Why doesn't she count?"

"Because she's Gen."

They all stare at her while she runs around trying to avoid the fly.

"A reviewer-"

"Let's change the subject," Tsuki says. "Tonight's duel is… Skoodge vs… Keef? WHO MADE THIS DUEL?"

Purple whispers, "Skoodge can't win, he's too short… and ugly. And isn't Keef that stalker kid?"

Red nods and shudders.

"Y'know, I think some people are too hard on Keef," Gen says as she dodges the pest. "Sure, he's a stalker who is really obsessive, but he had good intentions! He just wanted to be a good friend, but, sadly, Zim isn't the best friend in the world. I mean, really! Egoi said he was sick, so Keef wanted to throw him a party to make him feel better. That's really nice! But then he was just way too stalker-esque and got his eyes replaced with machines, AND I WANT THIS FLY'S DEATH!"

Zim swats at it as it lands on his antennae. "ARGH! Zim wants to kill it, too!"

They look at each other, grin evilly, and run off.

The Tallest slam their heads on the newly constructed BRICK WALL OF HEAD-SLAMMINESS!

Gaz stares at them. "Who comes up with the names for everything here?"

Tsuki shakes her head as DOOMY KIWI TURTLES fall from the sky.

Ren, GIR , and MiMi all squee and pick them up. "We're gonna race these guys later!" Ren cheers.

"MINE'S NAME IS CNGFFKNKGFD!" GIR shouts.

Dib scratches his giant head. "Why are they kiwi turtles?"

GIR shoves one in Dib's face. "DEY SMELL LAIK KEEWEE!" (OMG! Keewee! It looks so cute!)

Tak pushes Skoodge onto the stage. "You really think you can sing?"

"Yes! I did conquer Blorch, after all!" Skoodge gloats.

"And now you live in Zim's basement."

"…It could be worse."

"How?"

"I could have never been an Invader, like y-"

Skoodge is silenced by Tak throwing him into the wall.

"Hey!" Tsuki snaps. "Tak, you can't do that!"

She cocks her head. "Why not?"

"We need him to sing. THEN you can kill him."

"Okay. "

Ren pokes Skoodge with a stick. "Um… maybe Keef should go first…"

Keef skips on stage, chanting the words 'I'm a pretty unicorn'.

Everyone shudders at the sight of Keef.

"Hiya, everybody! 'Sup, Dib?"

Dib screams and hides under a random blankie.

"Does anyone know where Zim is? He's my most bestest friend in the whole entire world! We're so close! We do everything together, but I think his skin condition is bad or something because I haven't talked to him for a while, but it'll be great once I see him again! We're gonna go to the zoo! Oh, I just love those ostriches! Zim's gonna love 'em! You wanna come too, Dib? It'll lbe great! The three of us best friends all at the zoo together! And then we can go out and get ice cream! My favorite flavor is-"

"SHUT YOUR ANNOYING TRAP AND SING, KEEF!" shouts Tsuki, thrusting the MoD into his overly-perky hand.

"Okie-dokie!

"F is for friends who do stuff together  
>U is for you and me<br>N is for anywhere and anytime at all  
>Down here in the deep blue sea<p>

F is for fire that burns down the whole town  
>U is for uranium, bombs<br>N is for no survivors when you-

F is for friends who do stuff together  
>U is for you and me<br>Try it  
>N is for anywhere and anytime at all<br>Down here in the deep blue sea

F is for frolicking through all the flowers  
>U is for Ukulele<br>N is for nose picking, sharing gum and sun licking  
>Here with my best buddy!"<p>

No one applauds.

"Well, that was short," says Ren.

"What on earth was that part in the middle?" Zack asks, backing away.

"It's what Zim would have said! He's my-"

"WE KNOW! YOUR BESTEST BUDDY!" everyone yells in exasperation.

Keef giggles like a wimpy girl.

Dib waves his hand to dispel the fly buzzing around his big head. "You know, Zim and Gen have been gone a long time. I'm worried about what they're going to do about this fly."

Tsuki taps her finger on her chin. "When those two are up to something, I'd always be worried."

GIR starts running around the room screaming before latching onto Dib's head of largeness. "WAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

MiMi rushes over in concern for GIR.

"What's wrong with him?" Tak shrieks, covering her antennae.

Tsuki and Ren attempt to pull GIR off of Dib's head. (Zack helped at first, but Ren punched him off.) "I think it's separation anxiety!" Tsuki shouts with a tug.

"OW! He hurts!" Dib shouts.

"Psh. Whiner." Gaz says without looking up.

"I WANT MASTAH!" GIR screeches.

"Your master isn't here right now, GIR," Ren whispers gently.

"I WANT MAH MASTAH NOW!"

MiMi writes something on a piece of paper and hands it to Tsuki to read.

Tsuki grins. "Hey, GIR, will singing a song with MiMi make you feel better?"

GIR snaps his head up. "Wif MiMi?"

"With MiMi."

"YES!" GIR shouts in joy. He and MiMi grab microphones and begin to sing as the fly continues to buzz.

"I can see what's happening  
>And they don't have a clue<br>They'll fall in love and here's the bottom line  
>Our trio's down to two<br>The sweet caress of twilight  
>There's magic everywhere<br>And with all this romantic atmosphere  
>Disaster's in the air<br>Can you feel the love tonight  
>The peace the evening brings<br>The world, for once, in perfect harmony  
>With all its living things<br>So many things to tell her  
>But how to make her see<br>The truth about my past  
>Impossible<br>She'd turn away from me  
>He's holding back, he's hiding<br>But what, I can't decide  
>Why won't he be the king I know he is<br>The king I see inside  
>Can you feel the love tonight<br>The peace the evening brings  
>The world, for once, in perfect harmony<br>With all its living things  
>Can you feel the love tonight<br>You needn't look too far  
>Stealing through the night's uncertainties<br>Love is where they are  
>And if he falls in love tonight<br>It can be assumed  
>His carefree days with us are history<br>In short our pal is doomed."

APPLAUSE

Ren wipes a tear from her eye as Zack gags.

"Y'know," Tak says. "I think you'd be getting beaten with human sugary mammals if someone were here…"

"Oh, that's a given," Tsuki says, sipping her Mountain Dew. "But let's enjoy the quiet while we can."

Dib grins. "Besides the little robot's breakdown, it's nice not to have Zim here."

"BITE YOUR TONGUE!" Ren shouts, holding a laser to his face.

Dib bites his tongue so hard he passes out. Tsuki laughs evilly.

The Tallest eat a pie that suddenly explodes.

…

…

…

…

…

…

"Well, that was random."

Gaz drags Skoodge to the stage. "Can he just sing so we can go home?"

Skoodge stands up proudly, grabs the MoD, and begins.

"STAND UP

In desperate times we search for the right  
>But can you look them right in the eyes<br>You say you think it'll be all right  
>I'm here to tell you<br>You were given a choice  
>So learn how to fight<p>

With a shallow mind we'll conquer the world  
>With a shallow mind we'll be all right<p>

But take a look at the world  
>And what do you do<br>NOT ENOUGH  
>Not enough for the world<br>It's time we got to  
>Save yourself<br>THE WILD IS OURSELVES

With a shallow mind we'll conquer the world  
>Running further from nature<br>Isn't that absurd  
>Full time livin' at Disneyland<br>Don't you get it man  
>We're all bleepin' animals<br>Don't you understand

In desperate times we search for the right  
>We're given a choice<br>So learn how to fight  
>SO PLEASE - TRY TO SAVE YOURSELF!"<p>

Tsuki pouts. "Aww… author bleeped out the cuss word. Killjoy fun-sucker…"

Hah hah.

Skoodge looks up at the Tallest and salutes. "My Tallest, I serve you!"

The Tallest kick Skoodge in the buttocks.

"VOTING TIME!"

Dah dah dah dah… vote vote vote vote vote vote…

Tsuki walks up to the stage and rips open the envelope. "Skoodge wins."

…

"That was uneventful." Purple says as Skoodge dances in victory.

Zim and Gen burst into the room with giant missiles aimed directly at the fly.

"SAY GOOD BYE, EARTH PEST!" Zim shouts.

"PREPARE TO DIE!" Gen hollers.

*BOOM*

There is a massive hole in the wall while the fly twitches on the floor.

"Dangit!" Gen shouts. "It's still not dead!"

Zim and Gen spray the fly with Windex. It dies.

And now, we close the chapter as Tsuki walks up to beat the duo 'round the head and shoulders.


	18. Tsuki and Gen vs Zim and Dib

Gen, Zim, and GIR are laughing maniacally in a giant doom robot. GIR cuddles a Zim toy, and a steamin' hot plate 'o' pumpkin waffles sits in front of them.

"Do I even want to know…?" Red asks as Purple inexplicably begins to vomit violently. Oh, so violently…

"Hey!" Ren shouts as she pushes Purple away. "Stop puking! Don't get the stage dirty."

"How come you get to boss them around? We're both hosting," Zack snaps as he glares at Ren.

"I'm just doing my job."

"OUR JOB!"

"Whatevs," Ren says. She comes closer to the camera.

"How do you video tape a fanfiction story?" Dib asks.

"I DON'T KNOW! ALMOST EVERYTHING HERE IS ILLOGICAL! Anyways, tonight's duel is Gen and Tsuki vs. Zim and Dib."

Tsuki grins maliciously. "This is gonna be fun."

"HOW COME I HAVE TO GO AGAInST TSUKI AGAIN?" Dib screams. "AND SING WITH ZIM!"

"FACE IT, BIGHEAD! YOU TWO NEED EACH OTHER! You need something to inspire your purpose in life, and Egoi needs someone to motivate him. Do you seriously not remember? Man, I wish Nickelodeon let them finish that episode. I've listened to the audio, and they should have let them finish it! I mean, really! But man, you guys were kinda messed up at the end with the random 'dookie' chanting, but whatever. ZIMMY GEET COVEREDED IN CHEETOS AND RATS AND STOOFS!"

"SHUT UP, GEN!" Tsuki shouts. "You love Mopiness of Doom. We get it."

Zack scratches his head. "I have no idea who I want to win…"

"VOTE FOR ZIM!" Zim shouts.

"CAN WE JUST GET STARTED ALREADY AND WOW THIS IS A LOT OF SCREAMING…" Ren screams. "_Gen_, **Tsuki**, get up there!"

The girls jump onstage with microphones.

"_You and I walk a fragile line  
>I have known it all this time<br>But I never thought I'd live to see it break_

**It's getting dark, and it's all too quiet  
>And I can't trust anything now<br>And it's coming over you like it's all a big mistake**

_Oh, I'm holding my breath  
><em>**Won't lose you again**  
><em>Something's made your eyes go cold<em>

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this  
>I thought I had you figured out<br>_Something's gone terribly wrong  
>You're all I wanted<br>_  
>Come on, come on, don't leave me like this<br>I thought I had you figured out  
><strong>Can't breathe whenever you're gone<br>Can't turn back now, I'm**haunted

**Stood there and watched you walk away  
>From everything we had<br>But I still mean every word I said to you**

_He would try to take away my pain  
>And he just might make me smile<br>But the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead_**  
><strong>  
><strong>Oh, I'm holding my breath<br>**_Won't see you again  
><em>**Something keeps me holding on to nothing**

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this  
>I thought I had you figured out<br>**Something's gone terribly wrong  
>You're all I wanted<strong>

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this  
>I thought I had you figured out<br>**Can't breathe whenever you're gone  
>Can't turn back now, I'm<strong>haunted

_I know,_ **I know**  
><em>I just know (<em>**I know, I know, I know)**  
>You're not gone<br>You can't be gone, no

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this  
>I thought I had you figured out<br>Something's gone terribly wrong  
>Won't finish what you started<p>

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this  
>I thought I had you figured out<br>Can't breathe whenever you're gone  
>Can't go back, I'm haunted<p>

**You and I walk a fragile line  
><strong>_I have known it all this time_  
><strong>Never ever thought I'd see it break<br>**_Never thought I'd see it-."_

APPLAUSE

GIR is humming along to a completely different song.

"Nice work. I really like the song choice," Ren says.

"Yeah, but I'd appreciate it if one of them DIDN'T WANT TO KILL ME," Zack pants.

"Please, take it personally," Tsuki winks.

"I LIKE TO SING-A 'BOUT TEH MOON-A AND TEH JUNE-A AND TEH SPRING-A!" GIR screams as he and MiMi twirl around in a circle.

Suddenly a SIR unit with purple eyes and a crosshatched mouth jumps on top of Ren.

"KOR! I didn't think you'd be here!" Ren laughs as KOR leaps onto Zack's head.

"GET OFF OF ME! REN! CALL OFF YOUR STUPID ROBOT!" Zack shouts as KOR takes his glasses and runs away.

Zack trips on a bug.

Zack falls into a random pit of lava.

And dynamite.

And scorpions.

Which are strangely not burned by the lava.

Five hours later he climbs out, alive but in very much pain.

"What. Is. WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!" Zack howls.

"I thought that was funny!" Gen giggles. "Now, Zim, shall we?"

"Yes. :)"

Everyone looks at them in shock and horror. "What are you two-"

"WE GONNA BLOW UP PART OF CANADA!" they yell at the same time.

"Just be back before Zim and Dib have to sing." But they are already gone.

Tak looks around bored. "So? What are we gonna do now?"

"TORTURE THE TALLEST!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

"TORTURE LARD NAR!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

"TORTURE ZACK!"

"TORTURE REN!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

"PANCAKES!"

"TORTURE DIB!"

This goes on for two more hours.

THE INVADER ZIM SINGING CHALLENGE WILL BE BACK AFTER THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK:

_(to the tune of the 'Happy Nappers' song)_

_Deadly weapons!  
>Deadly weapons!<br>And they love to DESTROY yooooouuu…!_

_Come and buy our deadly weapons of violence and doom! You won't be disappointed! UNLESS YOU BE DEAD!_

NOW BACK TO THE SHOW.

"ZIM! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" Zack hollers.

"We destroyed part of Canada with nuclear missiles. PATHETIC! PATHETIC EARTH LANDFORMS! CANADA IS NOTHING COMPARED TO ZIM!" Zim shouts.

"Wait… you two have access to nuclear missiles?" Purple asks warily.

"No, but Tsuki does."

Tsuki grins in a way that makes everyone back away…

Zack tosses a mike to both **Zim** and Dib. "Come on, D- guys! We need to do this!"

"Fine. But know this, Zack-human. If you bother me anymore A SMALL SECTION OF NORTHERN CANADA WILL NOT BE THE ONLY THING SMOLDERING IN RUIN!"

"ZIM!"

"Fine, fine, we're singing now."

"There might be something outside your window  
>But you just never know<br>There could be something right past the turnpike gates  
>But you'll just never know<p>

If my velocity starts to make you sweat,  
>Then just don't let go<br>And if their Heaven ain't got a vacancy  
>Then we just, then we just, then we just<br>Then we just get up and go!

Ladies and gentlemen:  
>Truth is now acceptable<br>Fame is now injectable  
>Process the progress<br>**This core is critical  
>Faith is unavailable<br>Lives become incredible  
>Now, please understand that,<strong>

I can't slow down  
>I won't be waiting for you<br>I can't stop now  
>Because I'm dancing<p>

This planet's ours to defend  
>Ain't got no time to pretend<br>Don't mess around,  
>This is our last chance<p>

If my velocity starts to make you sweat  
>Then just don't let go<br>'Cause the emergency room got no vacancy  
>And we just, and we just, and we just<br>And we just get up and go!

(Who) they want you to be  
>(Who) they wanted to see<br>(**Go) kill the party with me  
>And never go home<br>**(Who) they want you to be  
>(Who) they wanted to see<br>**Just leave the party with me, and never go home**

You're unbelievable  
>Ah, so unbelievable<br>Ah, you ruin everything  
><span>Oh, you better go home<span>  
><strong>I'm unbelievable<br>Yeah, I'm undefeatable  
>Yeah, let's ruin everything,<br>Blast it to the back row  
><strong>  
><strong>They sell presentable<br>Young, and so ingestible  
>Sterile and collectible<br>Safe, and I can't stand it**  
>This is a letter my word<br>Is the berretta  
>The sound of my vendetta<br>Against the ones who planned it

If my velocity starts to make you sweat  
>Then just don't let go<br>'Cause the emergency room got no vacancy  
>Tell me who do you trust,<br>Do you trust  
>And we just<br>Get up and go!

(Who) they want you to be  
>(Who) they wanted to see<br>(**Go) kill the party with me  
>And never go home<strong>  
>(Who) they want you to be<br>(Who) they wanted to see  
><strong>Just leave the party with me, and never go home<strong>

**You keep eternity,  
><strong>Give us the radio  
>Deploy the battery,<br>**We're taking back control  
>Engage the energy,<br>Light up the effigy  
><strong>No chance to take it slow,  
>By now I'm sure you<br>Know, know, know, know, know, know  
>(1, 2, 3, go!)<br>**Get up and go!**

(Who) they want you to be  
>(Who) they wanted to see<br>**(Go) kill the party with me  
>And never go home<br>**(Who) they want you to be  
>(Who) they wanted to see<br>**Just leave the party with me, and never go home**

Are we still having fun?  
><strong>Are you holding the gun?<strong>  
><span>Take the money and run<span>  
><strong>We'll never go home<strong>

I've got nothing to lose  
>You've got nothing to say<br>And we're leaving today  
>We'll never go home<p>

I think I'm gonna go now  
>I think I'm gonna go now<br>**I think I better go now  
>Gonna go now, gonna go now, gonna go now, gonna go now<strong>  
>Go now, gonna go now<br>Go home!"

APPLAUSE!

"WOO! WE BLEEPED THE NAUGHTY WORD AGAIN!" Gen screams in joy. "YOU GUYS ARE WICKED TOGETHER!"

Now, let us vote!

DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN VOTING DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUUUUNNNN!

Ren and Zack take the stage. "Tonight's special guest is… FALIPAY THE DINOSAUR!"

Falipay comes in, and waves.

Gen waves her arm frantically. "HAI! I REMEMBERS YOU!"

Tsuki nods. "Yeah. A fellow Dib-hater. He's over there if you want to squish his head."

"YES!" Falipay shouts as he runs over to kill Dib.

"HOLD IT!" Zack shouts. "ANNONCE THE WINNERS. NO KILLING."

"Killjoy…" say Ren, Tsuki, and Falipay in unison.

Falipay takes the stage. "Tonight's winners are… Zim and Dib!"

APPLAUSE!

"ZIM IS TRULY AMAZING! ZIM SHALL RULE YOU AAALLLLLLL!"

Dib kicks a dust bunny. "Do I even need to mention the fact that I was here again?"

"SILENCE, DIB! I AM GLOATING IN MY VICTORY! ALL SHALL BOW BEFORE-"

Falipay knocks Zim over.

Ren waves at the camera. "Bye people! We're gonna do violent things to Dib and Zack now!"

"WHAT?"

"BYE!"

* * *

><p><strong>Falipay is from pokekinz0520's awesome truth and dare fic, "Doomy IZ Questionare and Dares Thing!" It's hilarious!<strong>

**I OWN NO COPYRIGHTED JUNK.**

**I'm sorry for offending anyone about the blowing up Canada thing. I thought it'd be funny. Gen and Zim essploded the part of Canada near the Arctic Circle where harldy anyone lives. The majority of Canada's population lives within 100 miles of the U.S. Once again, I don't want to offend anyone. I assure you that, because this is fanfiction, Canada is not exploded. :)**


	19. Saving the Fanfic

**I own no copyrighted songs, lines, titles, or nuthin'. Please forgive me if my next update takes a while.**

* * *

><p>Five words. Zim. Gen. Running. Toilet. Plungers.<p>

Tsuki facepalms. "Why are you two running around with plungers?"

Gen stops in her tracks. "These aren't just any plungers."

"These are the plungers of DOOM!" Zim shouts, waving his PoD in the air.

The Tallest bang the heads of the wall, as does Lard Nar.

"Why did we ever make him an invader…?"

"Why did I let her join the Resisty…?"

Gen suddenly beats Red with her gummy bear sack.

"Oh, yeah, that's why. X3"

A man in a black suit and sunglasses walks into the room very official-like.

"Who are you supposed to be?" Tsuki asks disrespectfully.

"I am from the board of People in Dark Black Clothing's fan fiction department," the man says. He shall be called Mr. Black Suit Man. "The PIDBC has looked at your story and finds it unacceptably immature. Changes must be made immediately."

Everyone stands in shock for a moment. Finally, Purple raises his hand. "Wait, so do we get to go home?"

"That will be the consequence if our requirements are not met."

Dib raises an eyebrow. "What are the requirements?"

"Simple. Each chapter of this fan fiction must contain some sort of lesson, a classic song, a short skit, demotion of violence, and a theme and closing song. Tsuki and Jen-"

"It's GEN," Gen snaps. "As in again, not like in gender. Gen. GUH-EHN."

Mr. Black Suit Man adjusts his tie. "Very well, then. Tsuki and Gen, as the hosts, you must be able to meet these requirements, or The Invader Zim Singing Challenge will be shut down."

Mr. Black Suit man leaves the room, saying "I'll be following your work."

Everyone gathers in a huddle.

"So, what are we supposed to do?" Tak asks.

"Go home?"

"Red, sit in the corner."

"But-"

"IN THE CORNER."

Red sits in the corner.

Tsuki taps her chin. "We need to find a loophole in the rules."

Dib grins. "Yeah! We need to follow the new rules, but do it so that they don't get what they want."

Gen whispers something to GIR and Zim, then stands up. "Okay, so, we have a plan. All we need to do is follow the rules in an awesomesauce way."

They break out of the huddle.

"So, what's first?"

"THE THEMEY SONG!" GIR exclaims, holding up a piece of paper. "I WORTE IT MAHSELF!"

"Go ahead, GIR!" Tsuki shouts with glee.

"Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum WE BE SINGING TONIGHT!"

APPLAUSE

"Welcome, one and all, to the Invader Zim Singing Challenge!" exclaims _Gen_. Music begins to play softly in the background. "We've got a special show for y'all tonight."

**Tsuki **grins. "So what are we gonna sing about, Gen?"

"We're gonna sing about friends!"

"What kind of friends?"

"I'll show you!"

"_Who's there for you when you are sad and down_?

(Idiot Friends)

**Who picks you up and smacks you all around?**

(Idiot Friends)

_Who puts thorns in you so you can save the town?_

**Idiot friends, Idiot friends,  
><strong>  
>Idiot friends!<p>

_Da da da da, do da do da do,  
><em>  
>Idiot friends!<p>

_Da da da da, de, doo da da,  
><em>  
>Idiot friends!<p>

_Dee da da, doo-doo-doo, doh-doh!  
><em>  
><strong>You know, Gen,<strong>

All we've been a-doin' is singing about what I've done for you,

Well, what have you done for me?

_Who helps you sing about random stuff?_

**Oh, wow**.

_Let's bring it home, idiot friend!  
><em>  
><strong>Okay!<strong>

_Who lets you ride on her coffin?  
><em>  
><strong>Who slaps you hard and often?<strong>

_What do you and me have in common?  
><em>  
>We're idiot friends!"<p>

APPLAUSE

"Why did you two just call yourselves idiots?" Zim asks. "FURTHER PROOF THAT HYOOMANS ARE STEE-YOOPID!"

"We did it because it was part of the song," Tsuki whispers. "And this is part of the plan to stop this 'new rule' thing."

Dib thinks for a moment. "So, what's next on the list?"

"We need to demote violence," says Gaz. "That won't be easy."

"I know," Tak replies.

"What should we do?"

GIR smiles. "I HAS A IDEA!" He whispers it in Tsuki's ear.

"Y'know, that's a great idea, GIR!"

"AW, c'mere, little GIR-kun!" Gen squeals as she and GIR glomp each other.

"And now," Tsuki says. "It's time for IZSC's guide of violent things you should NOT do to people!"

"First, you should never use a high powered laser on someone and nearly burn them into toast, like this."

Zim shoots Dib with a high-powered laser that is very painful.

"Second, it's not right to push someone off a cliff, like so."

Gen pushes Red off the BRICK WALL OF HEAD-SLAMMINESS.

"And it's not like it's polite to, say, hit someone with a sack of gummy bears."

Gen hits Zim with a sack of gummy bears.

"See how mean it is? Of course, you also shouldn't use an electric swordfish."

Tak hits Zim with the ESoP.

"Or a waffle iron."

Gaz hits Dib with a waffle iron.

"Or a doomy kiwi turtle named Reggie."

Purple and Red hit each other with doomy kiwi turtles named Reggie and Reggie the Second.

"Or an emu."

"Wait, what is an emu?" Dib asks.

"It's a kind of bird," Gen says. "But we don't have one."

"IS THAT THE ONLY RANDOM THING YOU FILTHY HYOOMANS DO NOT HAVE?" Zim screams. "ZIM WANTS TO HIT THE DIB WITH THE PATHETIC EARTH FOWL!"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Uh-oh. You just promoted violence. We can't do that, Zim. Shame on you." She straightens her back. "Well, how about we move on? We have a treat for you tonight: Zim, Dib, Gaz, and GIR are going to put on a short play, or skit, for you. It is called… The Pickle Jar of Doom."

The curtain opens with Zim trying to open a pickle jar. Dib enters.

"What are you doing, Zim?"

"I am trying to open this pathetic jar of brined earth vegetables, but it cannot handle my amazingness and will not open."

Dib rolls his eyes. "You can't open a pickle jar?"

"Like you could!" sneers Zim. "Filthy human!"

Dib grabs the pickle jar and tries to open it, but fails epically.

"HA!" Zim laughs. "A PITIFUL failure! Stinking human!"

GIR comes in. "Mastah? You open mah pickles yet? I LAIK PICKLES!"

"No, GIR, the stupid jar will not open."

Gaz walks in, takes the jar from Dib, and opens it with a single light twist. The lid flies offstage. "Whiners. There. Your jar is open. Now stop being a bunch of annoying idiots. I'm trying to read."

GIR happily takes the jar from Gaz, who exits, and eats all of the pickles in one swallow. "DAT WUZ YUMMEH!"

Dib takes the jar. "Great. Now that you ate all my pickles, I guess we should throw this away."

"NOES! Save teh jar, Biggy Head! I wanna put taquitos in it and send 'em to MiMi!"

"Okay, now, where is that lid?"

"HA! The Dib worm is to pathetic and inferior to find the lid to the pickle jar? Stinking humans!" laughs Zim.

"Where is the lid? Where is the liiid? Where is the- Where is the- Where is the- Where is the liiiid? Does anyone know? Does anyone know? Does anyone know where is the liiid? Where is the lid? Where is the liiid? Where is the... Where is the... Where is the- Where is the liiid? Oh Wheeeere? Oh wheeere? Oh wheeere is the liiid? We can't find the liiiid!" GIR sings happily.

Zim looks offstage, finds the lid, and brings it back. "Dib-human, this proves that you are even more wretched than I thought. ZIM HAS FOUND THE LID!"

END SCENE

SLOW, HALF-HEARTED APPLAUSE EXCEPT FROM GEN BECAUSE, WELL, SHE'S GEN.

Gen grins. "GIR, now you should go work on phase two."

"OKIE DOKIE!" GIR shouts, flying through the ceiling with MiMi.

"What's on the list now?" Gaz asks.

"A classic song. Dib, you're up!" Gen giggles. "This is gonna be awesomesauce!"

Dib takes the MoD and begins to sing.

"Help, I need somebody  
>Help, not just anybody<br>Help, you know I need someone  
>Help!<p>

When I was younger, so much younger than today  
>I never needed anybody's help in any way<br>But now these days are gone I'm not so self-assured  
>Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors<p>

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down  
>And I do appreciate you being 'round<br>Help me get my feet back on the ground  
>Won't you please, please help me?<p>

And now my life has changed in oh so many ways  
>My independence seems to vanish in the haze<br>But every now and then I feel so insecure  
>I know that I just need you like I've never done before<p>

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down  
>And I do appreciate you being 'round<br>Help me get my feet back on the ground  
>Won't you please, please help me?<p>

When I was younger, so much younger than today  
>I never needed anybody's help in any way<br>But now these days are gone I'm not so self-assured  
>Now I find I've changed my mind, I've opened up the doors<p>

Help me if you can, I'm feeling down  
>And I do appreciate you being 'round<br>Help me get my feet back on the ground  
>Won't you please, please help me?<br>Help me, help me, ooooooo…"

APPLAUSE

"Like I said: awesomesauce. X3" Gen says.

Mr. Black Suit Man enters angrily. "This is all wrong! You people are morons! You were too silly! You were violent! You sang about idiots being friends! Your skit was in no way tasteful! What is wrong with you?"

"Actually, we followed your rules," says Tsuki. "We acknowledged that doing violent things is wrong."

"You didn't say our skit had to be artsy," says Tak.

"And we taught about how friends support each other," Gen says.

"And we had a theme song and a classic Beatles song," says Tsuki smugly. "So don't complain!"

A large metal man in a black suit and sunglasses enters. "**Hello. I am government man. I come from the government. The government has sent me." **He walks up to Mr. Black Suit Man. "**Hello. I think that The Invade Zim Singing Challenge should be left the way it was. Please leave and go to magical candy world and neeeeevverr come back. Toodles!"**

Mr. Black Suit Man clutches his head in his hands. "I can't take you crazy people anymore! Go back to your old fic for all I care! AGH!" He leaves.

MEGA APPLAUSE!

"This is awesome! We got IZSC back!" Gen cheers.

GIR and MiMi pop out of the Sovernment Man suit. "YAYZ!"

"And just in time for next chapter… THE IZSC 20TH CHAPTER EXTRAVABANANZA!"

"See you there!" Shouts Gen. "GIR! Close us out with our credits song!"

"Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum NEXT CHAPPIE'S GONNA BE AWESOME!"


	20. 20th Chapter Extravabananza!

**Hello, everyone! Sorry for the long update, but the IZSC 20th Chapter Extravabanaza is here! It turns out that you actually aren't allowed to use copyrighted songs on FF, so after this chapter, I'm going to try to write my own lyrics. And instead of bak602, you can call me Blake (It's an alias so HA!)!**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter! Let's start it all with a little song...**

* * *

><p>"I've hoped for change and it gets better everyday<br>I've hoped for change but still I feel the same  
>There's something wrong 'cause everybody knows<br>That we can do this on our own

And we've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<br>We've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<p>

We're doing fine and it gets better every time  
>We're doing fine but I'll let you decide<br>There's something wrong 'cause everybody knows  
>That we can do this on our own<p>

And we've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<br>We've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<p>

And I'll confess that I can be a little selfish  
>Yeah, I'll admit<br>I don't want you to help me through this  
>I don't want to start over again<p>

And we've got everybody singing

And we've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<br>And we've got everybody singing  
>Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa<p>

And I'll confess that I can be a little selfish  
>I can, I can, yeah, I'll admit<br>I don't want you to get me through this  
>I don't want to start over again!"<p>

Tsuki and Gen enter in award show-like dresses, each with their own style. They both smile and grab microphones.

"Hello, and welcome to the IZSC 20th Chapter Extravabananza!"

APPLAUSE!

"Give a round of applause to… the cast of Invader Zim!"

APPLAUSE as the camera pans through the cast's seats.

"Tonight," Tsuki says, "We are going to have more singing and MADNESS than ever before! You will be seeing our fan favorite single competitor and our favorite duet pairs each performing, as well as some special surprises that we've planned. And in addition… EVERYONE WILL BE SINGING TONIGHT!"

Gen speaks quickly into her mike. "_Dakedo saisho, ware-ware daro miseru-_"

"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, GEN-HUMAN, NO ONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT ON IRK YOU ARE SAYING!" Zim screams.

"_Hatenaki yume motomeru shirube naki sekai de-_"

"And just because we can't understand you doesn't mean we don't know when you're saying the words to the Tsubasa theme song."

"_Sumimasen._ What I was saying (before the theme song thing) was that we're going to start by presenting a special new thingy we got. GIR, the curtain!"

GIR pulls a curtain away to reveal a statue of Tsuki and Gen fighting over a gummy bear sack surrounded by the cast.

"This was given to us by one of our reviewers! Thank you!" Tsuki says- GASP! - cheerfully!

Gen stares at it.

"I think I know what's coming…" Dib says under his breath.

"WE MUST GIVE IT A NAME!"

Zim raises his hand.

"ZIMMEH! What is your suggestion?"

"THE STATUE OF ZIM!"

"It's not of just you, you idiot," Tak growls.

"I say we call it the Dib Memorial," Dib suggests.

"Zim likes his name better."

"I didn't ask you your opinion, Space Boy!"

"I DO NOT CARE! YOUR HEAD IS LARGE AND STUPID!"

"SILENCE!" Gen screams. "NO MORE ARGUING OVER THE STATUE OF MADNESS!"

"Great. Now it has a name," Tsuki snaps. "Now, EVERYONE SHUT UP SO THAT WE CAN GET ON TO OUR FIRST SINGERS OF THE NIGHT! First up are… THE TALLEST!"

The Tallest get onstage.

"You show us everything you've got  
>You keep on dancin' and the room gets hot<br>You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy  
>You say you wanna go for a spin<br>The party's just begun, we'll let you in  
>You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy<br>You keep on shoutin', you keep on shoutin'

I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<br>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<p>

You keep on saying you'll be mine for a while  
>You're lookin' fancy and I like your style<br>You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy  
>You show us everything you've got<br>Baby, baby that's quite a lot  
>And you drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy<br>You keep on shoutin', you keep on shoutin'

I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<br>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<br>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<br>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day  
>I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day<br>I wanna rock and roll!"

"WHY IS THAT SONG SO AWESOME?" Gen shrieks, pulling a lampshade off her head.

"LAMPEHSHADE!" GIR laughs, doing the same thing.

Suddenly, a loud onslaught of shouting is heard from the hallway.

"I think I know who's here…" Tsuki moans.

Ren and Zack enter yelling at each other.

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT WE'RE LATE!"

"REALLY? WE'RE LATE BECAUSE I NEEDED TO GET ONE LITTLE THING FOR MY HAIR AND NOT BECAUSE YOU TOOK TWENTY MINUTES TO PEE AND PUT A STUPID TRENCH COAT OVER YOUR TUX?"

"IT DID NOT TAKE TWENTY MINUTES!"

"Okay, fifteen minutes. WHO CARES?"

"SILENCE!" Tsuki shouts.

They fall quiet even though Ren punches Zack in the gut.

"THANK you," Tsuki says, "for being late."

"Sorry," Ren pants. "What'd we miss?"

"Just a FILTHY statue unveiling and the Almighty Tallest's performace." Zim says.

"Oh, just the Tallest? Good."

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'JUST THE TALLEST'?" Red shouts angrily.

Gen suddenly twitches angrily and starts beating them with her gummy bear sack. "VENGENCE SHALL BE MINE! HE SHALL BE AVENGED!"

"WHA- OW! ARE-OW! YOU-OW! DOIN-OWWWWWIE!" Purple hollers.

"YOU KILLED ZIMMEH!"

"NO WE DIDN'T (though we would LOVE to…)- OWW!" Red shrieks like a pathetic little girl.

"LIES!"

Tsuki nonchalantly sips a Mountain Dew. "Oh, she read some angsty fanfiction that made her REALLY mad at you guys. For the record, don't be around fangirls who read things with character deaths. Now, may I move on? Our next singer is Gaz."

Gaz holds up the MoD and begins.

"Little girl, terrified  
>She'd leave her room if only bruises would heal<br>A home is no place to hide  
>Her heart is breaking from the pain that she feels<p>

Every day's the same, she fights to find her way  
>She hurts, she breaks, she hides and tries to pray<br>She wonders why  
>Does anyone ever hear her when she cries?<p>

Today she's turning sixteen  
>Everyone singing but she can't seem to smile<br>They never get past arms length  
>How could they act like everything is alright?<p>

Pulling down her long sleeves  
>To cover all the memories that scars leave<br>She says, 'Maybe making me bleed  
>Will be the answer that could wash the slate clean?'<p>

Every day's the same, she fights to find her way  
>She hurts, she breaks, she hides and tries to pray<br>She wonders why  
>Does anyone ever hear her when she cries?<p>

This is the dark before the dawn  
>The storm before the peace<br>Don't be afraid 'cause seasons change  
>And God is watching over you, He hears you<p>

And every day's the same, she fights to find her way  
>She hurts, she breaks, she hides and tries to pray<br>She'll be just fine  
>'Cause I know He hears her when she cries<p>

Every day's the same, she fights to find her way  
>She hurts, she breaks, she hides and tries to pray<br>She'll be just fine  
>'Cause I know He hears her when she cries<br>She'll be just fine  
>'Cause I know He hears her when she cries."<p>

APPLAUSE!

"That... that was beautiful," Tsuki whispers. "Even through the angst moments, there is always hope. Never be afraid to get spiritual."

"Aren't we mentioning angst a little too much?" Dib asks.

"Some people like angst-" Gaz begins threateningly.

"But it's unhealthy and it's not good to dwell on. We need some happiness in our lives, as well, or-" Gen is silenced by Gaz punching her through a wall.

Everyone takes a step away from Gaz, as they all wish to keep their limbs.

"Okay, so, we need something to cheer everyone up," Tsuki says thoughtfully.

"Push Zim and Dib off a cliff?" says Tak.

"Nah… I was thinking more along the lines of fun, whimsical, insane in a good way…"

"All the words you use to describe me!" Gen chirps proudly.

"…Yeah, that. Now, what music artist do you like that does some of that stuff? C'mon, you know it…"

"WEIRD AL YANKOVIC!"

"Bingo!" Tsuki cheers. "And who here would be perfect for cheering us up?"

MiMi holds up GIR's hand.

"And, GIR, what do you want right now, more than anything?"

"TACOS!" GIR screams in GIR-ish joy.

"C'mon up here!" Tsuki shouts.

GIR grabs the MoD, attempts to eat it, is stopped by Zim, and begins:

"Taco... grande. Taco... grande

Yo quiero chimichangas y chile colorado  
>Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado<br>Las flautas y tamales, siempre muy bueno  
>Y el chile relleno<p>

You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada  
>That's right, I want the whole enchilada<br>My only addiction has to do with a flour tortilla  
>I need a quesadilla<p>

I love to stuff my face with tacos al carbón  
>With my friends, or when I'm all alone<br>Yo tengo mucho hambre y ahora lo quiero  
>Un burrito ranchero<p>

So give me something spicy and hot, now  
>Break out the menu, what you got, now?<br>Oh, would you tell the waiter I'd like to have sour cream on the side  
>You better make sure the beans are refried<p>

Taco... grande. Taco... grande

Well, there's not a taco big enough for a man like me  
>That's why I order two or three<br>Let me give you a tip, just try a nacho chip  
>It's really good with bean dip<p>

I eat uno, dos, tres, quarto burritos  
>Pretty soon I can't fit in my Speedos<br>Well, I hope they feed us lots of chicken fajitas  
>And a pitcher of margaritas<p>

Well, the combination plates all come with beans and rice  
>The taquitos here are very nice<br>Now I'm down on my knees, we need some extra tomatoes and cheese  
>And could you make that separate checks, please?<p>

Taco... grande. Taco... grande

"Buenos noches, senor.  
>bienvenido a el burritos casa de salsa.<br>tenemos muchos platos muy sabrosos si puedo  
>recomendar el ardiente pollo al infierno muy delicioso.<br>sus ojos se quemaran, su estomago estara en fuego,  
>se quedaran en el baño por una semana,<br>entiendes lo que digo gringo estupido tonto?"  
>Well, the food is coming, I can hardly wait<br>Now watch your fingers, careful hot plate!  
>What you think you're doing with my chile con queso?<br>Well, if you want some, just say so

Oh boy, pico de gallo  
>They sure don't make it like this in Ohio<br>No gracias, yo quiero jalepeños, nada más  
>You can toss away the hot sauce<p>

?Donde estan los nachos? Holy frijole!  
>You better get me a bowl of guacamole<br>Y Uusted, Eugene? Why's your face turning green?  
>Don't you like pinto beans?<p>

You want some more cinnamon crispas?  
>If you don't, hasta la vista<br>Just take the rest home in a doggie bag if you wanna  
>You can finish it mañana<p>

Well, it's been a pleasure, I can't eat no more  
>Señor, la cuenta, por favor<br>If you ain't tried real Mexican cooking, well, you oughta  
>Just don't drink the water!<p>

Taco…Grande. Taco…Grande!"

APPLAUSE!

"Weird Al and GIR are epic win!" Gen cheers as the Tallest sulk in the corner after their severe beating.

"So… now what do we do?" Dib asks. "Are we going to jump right into the next song?"

"No, we need more pointless banter to attempt to make the readers laugh…" Tsuki mumbles.

Zim opens his mouth.

"NO, we are not making Dib explode." Gen snaps.

"WHY NOT?" Ren, Zim, Tak, Tsuki, the Tallest, and Gaz scream at once.

"BECAUSE IN THIS FIC WE DO NOT MURDER PEOPLE." Gen says strictly. "KILLING OTHERS IS NOT POLITE."

"Or politically correct." Zack says, folding his arms.

"Being politically correct is for people with no spines," Ren replies.

"OF COURSE, you two start to argue." Gaz says with an eye roll. "This is getting REALLY annoying."

"I actually find it mildly entertaining," Tak says, and MiMi nods.

Ren and Zack glare at each other.

"Maybe it'd be better if SOMEONE would hurry up and write our story's sequel so that we wouldn't have to argue in an unrelated story…"

ONE AUTHOR'S TRIP TO THE CORNER OF EXILE LATER…

"Wait, when did you guys name the corner?" Dib asks.

"WHY MUST YOU ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS?" Tsuki groans. "WE named it just now."

…

"You people are all insane," Red mutters.

"NOT TRUE!" Gen snaps.

The phone rings. Tsuki answers. "What do you want? … Oh. Gen, it's the asylum people again."

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL THEM THAT I AM SANE?" she screams. "Ugh… tell them to look over my screening test again."

"Why-"

"The people from that asylum are IDJITS," Gen mumbles. "There, Mr. Purple Tall guy, happy?"

"Well, so-rry."

"You should be."

"Uh, how about we continue with the show story thingy that I still don't understand how we're videotaping?" Dib says awkwardly.

"Fine," Tsuki says. "I think… it's time for me and Gen."

"You're really singing again?" Zim asks.

"Yep! We picked an awesome song, too!" Gen grins. "But… we'll need someone to stall while we get into costume."

"MEEEE! PICK MEH!" GIR screams so loud that he gets the job.

"K, GIR! DON'T PUSH PEOPLE OFF THE CLIFF OF DOOM!"

…

"Cliff of doom?" Dib asks warily. "Where is the-"

"BIGGEH HEAD! YOU GOTS DA PANCAKES I ORDERED?"

"GIR! There will be no pancake eating! Finish the STOOPID fan-fik-shun so we can go home!" Zim shouts.

"Aw, but I like it here, Mastah!"

"OBEY MEEEEEE!"

GIR grins stupidly but adorably. "MASTAH NEEDS A HUUUUUUGGG!" HE then proceeds to tackle his master to the floor while the Irken in question screams for his little life.

Dib records the scene on his camcorder, which Gaz crushes underfoot. The Tallest use the confusion to try to escape, but they are stopped by Lard Nar, who enjoys seeing their sheer pain at just being in the studio. GIR eventually gives up on hugging Zim and cuddles with MiMi as Tak uses Zim's vulnerability to beat him up. And then rainbow tacos fall from the sky as a response to the question that was in the summary of this story but was never answered.

Dib randomly cries.

"We're reeeeeadyyyyy!"

"Stop talking like that."

"'Kay."

The curtain opens and **Tsuki** and _Gen_ are wearing all black with red and orange accents.

"How did she dye that thing in her hair that quickly?" Lard Nar whispers. His question is ignored as the stage's lights and effects come on.

Tsuki smiles evilly (It's becoming a pattern, isn't it?). "This is for…I dunno. The song's just awesomesauce."

Gen is silenced by a glare before continuing. "Now…get ready to…

"CRUSHCRUSHCRUSH!"

"**I got a lot to say to you  
>Yeah, I got a lot to say<br>I noticed your eyes are always glued to me  
>Keeping them here<br>And it makes no sense at all**

They taped over your mouth  
>Scribbled out the truth with their lies<br>You little spies

They taped over your mouth  
>Scribbled out the truth with their lies<br>You little spies

**Crush**, _crush_, **crush  
>Crush, crush<br>**_(Two, three, four)  
><em>  
>Nothing compares to<br>_A quiet evening alone  
><em>Just the one, two  
><strong>I was just counting on<br>**  
>That never happens<br>_I guess I'm dreaming again_  
>Let's be more than this<p>

_If you want to play it like a game  
>Well, come on, come on, let's play<br>'Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending  
>Than have to forget you for one whole minute<em>

They taped over your mouth  
>Scribbled out the truth with their lies<br>You little spies

They taped over your mouth  
>Scribbled out the truth with their lies<br>You little spies

_Crush_, **crush**, _crush  
>Crush, crush<br>_**(Two, three, four)**

Nothing compares to  
><strong>A quiet evening alone<br>**Just the one, two  
><em>I was just counting on<em>

That never happens  
><strong>I guess I'm dreaming again<strong>  
>Let's be more than <strong>this now!<strong>

**Rock and roll, baby  
>Don't you know<br>That we're all alone now?  
>I need something to sing about<strong>

Rock and roll, hey  
>Don't you know, baby<em><br>We're all alone now?  
>I need something to sing about<br>_  
>Rock and roll, hey<br>Don't you know, baby**  
>We're all alone now?<br>**_Give me something to sing about!_**  
><strong>  
>Nothing compares to<br>_A quiet evening alone_  
>Just the one, two<br>**I was just counting on**

That never happens  
><em>I guess I'm dreaming again<br>_Let's be more than  
><strong>No ohh<br>**  
>Nothing compares to<br>_A quiet evening alone_**  
><strong>Just the one, two  
><strong>I was just counting on<strong>

That never happens  
><em>I guess I'm dreaming again<br>_Let's be more than  
>More than this."<p>

APPLAUSE

Gen immediately starts hopping around with joy and excitement and is magically wearing a GIR T-shirt. "I LOVE THAT SONG!"

"You love every song," Tak mumbles.

"I DON'T CARE!"

Tsuki taps her chin. "What to do next…?"

Zim raises his hand.

"WE ARE NOT PUSHING ALL OF HUMANITY OFF A CLIFF."

"YOU PEOPLE HAVE NO TASTE IN ENTERTAINMENT!"

"Hmmm… I think that we should have a Zim and Dib battle!" Gen says cheekily.

Tak grabs blindfolds and puts them on each of their heads, blocking their vision. She then hits them both over the head with a steel pole. "Find out who did it."

Zim and Dib immediately start to beat each other.

The Tallest once again try to escape while everyone's attention is on the rivals.

"C'mon, we're almost out of here!" Red whispers.

"But I left my snacks on the stage!"

"Forget about the snacks! We'll get more once we're back on the Massive away from this 'extravabananza' thing."

Gen notices the snacks sitting on the stage and instantly knows that the Tallest are escaping, as they would never leave snacks behind. She notifies Tsuki, who whispers into a microphone, "Let him out."

"Come on, hurry up!" Red snaps.

"I'm hurrying!" Purple replies.

"HERE'S JOHNNY!"

Johnny the Homicidal Maniac appears. Red and Purple run terrified to their seats, screaming for their lives.

"W-why… WHY IS NNY HERE?" Gen screams.

Tsuki grins. "You always pick the special guests, so I took the liberty of inviting Johnny here for security reasons. 'Sup, Nny?"

"Hey," the psychopathic murderer says.

"JUST REMEMBER WHAT I WILL DO IF YOU DON'T BEHAVE, NNY…"

Nny gulps. "R-right…"

"WHAT CAN YOU POSSIBLY DO THAT WOULD MAKE NNY SCARED?" Gen asks, freaking out.

"You don't want to know…" Tsuki perks up. "Well, that's surprise number one!"

"THERE'S MORE? HOW LONG UNTIL WE GET TO LEAVE?" Zim hollers.

"Something tells me that this is only the tip of the iceberg," Dib grumbles.

"ZIM DOES NOT CARE ABOUT FROZEN LIQUID MASSES! ZIM WANTS TO GO HOME!"

"IT'S AN EXPRESSION!"

"YOU THINK I CARE? I WILL BLOW YOU INTO SMITHEREENS!"

"I LIKE WAFFLEZ!"

"BRING IT ON, SPACE BOY! JUST TRY!"

"I WILL! Believe me, Dib… I WILL!"

Tak and Gaz sit in the corner eating popcorn, amused. Everyone else begins to _chant_ "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"

Zim and Dib begin hitting, kicking, shooting lasers at each other, screaming their little tushies off, and-

"CARAMELL DANCEN!"

"_Wonder are you ready to join us now?  
>Hands in the air, we will show you how.<br>Come and try,  
>Caramell will be your guide (be your guide)!"<em>

Zim looks around, confused, at the members of the party (GIR, MiMi, Gen, Ren, and Tsuki) who have begun caramell dancing. "WHAT IS THIS CARAMEL THING?"

"IT IS CARAMELL DANCEN!" GIR shouts. Dib, Nny, Tak, Zack, and (GASP!) Gaz begin to dance (though she does it with no enthusiasm). "DO IT, MASTAH! IT BE FUN!"

"_So come and move your hips sing  
>Wa-ah-ah<br>Look at you two hips do it  
>La-la-la<br>You and me, can sing this melody!"_

Zim folds his arms. "I will NOT participate in this miserable display of arm flapping and hand waving."

"DO THE CARAMELL DANCEN, ZIM!" Gen shouts.

"_Owah-owah-ah-oh_

Dance to the beat,  
>Wave your hands together<br>Come feel the heat, forever and forever.  
>Listen and Learn<br>It is time for prancing,  
>Now we are here with Caramel Dancing!"<p>

"NO!" Zim shouts.

"Pleeeeeease, Mastah?" GIR begs.

"NEVER!"

GIR latches onto Zim's limbs and forces him to Caramelldancen.

"GIR! WHAT ARE YOU-"

"_O-o-owah-owah_

O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh

O-o-owah-owah

O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh

From Sweden to Uk, we will bring our song.  
>Australia, USA, and you people at Hong Kong<br>They have heard,  
>This means all around the world.<p>

O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh

Now come on and move your hips singing  
>Wa-ah-ah<br>Look at you two hips do it  
>La-la-la<br>You and me, can sing this melody

So come and  
>Dance to the beat<br>Wave your hands together  
>Come feel the heat, forever and forever.<br>Listen and Learn  
>It is time for prancing,<br>Now we are here with Caramel Dancing

Dance to the beat  
>Wave your hands together<br>Come feel the heat, forever and forever.  
>Listen and Learn<br>It is time for prancing,  
>Now we are here with Caramel Dancing<p>

O-o-owah-owah

O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh

O-o-owah-owah

O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh

So come and  
>Dance to the beat<br>Wave your hands together  
>Come feel the heat, forever and forever.<br>Listen and Learn  
>It is time for prancing,<br>Now we are here with Caramel Dancing

Dance to the beat  
>Wave your hands together<br>Come feel the heat, forever and forever.  
>Listen and Learn<br>It is time for prancing,  
>Now we are here with Caramel Dancing!"<p>

APPLAUSE!

"Wasn't that fun, Mastah?" GIR asks cheerfully.

"NO! AND GET OFF OF ZIM!" Zim shouts back. GIR giggles, runs away and continues to dance with MiMi.

Dib rolls his eyes. "Really? You didn't have ANY fun? Everyone else did."

"NO, ZIM DID NOT HAVE FUN! IT WAS A PITIFUL, ANNOYING, HORRIBLE, AND… WACKY EXPERIENCE!"

Nny suddenly snaps to attention.

Tsuki facepalms. "Here we go again…"

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU [symbols] WOULD EVEN DARE TO [symbols] EVEN CONSIDER TO [symbols] BE SUCH A [LOTS OF SYMBOLS] AND [symbols] WITH ALL YOUR [symbols] I JUST WANT TO [symbols] TO YOUR [THERE CAN NEVER BE ENOUGH SYMBOLS]!"

Tsuki shoves Johnny into a straight jacket and pushes him out the door, where he is quickly picked up by the Crazy House for Boys, who soon give up on treating the psychotic killer.

"Well, that had a happy ending to surprises one and two," Tak says, rolling her eyes.

"At least no one got killed!" Gen chirps. She then begins to speak in a nature show announcer voice. "_The wild, ferocious jungle that is the Invader Zim Singing Challenge studio. Here, it is eat or be eaten, do or die, sing or sing and be embarrassed for all eternity! You never know who will win, who will lose, and who will get run over by a large military fighter plane."_

Red and Purple get run over by a large military fighter plane.

"_Well, that answers that question."_

Ren pokes the Tallest with a stick. "THEY'RE ALIVE! …I think."

Tsuki thinks for a minute. "Y'know, at the beginning, we said that everyone would sing, but you know who hasn't sung the entire time they've been here?"

"Lard Nar?"

"BESIDES HIM."

…

"Ren and Zack," she sighs. "They should do it now. Plus, I know some of our readers have also read your story, so… knock yourselves out."

The two glare at each other. "Bring it on," Zack growls.

"Fine, I will," Ren laughs, grabbing the MoD.

"WAIT! Who said you get to go first?"

"No one. But I'm doing it," she replies with a cocky grin. Energetic rock music begins to play.

"No sir, well, I don't wanna be the blame, not anymore  
>It's your turn, so take a seat<br>We're settling the final score  
>And why do we like to hurt so much?<p>

I can't decide, you have made it harder  
>Just to go on<br>And why, all the possibilities  
>Well, I was wrong<p>

That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<br>That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

I drowned out all my sense  
>With the sound of its beating<br>And that's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

I wonder, how am I supposed to feel  
>When you're not here?<br>'Cause I burned every bridge I ever built  
>When you were here<p>

I still try holding onto silly things  
>I never learn<br>Oh why, all the possibilities  
>I'm sure you've heard<p>

That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<br>That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

I drowned out all my sense  
>With the sound of its beating<br>And that's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

Pain, make your way to me, to me  
>And I'll always be just so inviting<br>If I ever start to think straight  
>This heart will start a riot in me<br>Let's start, start, hey!

Why do we like to hurt so much?  
>Oh, why do we like to hurt so much?<br>That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<br>That's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa<p>

Now I can't trust myself  
>With anything but this<br>And that's what you get  
>When you let your heart win, whoa!"<p>

APPLAUSE

Zack stands there for a minute, and then rolls his eyes. "You're really vindictive, aren't you?"

Ren shrugs. "We all know that I hate you, Zack. Plus, THAT IS AN AWESOME SONG."

"I know, right?" Tsuki and Gen say excitedly.

Ren throws the MoD at Zack's face. "Your turn. Try not to make our ears vomit too much."

Zack angrily clutches the MoD and walks onto the stage.

"Please take a long hard look through your textbook  
>'Cause I'm history<br>When I strap my helmet on I'll be long gone  
>'Cause I've been dying to leave<p>

Yeah, I'll ride the range and hide  
>All my loose change in my bedroom<br>'Cause riding a dirt bike down  
>A turnpike always takes its toll on me<p>

I've had just about enough of quote  
>"Diamonds in the rough"<br>Because my backbone is paper thin  
>Get me out of this cavern or I'll cave in<p>

If the bombs go off, the sun will still be shining  
>Because we've heard it said that<br>Every mushroom cloud has a silver lining  
>Though I'm always undermining too deep to know<p>

Swallow a drop of gravel and blacktop  
>'Cause the road tastes like wintergreen<br>The wind and the rain smell of oil and octane  
>Mixed with stale gasoline<p>

I'll soak up the sound, try to sleep on the wet ground  
>I'll get ten minutes give or take<br>'Cause I just don't foresee myself getting drowsy  
>When cold integrity keeps me wide awake<p>

Get me out of this cavern or I'll cave in  
>Get me out of this cavern or I'll cave in<p>

I'll keep my helmet on just in case my head caves in  
>'Cause if my thoughts collapse or my framework snaps<br>It'll make a mess like you wouldn't believe

Tie my handlebars to the stars so I stay on track  
>And if my intentions stray I'll wrench them away<br>Then I'll take my leave and I won't even look back  
>I won't even look back."<p>

"WAIT A SEC…" Dib says. "Did that song say to eat part of the street or something?"

"ARTISTS ARE WEIRD PEOPLE." Gen shouts. "HOW DO YOU THINK THIS STORY GOT TO BE THE WAY IT IS?"

GIR jumps up and down. "WHUH WE GONNA DO NOW?"

Tsuki taps her chin. "I think it's about time for surprise number three. I need Zim to stand here, and Gen to stand here."

The Tallest set them up so that they're about a yard away from each other. Purple moves to Gen's side and Red to Zim's.

"What are you-"

"NOW!"

Gen and Zim are pushed toward each other so that they kiss.

Zim pulls away, screams and spits repeatedly. "WHAT WAS THAT?"

Tsuki laughs. "Aww… Is someone sad that it wasn't Tak?"

"NO."

Gen runs around in a circle. "OMG MY FIRST KISS WAS WITH ZIMMEH! I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT HE LIKES TAK AND NOT ME CUZ I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM BUT WOOOOOOO!"

Zim goes in the corner and vomits while others laugh.

Gen smiles and wipes a tear from her eye. "Oh, man, that was awesome! Now, Zim, we all know that you're upset, but we'll make it up to you!"

The Irken folds his arms. "How so?"

Dib and GIR push **Zim** and _Tak_ onto the stage and force microphones in their hands as music begins to play.

"We're gonna have you guys perform that little song we taught you."

"_You were in college working part time waiting tables  
>Left a small town, never looked back<br>I was a flight risk with a fear of falling  
>Wondering why we bother with love if it never lasts<em>

**I say can you believe it?  
>As we're lying on the couch<strong>  
><strong>The moment I could see it<br>**_Yes, yes, I can see it now_

Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?  
>You put your arm around me for the first time<br>_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter  
><em>You are the best thing that's ever been mine

_Flash forward and we're taking on the world together  
>And there's a drawer of my things at your place<br>You learn my secrets and you figure out why I'm guarded  
>You say we'll never make my parents' mistakes<br>_  
><strong>But we got bills to pay<br>We got nothing figured out  
>When it was hard to take<br>Yes, yes, this is what I thought about**

Do you remember we were sitting there by the water?  
>You put your arm around me for the first time<br>_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter  
><em>You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Do you remember all the city lights on the water?  
>You saw me start to believe for the first time<br>_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter  
><em>You are the best thing that's ever been mine

_And I remember that fight, 2:30 a.m.  
>As everything was slipping right out of our hands<br>I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street_

Braced myself for the goodbye  
>'Cause that's all I've ever known<br>Then you took me by surprise  
>You said<p>

**I'll never leave you alone**

You said I remember how we felt sitting by the water  
>And every time I look at you, it's like the first time<br>I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter  
>She is the best thing that's ever been mine<p>

Hold on, make it last  
>Hold on, never turn back<em><br>You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_  
>You are the best thing that's ever been mine<p>

_Do you believe it?_  
><strong>We're gonna make it now<strong>  
><strong>I can see it<strong>  
><em>I can see it now."<em>

APPLAUSE!

Gen, Ren and Tsuki break down weeping with joy.

"It's just… So… AAAAAAHHHH!" Gen cries. "I LOVE IT!"

Tak slaps Zim in the face.

"…And that just ruined it," Tsuki laughs. "But I bet SOMEONE is happy!"

"ZIM FOUND NO PLEASURE IT THAT!"

"We all know you did."

"LIES! LLLLIIIIIIEEESSSS!"

APPLAUSE!

…

"What was that for?"

"We all enjoy watching you deny the truth."

Zim twitches with anger.

"Okaaayyy… MOVING ON!" Gen yells. "Who still has to sing?"

Tsuki looks down at the list. "Dib… Zim… Tak… and the minor characters."

Lard Nar looks up suddenly. "Wait, what?"

Dib crosses his arms. "Dude, you've been hanging around since the first chapter and haven't sung AT ALL."

The Tallest laugh uncontrollably as they eat doughnuts. "Yeah!" Purple says. "It's your turn!"

"Everyone else has had to suffer," Red sneers.

Skoodge salutes. "My Tallest, I am honored to sing with the enemy if it will help the empire!"

Red looks around. "Can we kill him?"

"NO."

Zim pushes Dib off a random cliff into a pit full of dynamite but lives.

"ZIM! WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE?" shrieks Gen. "KILLING PEOPLE IS GENERALLY FROWNED UPON."

Gaz raises an eyebrow. "But what about that Jhonny kid?"

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "He has fans, but he's an insane maniacal guy who has…problems."

"DO YOU KNOW HIM OR SOMETHING?" Dib, magically out of the pit, shouts. "Because if you do, this will NOT end well."

"For once, you said something smart, Dib…" Tsuki says maliciously…

Everyone takes a step back.

"Nonetheless, Skoodge will be singing tonight and WILL NOT BE MURDERED."

The Tallest go into the corner and cry.

"Anyways, GET ON WITH IT!"

Skoodge, MiMi, Lard Nar, and Membrane get up and grab microphones.

"Mr. Sun came up and he smiled at me  
>Said it's gonna be a good one just wait and see<br>Jumped out of bed and I ran outside  
>Feeling so extra exsatisfied<p>

It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<br>It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<p>

I'm so busy got nothing to do  
>Spent the last two hours just tying my shoe<br>Every flower, every grain of sand  
>Is reaching out to shake my hand<p>

It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<br>It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<p>

Sometimes the little things start closing in on me  
>When I'm feeling down I wanna lose that frown<br>I stick my head out the window and I look around

Those clouds don't scare me, they can't disguise  
>This magic that's happening right before my eyes<p>

Soon Mr. Moon will be shining bright  
>So the best day ever can last all night<br>Yes, the best day ever's gonna last all night now

It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<br>It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<p>

It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<br>It's the best day ever  
>(Best day ever)<p>

Best day ever  
>Best day ever!"<p>

APPLAUSE!

"Random SpongeBob song is random," Gen smiles.

"AH LAIK SPONGEHBOB!" GIR cheers. "HE BE ALL FUNNEH AND NIIICE! Like a taco monkeh!"

Tsuki checks the word count. "Dude! This thing is over 5,700 words so far! This is awesome! LONGEST CHAPTER EVER! And if anyone tries to escape again…"

GIR points to the Tallest who are trying to escape as she speaks.

Tsuki pulls on her hair. "OH, MY-

HAPPY PUPPIES RINBOWS SUNSHINE AND UNICORNS LA LA LA LA LA LA LA HAPPINESS CANDY LOLLIPOPS SO DANDY NO PROBLEMS HERE WE'RE ALL SO HAAAAPPPY AND NOT CURSING LIKE SOME DUDE IN AN R-RATED MOVIE AND BEATING PEOPLE UP VIOLENTLY LA LA LA LA LA LA **LA LA LA!**

The Tallest lies on the floor, nearly beaten to a pulp (again! :D)

Tsuki stands up and brushes herself off. "Now, we have another treat for you. We're going to be reading some special fan mail we received. Happylilbutttershirt says: 'Dear IZSC, you guys stink. You have no talent, and your are not funny.'"

"EVERYTHING WE'VE BEEN TRYING TO SAY FROM DAY ONE!" Zim shouts.

"Aw, Zimmeh, dun be mad! We're all friends here!" Gen says.

"Yeah!" GIR chimes.

Dib and Zim point at each other accusingly. "WE ARE **NOT** FRIENDS!"

"AH SAID WE ALL BE FRIENDS!" GIR screams. "WAAAH! WAAAAAAHHH! WAAAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

"ENOUGH!" Zim screams. "FINE! WE'RE ALL FRIENDS!"

GIR jumps up and down. "Now give each other a huuuuuug!"

"NO! NEVER!" scream the rivals.

Gen folds her arms. "Hey, return of Keef never got animated, so DO IT."

Dib and Zim hug.

GIR and Gen laugh like maniacs.

Tsuki pulls out the next letter. "This is from: 'You people have serious problems.'"

"Wow. These people are smart," Tak says.

"DoomyParanormalEggs says: 'I HATE THIS STORY.' Wait, seriously?"

"Can't say I blame them…"Dib says.

"TwilightIsTheBestestThingEVAR says: 'Your fanfic is horrible and pitiful. Maybe it'd be better if Edward and Jacob hosted instead of those two weird girls. The blond one is an idiot and the black-haired one scares me.'" Tsuki looks up. "I like Edward and Jacob, and I'm glad I scare you, but, please, STOP FLAMING US."

Gen looks at the paper. "WOT? I am NOT an idiot!"

Zim folds his arms. "Prove it."

"A squared plus b squared equals c squared. This is the Pythagorean Theorem, which can be used to find the measurements of the sides of a triangle. is a real word. I tend to be loquacious about my emotions on certain subjects in media, such as video games and manga. Pi is a term that can be used to calculate the circumference of a circle and is usually abbreviated as 3.14." She stops to take a breath. "There. Is that enough proof for you?"

Zim shuts his little green trap.

"Finally, this review is from IWearDarkBlackSuits256789250. '$#&* *(#$! %&*()* *%$&(^)_ %&*_ %$*(&%#&& #&*2)%&#*)!'".

…

Tsuki grins. "IWearDarkBlackSuits256789250 is going to get seriously injured after this is over."

Gen hands Tak the MoD. "Here 'ya go! Your turn!"

Tak walks onstage and begins.

"There's a fire starting in my heart  
>Reaching a fever pitch and it's bring me out the dark<br>Finally I can see you crystal clear  
>Go ahead and sell me out and I'll lay your ship bare<p>

See how I'll leave, with every piece of you  
>Don't underestimate the things that I will do<br>There's a fire starting in my heart  
>Reaching a fever pitch and it's bring me out the dark<p>

The scars of your love remind me of us  
>They keep me thinking that we almost had it all<br>The scars of your love, they leave me breathless  
>I can't help feeling<p>

We could have had it all  
>Rolling in the deep<br>You had my heart inside your hand  
>And you played it to the beat<p>

Baby, I have no story to be told  
>But I've heard one of you and I'm gonna make your head burn<br>Think of me in the depths of your despair  
>Making a home down there as mine sure won't be shared<p>

The scars of your love remind you of us  
>They keep me thinking that we almost had it all<br>The scars of your love, they leave me breathless  
>I can't help feeling<p>

We could have had it all  
>Rolling in the deep<br>You had my heart inside your hand  
>And you played it to the beat<p>

Could have had it all  
>Rolling in the deep<br>You had my heart inside your hand  
>But you played it with a beating<p>

Throw your soul through every open door  
>Count your blessings to find what you look for<br>Turn my sorrow into treasured gold  
>You pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow<p>

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>We could have had it all<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)  
>We could have had it all<p>

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>It all, it all, it all, it all<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>We could have had it all<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)  
>Rolling in the deep<p>

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>You had my heart and soul<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)  
>And you played it to the beat<p>

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>Could have had it all<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)  
>Rolling in the deep<p>

(Now I'm gonna wish you never had met me)  
>You had my heart and soul in your hand<br>(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)  
>But you played it, you played it, you played it to the beat."<p>

APPLAUSE!

"w00t!" Gen cheers. "The songs we do just make meh HAPPEH!"

Tak walks offstage and looks in the corner, where GIR and MiMi are holding each other's hands and giggling. "Ugh. Seeing them do that just makes me sick."

"Oh, come on," Dib says. "It's cute."

"Well, yeah, but…it just had to be with that GIR thing, didn't it?"

Suddenly, the roof magically pops open for everyone to see the stars.

"Wow," Dib breathes.

"It's…beautiful."

"So many planets out there to conquer."

"So many planets out there of ME, ZIM, to destroy…"

Everyone gives Zim a weird look.

"Thank you for ruining the moment."

Dib is looking up, hypnotized by the radiance of the world beyond. So many mysteries, so many things left to discover, but we take this beauty for granted. The world is more complex than meets the eye, but viewing these complicated things with a simple mind can bring so much joy.

"DIB-KUN! YOU WANNA SING NOW?" Gen shouts, as Dib snaps out of his deep moment. Noticing the disappointed look he gives her, she quiets down. "Y'know, the stars could be your… inspiration!"

Dib thinks of something and picks up the MoD. "Got it!

"Splashdown in the silver screen,  
>Into a deep dramatic scene,<br>I swim through the theatre,  
>Or maybe I'm just a dreamer!<br>Like a kite in the bright midday,  
>Wonder stole my breath away,<br>Shy sonata for Mercury,  
>The stars always sing so pretty.<p>

This picnic will soon depart,  
>Real life, I'm sad to see you go,<br>I'll miss you with all my heart,  
>But I'd rather be alone.<br>'Cause I couldn't live without,  
>The sunsets that dazzle in the dusk,<br>So I'll drag the anchor up,  
>And rest assured, 'cause dreams don't turn to dust!<br>Dreams don't turn to dust.

I made for the countryside,  
>And my eyes never grew so wide,<br>Apple, raspberry, river blue,  
>I don't wanna leave without you,<br>In the sound I'll gladly drown,  
>Into the emerald underground,<br>And I rub my eyes 'cause it's hard to see,  
>Surrounded by all this beauty.<p>

This picnic will soon depart,  
>Real life, I'm sad to see you go,<br>I'll miss you with all my heart,  
>But I'd rather be alone.<br>'Cause I couldn't live without,  
>The sunsets that dazzle in the dusk,<br>So I'll drag the anchor up,  
>And rest assured, 'cause dreams don't turn to dust!<p>

When tiger eyes begin making you blush!  
>When diamonds boast that they can't be crushed,<br>Let 'em go 'cause dreams don't turn to dust!

This picnic will soon depart,  
>Real life, I'm sad to see you go,<br>I'll miss you with all my heart,  
>But I'd rather be alone.<br>'Cause I couldn't live without,  
>The sunsets that dazzle in the dusk,<br>So I'll drag the anchor up,  
>And rest assured, 'cause dreams don't turn to dust!<br>Dreams don't turn to dust!  
>Dreams don't turn to dust!<br>Rest assured, 'cause dreams don't turn to dust!"

APPLAUSE!

"That was great!" Gen cheers.

Zim shrugs. "I've seen better."

Dib and Zim break out in another fight.

"Well, THIS isn't surprising or redundant in any way," Red says with an eye roll.

Gen looks out at the stars and gasps. "OMG! AFTER TWENTY CHAPTERS, YOU KNOW WHAT WE'VE NEVER DONE?"

"Made this story interesting?" Purple asks.

Gen hits him with the gummy bear sack. "NO! WE'VE NEVER DONE A JUSTIN BEIBER PARODY! He's probably a good person, and he's not a bad singer, but parodying him is FUN!"

Everyone starts singing very loud and off-key.

"And I was like baby, baby, baby, oh  
>Like baby, baby, baby, oh<br>I thought you'd always be mine, mine

Baby, baby, baby, oh  
>Like baby, baby, baby, no<br>Like baby, baby, baby, oh  
>I thought you'd always be mine, MIIIIIIINNNEEEEEE!"<p>

"What was the point of that?"

"It was amusing. X3"

Tsuki looks around "Y'know, there's a major IZ character that we've never had as a special guest…"

Gen shudders. "Wait, you don't mean… WE ALREADY HAD ONE CREEPY GUEST TONIGHT!"

Dib's eyes widen with curiosity, and, yet, understanding, but Zim just looks confused.

Mrs. Bitters slithers into the room, her cold glare creeping through the veins and souls of the others. She looks around and narrows her gaze. "You all are failures. I waste all my time teaching you and this is what you do with your already horrible and doomed lives. Shame on you all. Shame on you ALL…" She exits.

Johnny randomly runs through the room holding something pointy whilst making a sound in between laughing and screaming like a banshee.

Suddenly the studio grows quiet and the lights dim as Gen and Tsuki mount the stage. "And now, there is one more contestant that has yet to perform their 20th Chapter Extravabananza solo song. We've saved him for last, the titular character of this awesome yet messed up show… Give it up for ZIM!"

The curtains part to show Zim holding the MoD in a victory pose as heavy rock music begins to play.

"The secret side of me, I never let you see  
>I keep it caged but I can't control it<br>So stay away from me, the beast is good for me  
>I feel the rage and I just can't hold it<p>

It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls  
>It comes awake and I can't control it<br>Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head  
>Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it begin?<p>

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I love what I've become, your nightmare's just begun  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<p>

I, I feel like a monster!  
>I, I feel like a monster!<p>

My secret side I keep hid under lens and wig  
>I keep it caged but I can't control it<br>'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down  
>Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it begin?<p>

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I love what I've become, your nightmare's just begun  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<p>

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<br>I, I feel like a monster!  
>I, I feel like a monster!<p>

It's hiding in the dark, its teeth are razor sharp  
>There's no escape for you, it wants my soul, it wants my heart<br>No one can hear you scream, maybe it's just a dream  
>Maybe it's inside of me, you can't stop this monster!<p>

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster<br>I love what I've become, your nightmare's just begun  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<p>

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<br>I've gotta lose control, I'm something radical  
>I must confess that I feel like a monster!<p>

I, I feel like a monster!  
>I, I feel like a monster!<br>I, I feel like a monster!  
>I, I feel like a monster!"<p>

APPLAUSE!

"w00t!" Gen cheers. "You totally changed the words to give it a different meaning that fits your personality but I LAIK EET!"

Dib and the Tallest roll their eyes and stand in the corner.

Zim holds the microphone above his head. "ONCE I DOMINATE THIS SINGING CHALLENGE, I WILL RULE THE UNIVERSE!"

"Oh, yeah! That reminds me!" Tsuki exclaims, knocking Zim off the stage. "It's time for our ALL-STAR AWARDS!"

APPLAUSE!

Gen grabs another mike. "There are two awards: Best Duet, and All-Star Winner! The best duet is our favorite pair of singers. The All-Star is the winner of the competition's overall favorite award. The winners of the awards will sing a song to commemorate their victory and success in IZSC!"

Tsuki takes the first envelope. "Our Best Duet winners are… IT'S A TIE! A tie between GIR and MiMi and Zim and Dib!"

APPLAUSE!

Gen smiles. "GIR and MiMi were chosen for their sweet, fun, romantic style. They can show love in an adorable way! Their only competitive performance so far, where they performed 'Our Song' by Taylor Swift, got them a victory and, we hope, many 'Awws' from our audience!"

"Our second set, **Zim** and _Dib_, hate each other," Tsuki begins. "But that was some of their appeal. Seeing enemies working together can have moving and/or comedic results. They've won both duels they've competed in together, performing Taylor Swift's 'Mean' and My Chemical Romance's 'Planetary'. They're going to perform their victory song first. Take it away, morons!"

"_That's great, it starts with an earthquake  
>Birds and snakes, an aero plane<br>Lenny Bruce is not afraid_

Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn  
>World serves its own needs, don't mis-serve your own needs<br>Feed it up a knock, speed, grunt, no strength  
>No ladder structure, clatter with fear of height, down height<p>

**Wire in a fire, representing seven games in a  
>Government for hire and a combat site left her<br>Wasn't coming in a hurry with the  
>Furies breathing down your neck<strong>

Team by team reporters baffled, trump, tethered, crop  
>Look at that low plane, fine, then<br>Uh, oh, overflow, population, common group  
>But it'll do, save yourself, serve yourself<p>

**World serves its own needs listen to your heart bleed**  
><em>Tell me with the rapture and the revered and the right<em>  
><em>Right you vitriolic, patriotic, slam, fight, bright light<br>_**Feeling pretty psyched  
><strong>  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>It's the end of the world as we know it  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>And I feel fine  
><em><br>Six o'clock, TV hour, don't get caught in foreign towers  
>Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself churn<br>Lock him in uniform and book burning, bloodletting  
>Every motive escalate, automotive incinerate<em>

**Light a candle, light a motive, step down, step down  
>Watch your heel crush, crush, uh, oh, this means<br>No fear, cavalier, renegade, steer clear  
>A tournament, a tournament, a tournament of lies<br>Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives and I decline**

It's the end of the world as we know it  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>(It's time I had some time alone)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>(It's time I had some time alone)  
>And I feel fine, I feel fine<p>

It's the end of the world as we know it  
>(It's time I had some time alone)<br>It's the end of the world as we know it  
>(It's time I had some time alone)<br>It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine  
>(It's time I had some time alone)<p>

**The other night I tripped a nice continental drift divide**  
><strong>Mountains sit in a line<strong>, LEONARD BERSTEIN!  
><em>Leonid Brezhnev, Lenny Bruce and Lester Bangs<br>Birthday party, cheesecake, jelly bean_**, boom!**  
><em>You symbiotic, patriotic, slam, but neck, right?<em> **Right.**

It's the end of the world as we know it  
><strong>(It's time I had some time alone<strong>)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>_(It's time I had some time alone_)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>**(It's time I had some time alone)  
><strong>And I feel fine

It's the end of the world as we know it  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>It's the end of the world as we know it  
>(<em>It's time I had some time alone<em>)  
>And I feel fine<p>

It's the end of the world as we know it  
><strong>(It's time I had some time alone<strong>)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>_(It's time I had some time alone_)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>**(It's time I had some time alone)**  
><strong>And I feel fine<strong>

It's the end of the world as we know it  
><em>(It's time I had some time alone)<br>_It's the end of the world as we know it  
><strong>(It's time I had some time alone<strong>)  
>It's the end of the world as we know it<br>_(It's time I had some time alone)_  
>And I feel fine, fine<p>

**It's time I had some time alone!"**

APPLAUSE!

"LEONARD BERNSTEIN!"

"Do you even know who he is?"

"Uh… he wrote plays, I've heard."

Zim and Dib step off the stage. An awkward silence ensues as everyone waits for GIR and MiMi.

"WHERE ARE THEY?" Red screams.

"Uh, GIR texted me," Tsuki says, checking her phone. "I think it says…MiMi and I went to go eat at the Krazy Taco before we get singin'. Bye!"

"Okay, so we're gonna have to stall," Gen announces. "WHO WANTS TO DO IT?"

Zim raises his hand.

"WE'RE NOT DESTROYING THE PLANET."

Zim lowers his hand.

Dib raises his hand.

"WE'RE NOT GIVING ZIM AN AUTOPSY."

Dib lowers his hand.

"I think the Tallest should do something!" Gen says.

"Finally! Back in control!" Purple exclaims.

"Prepare for the best thing that's ever come to this lame story!" Red says.

The next half hour is spent watching Red and Purple eat and complain and laugh about the weird transmissions they got from Zim. Everyone eventually falls asleep until a loud shout rouses them.

"HAI, PEOPLES! WE BE BAA-AAACK!"

GIR and MiMi enter cheerfully.

Tsuki punches the Tallest in their faces. "Red and Purple… YOU FAIL AT LIFE."

"No, we-"

Tsuki knocks them unconscious.

PWNED.

**GIR** and _MiMi_ take mikes, leap onstage, and begin.

"_Elevator buttons and morning air  
>Strangers' silence makes me wanna take<br>the stairs  
>If you were here we'd laugh about their<br>vacant stares  
>But right now, my time is theirs<em>

**Seems like there's always someone who  
>disapproves<br>They'll judge it like they know about me  
>and you<br>And the verdict comes from those with  
>nothing else to do<br>The jury's out, but my choice is you  
><strong>  
>So don't you worry your pretty little mind<br>People throw rocks at things that shine  
>And life makes love look hard<br>The stakes are high  
>The water's rough<br>But this love is ours

**You never know what people have up  
>their sleeves<br>**_Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at  
>me<br>_**Lurking in the shadows with their lip gloss  
>smiles<strong>  
><em>But I don't care, cause right now you're<br>mine_

And you'll say don't you worry your pretty  
>little mind<br>People throw rocks at things that shine  
>And life makes love look hard<br>The stakes are high  
>The water's rough<br>But this love is ours  
><strong><br>And it's not theirs to speculate  
>If it's wrong and your hands are tough<br>but they are where mine belong and**  
><em>I'll fight their doubt and give you faith<br>with this song for you_

_Cause I love the gap between your teeth_  
><strong>And I love the riddles that you speak<br>And any snide remarks from my father  
>about your tattoos will be ignored<strong>  
><em>Cause my heart is yours<em>

So don't you worry your pretty little mind  
>People throw rocks at things that shine<br>And life makes love look hard

So don't you worry your pretty little mind  
>People throw rocks at things that shine<br>But they can't take what's ours  
>They can't take what's ours<br>The stakes are high  
>The waters rough<br>But this love is ours!"

APPLAUSE!

GIR and MiMi kiss (somehow, since MiMi has no mouth).

Gen proceeds to squeal and run around in circles.

Tsuki punches her in the gut to make her stop and drags her up to the stage. "ENOUGH! Now, it's time for our biggest award of the night- the ALL-STAR AWARD!"

"This award goes to our favorite contestant throughout the entire story! The winner of this award has done amazing during the challenge. They are beloved by many IZ fans around the world…thing. They've won every single duel they've competed in, and have PLENTY 'o' da fangirls!"

"The IZSC All-Star is…"

"I AM ZIM!"

"ZIM, SHUT UP!"

Zim shuts up.

"The real IZSC All-Star is…"

"GIR!"

MEGA APPLAUSE OF DOOM!

GIR steps on stage and receives the award. "Thank youz, peoples of da world! I like you! You be so niiiice to meh! You awesome, like tacos! Thank youz so much! I lubs you so much I wanna eats you! XD"

Tsuki hands GIR the MoD. "C'mon, GIR! Sing your All-Star song!"

GIR takes the MoD as a beat begins to play.

"I-I-I-I-I-I  
>I came to dance, dance, dance, dance<br>I hit the floor 'cause that's my plans, plans, plans, plans  
>I'm wearing all my favorite brands, brands, brands, brands<br>Give me some space for both my hands, hands, hands, hands

Yeah, yeah  
>'Cause it's goes on and on and on<br>And it goes on and on and on  
>I throw my hands up in the air sometimes<br>Saying ayyyyyy-o  
>Gotta let go<p>

I wanna celebrate and live my life  
>Saying ayyyyyyy-o<br>Baby, let's go

'Cause we gon' rock this club  
>We gon' go all night<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite<p>

'Cause I told you once  
>Now I told you twice<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite<p>

I came to move, move, move, move  
>Get out the way of me and my crew, crew, crew, crew<br>I'm in the club so I'm gonna do, do, do, do  
>Just what the [unverified] I came here to do<br>Yeah, yeah

'Cause it's goes on and on and on  
>And It goes on and on and on<p>

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes  
>Saying ayyyyyy-o<br>Gotta let go

I wanna celebrate and live my life  
>Saying ayyyyyy-o<br>Baby, let's go

'Cause we gon' rock this club  
>We gon' go all night<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite<p>

'Cause I told you once  
>Now I told you twice<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite<p>

I'm gonna take it all like  
>I'm gonna be the last one standing<br>I drove around like  
>I'm gonna be the last one landing<p>

'Cause I-I-I believe it  
>And I-I-I, I just want it all<br>I just want it all  
>I'm gonna put my hands in the air<br>Ha-hands in the air  
>Put your hands in the air-air-air-air-air-air-air-air<p>

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes  
>Saying ayyyyyy-o<br>Gotta let go  
>I wanna celebrate and live my life<br>Saying ayyyyyy-o  
>Baby, let's go<p>

'Cause we gon' rock this club  
>We gon' go all night<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite<p>

'Cause I told you once  
>Now I told you twice<br>We gon' light it up  
>Like it's dynamite!"<p>

MEGA APPLAUSE OF DOOOOOM!

*BOOM*

Everyone stops cheering and turns their heads to see what Zim and GIR blew up THIS TIME.

A large pile of pudding is lying, exploded, all over the floor.

"Really? Pudding?"

GIR jumps into the mess and begins eating it. "I LAIK PUDDING!"

"Who doesn't like pudding?" Tsuki cheers.

The Tallest stand to the side and grumble. "I can't believe that we didn't win…" Purple grunts.

"Yeah," agrees Red. "These people have no taste. This is treason."

"NEWS FLASH, brainiacs, WE DON'T OBEY YOU." Gen says as she hits Zim over the head with a sack of gummy bears for no apparent reason.

"OW! HOW DARE YOU BEAT THE HEAD OF ZIM!"

Gen cracks up. "Man, you talk like we don't know your name!"

Zim grouchily eats the pudding.

After the pudding is gone, Tsuki and Gen pass out microphones to everyone. "Before we perform our grand finale," Tsuki announces, "We're going to sing a sort of tribute. I'm not sure bak602 would be as enthusiastic about this story without all of the reviews we've gotten. As of this publication, we have 117 reviews. Thank you all for that. This next song is a tribute to how far we've come."

"I still remember this moment  
>In the back of my mind<br>The time we stood with our shaking hands  
>The crowds in stands went wild<p>

We were the kings and the queens  
>And they read off our names<br>The night you danced like you knew our lives  
>Would never be the same<p>

You held your head like a hero  
>On a history book page<br>It was the end of a decade  
>But the start of an age<p>

Long live the walls we crashed through  
>While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you<br>I was screaming, long live all the magic we made  
>And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered<p>

I said, remember this feeling  
>I passed the pictures around<br>Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines  
>Wishing for right now<p>

We are the kings and the queens  
>You traded your baseball cap for a crown<br>When they gave us our trophies  
>And we held them up for our town<p>

And the cynics were outraged  
>Screaming, this is absurd<br>'Cause for a moment a band of thieves  
>In ripped-up jeans got to rule the world<p>

Long live the walls we crashed through  
>While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you<br>I was screaming, long live all the magic we made  
>And bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid<p>

Long live all the mountains we moved  
>I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you<br>I was screaming, long live the look on your face  
>And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered<p>

Hold on to spinning around  
>Confetti falls to the ground<br>May these memories break or fall

And you take a moment  
>Promise me this<br>That you'll stand by me forever  
>But if God forbid fate should step in<p>

And force us into a goodbye  
>If you have children someday<br>When they point to the pictures  
>Please tell them my name<p>

Tell them how the crowds went wild  
>Tell them how I hope they shine<p>

Long live the walls we crashed through  
>I had the time of my life with you<p>

Long, long live the walls we crashed through  
>All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you<br>And I was screaming, long live all the magic we made  
>And bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid<p>

Singing, long live all the mountains we moved  
>I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you<br>And long, long live the look on your face  
>And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered."<p>

APPLAUSE!

Everyone stays onstage, for once. "And now," Gen says, "to conclude our Twentieth Chapter Extravabananza… we won't be playing games."

"But we will be…" Tsuki says dramatically. "PLAYING GOD! Our final song of the night will be a **guys**V.S. _girls _performance, with a solo by Dib!"

"_I can't make my own decisions  
>Or make any with precision<br>Well, maybe you should tie me up  
>So I don't go where you don't want me<em>

**You say that I been changing  
>That I'm not just simply aging<br>Yeah, how could that be logical?  
>Just keep on cramming ideas down my throat<strong>

Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><strong>You don't have to believe me<br>But the way I, way I see it  
><strong>_Next time you point a finger  
>I might have to bend it back<br>Or break it, break it off_

Next time you point a finger  
>I'll point it to the mirror<p>

**If God's the game that you're playing  
>Well, we must get more acquainted<br>Because it has to be so lonely  
>To be the only one who's holy<br>**  
><em>It's just my humble opinion<br>But it's one that I believe in  
>You don't deserve a point of view<br>If the only thing you see is you_

Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>You don't have to believe me<br>But the way I, way I see it  
><em>**Next time you point a finger  
>I might have to bend it back<br>Or break it, break it off  
><strong>  
>Next time you point a finger<br>I'll point it to the mirror

[During the musical break, GIR, MiMi, and Gen play air instruments like crazy.]

_This is the last second chance  
><em>**I'll point you to the mirror**  
><em>I'm half as good as it gets<em>  
><strong>I'll point you to the mirror<strong>

_I'm on both sides of the fence_  
><strong>I'll point you to the mirror<strong>  
><em>Without a hint of regret<br>_I'll hold you to it

I know you don't believe me  
>But the way I, way I see it<br>Next time you point a finger  
>I might have to bend it back<br>Or break it, break it off!

Next time you point a finger  
>I'll point you to the mirror<p>

I know you won't believe me  
>But the way I, way I see it<br>Next time you point a finger  
>I might have to bend it back<br>Or break it, break it off

Next time you point a finger  
>I'll point you to the mirror!"<p>

MEGA APPLAUSE OF DOOM!

Everybody hops on Segways and waves.

"Thank you, one and all, for watching the Invader Zim Singing Challenge 20th Chapter Extravabananza!" Gen chirps.

"WATCHING A FANFIC STILL MAKES NO SENSE!" Dib shouts. Zim punches him in the gut and laughs.

"We'll see you next time on IZSC!" Tsuki shouts.

GIR comes up extremely close to the camera. "BAI, PEEPOLES! CHOCOLATE MILK!"

* * *

><p><strong>w00t! The total word count, counting song lyrics is... 10,931! LONGEST CHAPTER EVERRRRR!<strong>

**Anyway, I have a question. What do you people think the outcome of a fight between Tsuki and Nny would be? Please tell me your opinion in addition to your comments on the Extravabananza. Now more than ever... REVIEW! :D**

**Thank you all so much for your support! And remember... DRINK DA CHOCOLATE MILK...**


	21. Gaz vs Zim

**FINALLY! I'M BACK! As for those of you who don't already know, IZSC was on hiatus while I worked on some other projects, and, of course, still need to finish them. But that's me for you! Starting too many fanfics.**

Idiot.

**NO ONE ASKED YOU, EDWARD! Anyway, here it is. I wrote the songs for this chapter, so feel free to tell me how I did!**

* * *

><p>Gen and Tsuki walk into the studio.<p>

"That was a fun hiatus!" Gen says.

"Yeah." Tsuki looks around the room. "Where is everybody?"

"Dangit! They probably thought we wouldn't be resuming the fic."

Tsuki shrugs. "Oh, well. It'll just be more painful when they do arrive."

GIR flies into the room and immediately hugs Tsuki's legs. "HAI, PUNCHY LADY! HAI, CRACKERS! I MISSEDED YOU!"

Tsuki returns the hug. "I LOVE THIS LITTLE GUY!"

Gen looks around. "Y'know, our special guest is waiting outside. She could probably help us get the others in here."

"Then go get her."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"SHE'LL KILL ME."

"…Fine. You stay here with GIR."

Gen and GIR look around uncomfortably, unsure of what to do. Finally, Gen speaks up. "Um…welcome back to the Invader Zim Singing Challenge! As you know, IZSC has been on hiatus for a while, but we're back now! There won't be any more copyrighted songs used in the competition anymore, so Blake will try to write some. And, uh…GIR, take it away."

"Well, we gonna have lots o' fun even though it's been a loooong time, BUT I STILL LAIK YOU PEOPLEZ! We gonna eat tacos n' waffles until we SPLODE! I like bein' here even though Mastah's always sayin' that this place is stupid and dumb cuz everyone says he likes Ms. Tak. Dat makes him all angry even though he really does! But we gonna have a great time! I LIKE CHEESE!"

The IZ cast runs screaming through the room, followed by Tsuki and an Irken with deep blue eyes wearing dark clothes. The chasers are holding baseball bats and laughing.

The cast runs into their seats while Tsuki and the other Irken wipe tears of laughter from their eyes. "That- was- AWESOME!" Tsuki pants.

"If only every chapter of this stupid thing was like that," says the other.

Gen looks up crossly. "How come you have to insult us EVERY TIME, Blez?"

Blez folds her arms. Don't act like you don't deserve it."

"I blame Dib," Tsuki says.

"DON'T TALK ABOUT HIM THAT WAY!" Blez promptly tackles Tsuki and they begin to roll around fist-fighting on the floor. In case you have not noticed or do not already know, Dib is Blez's beloved- OKAY BLEZ I GET IT YOU HATE IT WHEN I SAY THAT JUST PUT DOWN THE MISSLE!- she has a crush on him.

The Tallest try to escape, as is custom, but are bombarded with Gen's gummy bear sack.

GIR runs around screaming, Zim tries to catch him, and Tak tries to shoot him with a laser. Gaz sits quietly playing her Game Slave. Gen, upon seeing Tak chasing Zim, begins to scream about ZATR whilst GIR hugs MiMi. The ARMPIT platoon from Sgt. Frog races through the room for no apparent reason. At this point everyone is screaming their heads off, with the exception of the Tallest, who are moaning in pain.

"SHUT UP!"

Everyone stops fighting at the sound of the feminine voice that seems to come from nowhere and calm down.

Gen strokes her gummy bear sack. "I missed you, old friend."

Tsuki clears her throat. "Alright, tonight's duel is… GAZ VS ZIM! Gaz, you're up first."

Gaz grabs the MoD indifferently and begins.

"_Listen to me, loud and clear.  
>I'm tired of you screaming in my ear<br>All your stupid theories and plans  
>You say the world will be in the palm of his hand<em>

_But you're crazy  
>Going on and on about idiotic things<br>You're crazy  
>You think he has power because he's green<br>For someone who claims to see everything  
>It's odd how little you know about anything.<em>

_I just want to be alone  
>Not with you and your never-ending drones<br>Go away and let me be  
>Or you'll never again know the meaning of peace.<em>

_You're crazy  
>Going on and on about idiotic things<br>You're crazy  
>You think he has power because he's green<br>For someone who claims to see everything  
>It's odd how little you know about anything.<em>

_Just go, just go, just go.  
>It's best if you leave me alone.<br>Just go, just go, just go.  
>Can't you tell that I WANT TO BE ALONE?<em>

_You're crazy  
>Going on and on about idiotic things<br>You're crazy  
>You think he has power because he's green<br>For someone who claims to see everything  
>It's odd how little you know about anything.<em>

_You know nothing about anything."_

APPLAUSE!

Dib backs away from Gaz in fear, inadvertently falling into Blez's glomp.

Zim laughs his head off before Blez lets go of Dib and begins chasing him with missiles.

"Where does everyone get these weapons?" Red asks.

Tsuki rubs her head. "I don't know. They can't be getting them from my stash. I've tightened up security."

Red and Purple back away in fear and accidently step into Blez's warpath. They begin to run away along with Zim.

GIR looks around. Heeeyyy… Where all the waffles?"

Gen looks around in a panic. "OH, NO! WE RAN OUT OF WAFFLES THAT WE GOT IN CHAPTER NINE! I THINK IT WAS CHAPTER NINE BUT WHO CARES? WE'RE OUT OF WAFFLES! NOOOO!" She runs over and hits a button that triggers an alarm.

***CODE RED* *CODE RED* *CODE RED* *CODE RED* *CODE RED* *CODE RED* *CODE RED***

GIR and Gen blast through the ceiling.

Tsuki deactivates the alarm. "Well, that was…odd."

Zim and the Tallest collapse on the ground. Blez aims her missile at them.

"No, Blez," Tsuki says. "Don't. We need Zim to finish the chapter. Plus, if we destroy them now, we can't torture them later. It's best to torture in painful bursts that don't reach the full extent of your abilities. That way you can torture them later on. Simple logic."

Blez drops the missile. "Good point." She kicks them and beats them painfully for a minute, then walks away eating a muffin.

Zim manages to stand. "I- hate- this- place-"

"Good news," says Dib. "You're next."

Zim and Dib begin a screaming match. Several minutes later, Gen and GIR run back in the room carrying boxes of waffle mix.

"WE GOTS WAFFLEZ!" GIR shouts.

"Enough for a whole year," Gen adds proudly.

"What kind of store has a year's supply of waffles?"

"DA AWESOME STORE!" GIR shouts.

Tsuki smiles for a second (EVEN SHE CANNOT RESIST THE GIR) and walks over to Zim and Dib, who are currently making the word's most pathetic yo mama jokes. She kicks Dib in the face. Blez looks on, infuriated for a moment. Tsuki then grabs Zim and drags him to the stage. "Well, your turn."

Zim looks around in confusion. "Eh?"

"What do you mean, 'eh'?"

"What is the MIGHTY ZIM supposed to do?"

"Sing the song you wrote."

"What song?"

"Didn't you write one?"

"No."

"WE WERE ON HIATUS FOR OVER A #$%&* MONTH AND YOU DIDN'T WRITE ANYTHING?"

Zim glares at Tsuki in defiance. "You DARE question the mighty Zim? Of course I didn't write a stupid song."

Tsuki glances at Gen. "So? Now what do we do?"

Dib looks up hopefully. "Dissect him?"

Tak shrugs. "Torture?"

The Tallest join in. "Blow him up?"

"Push him off a cliff?"

"Capital punishment?"

"Stabbing?"

"SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION?"

Gen hits Purple on the head. "We're not making him spontaneously combust. Besides, Zim is the one who usually _causes_ spontaneous combustion."

"What on Irk is spontaneous combustion?" asks Red.

"Things catching on fire for no apparent reason."

…

Tsuki clears her throat. "So, what should we REALLY do?"

Gen shrugs. "He'll have to improvise. Improv is awesome! Now, Zim, just sing whatever you can think of."

Zim snatches the MoD and begins to sing, very off-key.

"_I AM ZIM! _

_I am amazing, the best Invader ever!  
>There is no end to my skill!<em>

_THE HUMANS WILL BOW AND TREMBLE AT MY KNEES!  
>I WILL RULE THEM ALL AND THEY WILL BE MY SLAVES!<br>THE EARTH IS DOOMED!_

_OBEY- THE- FIST!_

_Dib is an annoying filth-beast  
>And his head is the size of the Massive.<br>I am going to destroy him  
>And he will be in much pain<br>Many, many times!_

_I will rule the Earth  
>Because I am the best Invader who ever lived!<br>The humans will all beg for mercy  
>AND WILL GET NONE!<em>

_The Tallest will praise me  
>Dib will be gone<br>(Tak will love me)  
>GIR will be my second in command.<em>

_I WILL CONQUER AND DESTROY EVERYTHING IN SIGHT  
>FOR I AM THE MOST AMAZING INVADER OF THEM ALL<br>THE ONLY ONE TO SURVIVE IMPENDING DOOM ONE  
>EARTH WILL BE MINE!<em>

_MUA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!_

_I AM ZIM!"_

…

…

…

GIR is the only one clapping.

Dib is ranting about how Zim will never rule earth, and how he's going to stop him, and how his head isn't big and blah, blah, blah… Anyway, Blez glomps/tackles him and he shuts up.

Tak slams Zim into the wall. "WHAT WAS THAT PART YOU WHISPERED?"

"YOU'RE LYING!"

Tak facepalms.

Gen and Tsuki glance at each other. "Well, that was… interesting…" Gen begins.

"Zim, you have absolutely no potential as a songwriter and you fail at this singing challenge as well as life," Tsuki says. At Gen's dirty look, she shakes her head. "What? I'm just stating the obvious."

Gen grinds her teeth. "I think it's time to vote."

"But I'm always the one who announces the voting- fine. EVERYONE, SHUT UP, TAKE A BALLOT AND VOTE!"

ONE VOTE LATER, DOT DOT DOT…

Blez grabs the envelope and walks onto the stage. "Thank you. Tonight, you heard Gaz singing 'You're Crazy' and Zim 'singing' 'I am Zim.' The winner is…Gaz."

She nonchalantly tosses the card over her shoulder and leaves.

Gaz nonchalantly shrugs.

…

"You people have ZERO imagination," Gen says bitterly. "GIR! Close us out tonight!"

GIR proceeds to beat box for four straight hours.

Uh… see you next time…


	22. Tak vs GIR WITH KITTIES!

**Okay, so another long update. But not nearly as bad as last time! STUPID SHORT ATTENTION SPAN!**

**This chapter is dedicated to Cylonblaze. You gave me this extremely odd idea, so THANK YOU!**

**Please enjoy, review, and don't eat the yellolw snow.**

* * *

><p>GIR is drinking a 346-ounce Suck Munky.<p>

"CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!"

GIR finishes it and everyone cheers.

Tsuki checks a stopwatch. "Nineteen point one seconds! NEW RECORD!"

"Great job, GIR!" Gen squeals, but she's soon distracted by a skinny black cat that runs into the room.

The Tallest look at the feline, confused. "What is that thing?"

"It's called a cat," Tsuki explains. "Humans like to keep them as pets."

Purple shivers. "Why would anyone want to keep those things?"

Gen kneels down to look at the cat. "What do you mean? I think it's cute. Look, it has white patches around its eyes!"

"Is it normal to be able to see their eye color?" Tak remarks. The cat's eyes are an amber color.

"Yeah," Tsuki says.

A green cat runs into the room.

"Great," Gaz mumbles. "Another one."

"KITTEH!" GIR screams, and grabs the cat and hugs it.

The cat yowls and hisses.

"Cats aren't green," mutters Gaz.

"Since when did anything here have to make sense?" Gen snaps. "These cats are adorable!"

The green cat pulls itself out of GIR's grasp and leaps at the black cat. They wrestle and chase one another around the room.

"They looks angry…" GIR whispers.

Tsuki looks around. "Wait a second, where are…"

The black cat looks up expectantly.

"No, it can't be-" Gen's eyes grow wide. "D-Dib?"

The cat meows.

Tsuki bursts out laughing.

"Black cat, white patches, amber eyes…Dib." Gen says nervously. She examines the other cat. "Green fur, big reddish-pink eyes…"

Tsuki's laughter becomes uncontrollable. "THEY'RE CATS! BEST FORM OF TORTURE EVER!"

Dib's ears droop. Zim begins screaming, or rather, howling.

The Tallest are extremely disturbed and faint.

GIR scoops up Zim again and hugs him. "Aw, mastah, you so CUTE!"

Zim tries to scratch GIR, but the SIR unit is unfazed.

Dib sits in the corner in shame.

"It's official. Tsuki is gonna die of laughter," Gen growls. "Well, it looks like we'll have to change up our duel today. So, I guess the matchup is TAK VS GIR!" She turns to Membrane, who hasn't noticed the cats at ALL (STUPID MEMBRANE) and is hitting a computer with an English muffin. "HEY, SCIENCE-FREAK!"

"And what can I do for the peculiar child today?"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT."

Membrane chuckles. "Poor insane child…"

"SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME!" Gen screams. "INVENT SOMETHING THAT CAN TURN CATS INTO HUMANS!"

Membrane mutters something too science-y for our poor, mortal minds to understand and walks away.

Tsuki is currently rolling around on the floor, still cracking up.

Gen suddenly falls on the ground and convulses. "NO! NO! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!"

Gaz raises an eyebrow. "What-"

"TSUKI'S LAUGHING LIKE A MANIAC AND CAN'T EFFECTIVLEY DO HER JOB, WHICH MEANS **I** HAVE TO BE THE SERIOUS ONE! I CAN'T DO THAT! The world…so…cold…"

Dib meows.

Gen sits up. "Fine, fine, I get it. I'm being overly dramatic. Don't get your tail in a wad."

Dib facepaws.

Tak stands up and grabs the MoD. "Can I get this over with so no one ELSE has a meltdown?"

Gen nods. "Sure. START THE MUSIC, EDWARD!"

"I DON'T WORK FOR YOU!"

"DO YOU WANT ME TO CALL-"

"FINE! FINE!"

Tak begins.

"_All those years, waiting in silence  
>For you to come out of the shadows<br>And, honestly, it's surprising  
>That you could be<br>So stupid and cold._

_They'll say that I have problems  
>But they don't know how it feels<br>A life ruined so suddenly  
>But now I'm taking back the wheel.<em>

_You won't know the meaning of peace  
>When I'm done with you<br>All those walls you sealed away  
>I'm breaking through<br>So go around here acting like you're  
>The best thing the world has ever seen<br>But when I'm through you won't  
>Be bragging about anything.<em>

_Tired of waiting for the perfect opportunity  
>You know by now I'm coming after you<br>Just try and hide but in my pain and spite  
>I'm gonna tear you in two.<em>

_They'll say that I have problems  
>But they don't know how it feels<br>A life ruined so suddenly  
>But now I'm taking back the wheel.<em>

_You won't know the meaning of peace  
>When I'm done with you<br>All those walls you sealed away  
>I'm breaking through<br>So go around here acting like you're  
>The best thing the world has ever seen<br>But when I'm through you won't  
>Be bragging about anything.<em>

_You won't know any comfort  
>When I'm finished with you<br>All those walls you sealed away from me  
>I'm breaking through<br>So go around here acting like you're  
>The best thing the world has ever seen<br>But when I'm through you won't  
>Be bragging about anything.<em>

_Don't even try to escape  
>You've earned yourself this fate.<br>You can't run away  
>It has to end this way!<em>

_You won't know the meaning of peace  
>When I'm done with you<br>All those walls you sealed away  
>I'm breaking through<br>So go around here acting like you're  
>The best thing the world has ever seen<br>But when I'm through you won't  
>Be bragging about anything.<em>

_You won't know any comfort  
>When I'm finished with you<br>All those walls you sealed away from me  
>I'm breaking through<br>So go around here acting like you're  
>The best thing the world has ever seen<br>But when I'm through you won't  
>Be bragging about anything.<em>"

APPLAUSE

Tsuki has stopped her fit of maniacal laughter and is simply showing her evil smile. "I think that song will be a good influence on everyone…Heh."

Everyone takes a step away from her.

GIR is squeezing the life out of Zim again.

Dib…um…purrs violently with laughter?

Noticing that they have not moved a muscle in a very long time, Gen walks over to the Tallest and pokes each of them. They fall to the ground like a pair of dominoes. "Uh, Tsuki?"

"Yeah?"

"What do we do with the Tallest if they aren't moving?"

"Are they dead?"

"Sadly, no."

"Dang it. Just get the ESoP."

Gen retrieves the ESoP. Suddenly, the swordfish gets a mind of its own and hits everyone with itself.

The violent electric shocks that follow are quite amusing. Particularly the Tallest's girlish screams as the fish hits them in ways they never thought possible.

"Whiners."

When all this has come to an awkward close by forcing Purple to swallow the fish, Zim and Dib both have fluffed up, static-filled pelts.

And so resumes Tsuki's laughing fit.

GIR smiles. "Aw, Mastah n' Bighead! YOU ALL FLUFFEH!"

Zim hisses.

"Okay!" GIR blasts through the roof.

…

"…Did you tell him to do that?"

Zim mutters kitty-curses.

"I'll take that as a no."

Dib goes over to do that violent-purr-laughter thing at Zim when both of them see a ball of yarn that's in the corner for some reason.

3…2…1…

It's like a kid eating five cupcakes, ten Pixie Sticks, ten Irken candy-flavor-lick-stick-thingies, and three cans of soda in under a minute. Or the explosion of a small nuclear missile. Zim and Dib exemplify the PURE ESSENSE OF INSANITY with that yarn.

Red twitches. Gen joins Tsuki in the laughing fit. Tak facepalms. Gaz sits nonchalantly playing her game. MiMi drags GIR over to see the sight as he crashes back in through the wall. Purple twitches, mostly because of the Electric Swordfish of Pain that continues to shock him from inside his squeedily-spooch.

FIVE HOURS OF YARN INSANITY LATER…

The cats are still going at it.

Tsuki holds up a can of tuna.

SQUIRREL!

The kitties run over.

"Wow. This is just SAD," Tsuki remarks, throwing the open can on the floor. "I guess tuna isn't worth nothing anymore."

Gen looks around. "Um, GIR, do you wanna sing now?"

"YES!" The robot runs over and picks up Zim, who yowls in desperation. The highly scientific translation from Cat to English would be something like:

"PUT ME DOWN! DIB'S GETTING ALL THE BLEEPIN' TUNA!"

Or something like that.

"Oh, Edwarrrrd…"

"FINE. I'LL PLAY THE STINKIN' MUSIC."

"Okay, GIR! You're on!"

GIR puts Zim down and grabs the MoD.

"_In a world of pessimistic views  
>Why can't we have one optimist?<br>Someone who sees the beauty of life  
>I'm supposed to obey<br>Supposed to be dull and grey  
>But who wants to live that way?<em>

_I see a kaleidoscope of wonders  
>In anything at all<br>I love anything I meet  
>Anything big or small<em>

_I will be the only optimist  
>I was born this way<br>Piggies, monkeys and food  
>Are all my favorite things<br>Instead of being disappointed all the time  
>I'll sing about anything that comes to mind!<em>

_PINEAPPLEZ!_

_I don't care when you say  
>I'm getting in your way<br>I just love to play with you  
>I love the way you scream at me<br>Then I'll hang around and watch TV!  
>I just love being with you<em>

_You yell at me and I sing  
>About something completely random<br>Mastah, I'm happy when you're yellin'  
>'Bout the filthy humaaanns!<em>

_I will be the only optimist  
>I was born this way<br>Piggies, monkeys and food  
>Are all my favorite things<br>Instead of being disappointed all the time  
>I'll sing about anything that comes to mind!<em>

_TOENAILS!_

_In my head I see things  
>Nobody else can<br>And then I just start dancing  
>When I open my eyes<br>I start running and- SURPRISE!  
>With enchiladas I'm prancing<em>

_I'm always in a magic world  
>Where everything is wonderful<br>I sing special songs  
>THAT BE COMPLETLEY UNRELATED TO WHAT'S GOIN' ON!<em>

_Dudi dudi dudi dudi dooooo…._

_I will be the only optimist  
>I was born this way<br>Piggies, monkeys and food  
>Are all my favorite things<br>Instead of being disappointed all the time  
>I'll sing about anything that comes to mind!<em>

_DOOOOOOOM!"_

APPLAUSE!

Tsuki huggles GIR. "Aw, that was sweet. You even used big words! I love you…"

GIR giggles. "You get me a Suck Munkey?"

Gen jumps out of her chair. "I WAS THE SUCK MUNKEY ALL ALONG!"

…

"Hey; it's an EPIC canceled Dib line. I just wanted to say it…"

Dib and Zim are fighting over the yarn again.

Gaz rolls her eyes. "Can we _please _turn the idiots back already?"

"I dunno." Tsuki walks over to the door. "MEMBRANE!"

"Yes, child with violence problems?"

"ARE YOU DONE YET?"

"Almost! After all, I am the greatest scientist who ever lived!"

"Stop blabbing on about your 'accomplishments' and hurry up!"

Tsuki sighs. "Ugh…Egotists make me want to kill them...Let's just vote already."

VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE VOTE…

Tsuki takes the stage with the envelope. "Tonight's special guest is…Mr. Elliot."

Mr. Elliot picks up the MoD and the envelope. "Hello, everybody! I'm so happy to be here tonight! You all are wonderful singers and great kids, so-"

"HURRY UP AND ANNOUNCE THE WINNER BEFORE GAZ AND I FEED YOU TO THE WOLVERINES! AND JACOB!"

Mr. Elliot gulps and laughs nervously. "Oh, girls, you're great at telling jokes. Now, tonight, we've heard Tak singing 'You Won't be Bragging' and GIR singing 'The Only Optimist'. Your winner is…GIR!"

Confetti falls as GIR jumps onstage and dances.

Membrane storms into the room carrying a large bazooka-like item. "SUCCESS! The Cat-to-Human-ifier is done!"

"The author really couldn't come up with a better name than that?" Tak asks.

Tsuki takes the machine and aims it at Zim and Dib. She fires.

The studio promptly explodes.

Everyone pokes their heads out of the rubble. Tsuki looks around or Mr. Elliot. "DID ELLIOT DIE?"

"No, he's passed out over there."

"DANG IT."

GIR points at Zim, who is Irken again. "MASTAH! You don't be fluffy no more!"

Zim looks like he's about to throw up. "D-did I eat…_t-tuna?_"

"Yep!"

Zim turns around and vomits.

Gen smiles. "Well, that's certainly back to normal. Now that this whole adventure is over, let's see if we can get the studio rebuilt by next chapter!"

THE EN-

"HEY! NOBODY EVEN NOTICED THAT I'M NOT A CAT ANYMORE, EITHER?" Dib screams.

NO. NO THEY DID NOT.

* * *

><p><strong>Poor Dibequedor. Anyway, hope you liked the ZIm and Dib kitties! And, I forgot to mention last chapter that Blez belongs to <span>TheAwesomenessThatIsMe1222. <span>Sorry for any confusion. :)**


	23. DON'T DRINK THE ENERGY DRINK

**YAY FOR UPDATING! I wanted to have this up for my birthday, but I pretty much failed atthat considering it was two weeks ago. OH, WELL! Please enjoy, and tonight's special guest belongs to XxDarkxBloodxX. ON WITH THE MADNESS!**

**And, yes, I changed my username. ^^**

* * *

><p>It is 1:15 AM in Gen's bedroom. The entire cast is crowded around the room in pajamas.<p>

Tsuki growls. "Welcome back to IZSC. Our studio still isn't fixed, so we chose to broadcast from Gen's room."

"Don't get mad at me!" Gen snaps. "You didn't want to do it in YOUR house because you didn't want anyone to do anything for your stuff. I took the liberty of making sure things would stay in control."

"NO, YOU DIDN'T."

"No. I made sure that there weren't any explosives within the perimeters."

Zim scowls.

Gen grins. "Well, anyway, tonight's duel is ZIM VS PURPLE! But first, Dib is gonna-"

Dib is lying flat on his face on the floor.

GIR pokes Dib.

Tak cocks her head. "Is he dead?"

"I dunno…" GIR replies.

"UGH." Tsuki groans. "Just hit him with the ESoP or something."

Gaz rolls her eyes. "The tall purple freak swallowed it last chapter, remember?"

…

"How exactly did that happen?" Red asks warily.

"I honestly have no idea and do not want to know." Gen says, shaking her head. "Hit Dib with the ES(IoP)oP!"

"ZIM CANNOT STAND ANYMORE ACROBATS!"

"They're called acronyms, not acroba-"

"SILENCE!"

Tsuki slaps Zim in the face. "BE QUIET! So, what does the newest extremely stupid acronym stand for?"

"Electric Swordfish (Inside of Purple) of Pain."

"FAIL."

Red grabs Purple and slams him onto Dib's head.

"OW!"

While Purple tries to massage his face, Dib does nothing but moan.

"Aw, c'mon, Dib. You're supposed to eat a forty-pound burrito for tonight's chapter."

Dib slowly lifts his head up. "Too…tired…"

"Tired?"

"Was up… all night… trying…to… create…presentation… of…Zim… alien…proof… nine days…in…row…ugh…"

Gen and Tsuki exchange excited, slightly psychopathic grins. "Looks like you need… GEN AND TSUKI'S SUPER HYPER ENERGY DRINK OF DOOM!" they say in unison.

As Gen runs downstairs to get the ingredients, Tsuki smiles and explains. "Last year, Gen and I had a sleepover. We were REEAALLLY sugar-hyper and decided to make an energy drink. With careful selections, we found the perfect recipe for a drink that would keep the most tired soul awake. Dib, with this, you'll be able to stay awake just fine, you imbecile!"

"No…side effects…and…stuff?" Dib slurs, half-asleep.

Gen runs into the room carrying miscellaneous items. "Got it!"

Tsuki grabs a blender and sets it on the dresser. Each time she calls for an ingredient, Gen passes it to her.

"Chocolate bubblegum Suk Munkey?"

"Check."

"Five pounds of sugar?"

"Check."

"Espresso black coffee?"

"Check."

"Mountain Dew, extra caffeine?"

"Check."

"Syrup?"

"Check."

"Monster energy drinks?"

"Check."

"Chili peppers?"

"Check."

"GIR plushie?"

"Check."

"Hilarious Truth or Dare fanfiction printouts?"

"Check."

"Jumper cables?"

"Check."

"Cactus juice?"

"Check."

"Crazy person soup?"

"Check."

"Raw electricity?"

"Check."

"And finally, fifteen sticks of dynamite?"

"Check!"

Tsuki presses the puree button on the blender. In the end, she pours the oddly rainbow-colored (if that is possible, which it isn't) slushie-like liquid into a cup and passes it to Dib. "Drink up."

Dib, too tired to notice what they put in the drink, raises it to his lips.

.2 SECONDS LATER…

"HIGUYS WOWIFEELGREAT WHYAREWE INGEN'SROOM HEHEHEHEH IIIIIII LIIIKKKEE CHEEESSEE! HEYDIDYOUKNOW ZIM'SANALIEN? I'MEXCITEDHEY THISISREALLYFUN ICANFLYLIKEA BIIIIIRD! WHATAREHOTDOGS MADEOF ANDNOOOOOOOO THE WAFFLENINJASARE AFTERMYSOUP NOOOOOOONOTMY SOUPTHEREWAS BACONINMYSOAP ILIKEBACON A LOT BECAUSEIFEEL REALLY HYPPPERRRRR!" Dib screams as he runs on the ceiling.

The Tallest faint. Wimps.

"Did you ever test that stuff?" Gaz asks.

"Yes."

"And what happened?" Zim asks warily.

"Pretty much this."

"AND YOU STILL USED IT?"

"YES."

"WHY?"

"BECAUSE HE WAS REALLY TIRED AND IT'D BE FUNNY! GOSH, PEOPLE? WHY MUST OUR MOTIVES ALWAYS BE QUESTIONED?"

Tak glances up. "Can you at least get him down?"

"I dunno…" Tsuki mumbles. "Maybe. But we'll need either a lot of nuclear weapons or someone reeeeallly stupid."

FIFTEEN SECONDS LATER…

Zim is perched on top of Gen's ceiling fan, trying to poke Dib with a long metal pole.

"And your plan is…?"

"DO NOT QUESTION ZIM! AGH! GET OVER HERE!"

"IDON'TWANNA! ISEESTARS! WOOOOOOOOO!1!"

"I SAID GET OVER HERE!"

"NOOOOOOOOO! YOU'REANALIEN! ALIENALIENALIEN ALIENALIENALIEN ALIENALIEN AAALLIIIEEENN! WEEHEEHEE HEE YEEEEAAHH!"

Gaz stamps her foot impatiently. "If the whole point of us being here is to sing ridiculous songs, than let's hurry up and get it over with."

Tsuki looks around. "Well, since Zim is currently being an idiot, Purple, you're up first."

"IWANNA SIIIING! IWANNA SIIIIIIING!"

"NO! CALM DOWN ALREADY! PURPLE! GET UP THERE!"

Purple reluctantly picks up the MoD

"_Ooooohhhh, doughnuts!_

_Doughnuts doughnuts doughnuts!  
>The tastiest food of them allll!<br>Round with a hole,  
>I can't control<br>Myself when I eat DOUGHNUTS!_

_Oooooohhhh, doughnuts!_

_No matter what I go through  
>I'll always be with you<br>My doughnuts and meeee  
>My doughnuts and meeee!<em>

_Oooooohhhh, doughnuts!_

_Doughnuts doughnuts doughnuts  
>So yummy and sweet<br>I love you, I said  
>YOU DON'T GET ANY, RED!<br>Yes, I love my DOUGHNUTS!_

_Oooooohhhh, doughnuts!_

_No matter what I go through  
>I'll always be with you<br>My doughnuts and meeee  
>My doughnuts and meeee!<em>

_Oooooohhhh, doughnuts!_

(The music suddenly turns to hard metallic rock)

_OOH! OOH! OOH!  
>DOOOUUGGHNUTS!<br>CAN'T STOP THIS TALLEST!  
>WOO!<br>DOUGHNUTS! DOUGHNUTS!  
>I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!<br>WOO! SO GOOD!  
>YEOW!<em>

(The music turns back to normal)

_No matter what I go through  
>I'll always be with you<br>My doughnuts and meeee  
>My doughnuts and meeee!"<em>

APPLAUSE?

…

…

…

…

…

…

"Well, that song probably wasn't hard to write."

"HEY!"

"WOO! ILIKE DOUGHNUTSTOO! WANNAKNOWWHY? THEY'REFULLOF SUGARRRRR! ILIKESUGAR! HEYSOMEBODY GETMESOME SUGGGAARRRR!"

"NO!" Tak snaps up at Dib. "THE LAST THING YOU NEED IS MORE SUGAR!"

Dib proceeds to laugh like a maniac.

Tsuki and Gen scrutinize the energy drink. "You think we used enough espresso and sugar?" Gen asks.

"Probably…"

"JUST FIX HIM!" Zim screams. Dib grabs the long metal pole and swings Zim around extremely fast.

Zim's screams are ignored.

Tsuki claps her hands together. "Alright, moving on."

"AHHAHAHAHA!"

"CAN IT, BIG HEAD!"

"MYHEAD'S NOTBIGHOW MANYTIMESDO IHAVETOTELL YOUPEOPLE- DUDELOOKI SEEALAMP ILIKELAMPS! LAMPSMAKEME HAPPY! WOOOOOOOO!"

Zim falls flat on his face on the floor. "GIR…?"

GIR skips over. "Yeeessss?"

"...Never drink the energy drink."

GIR begins to run om the ceiling with Dib.

Tsuki looks around. "So…now what're we gonna do?"

Gen waves her hand around.

"WE'RE NOT READING DEPRESSNG ONESHOT SONGFICS."

Gen puts her hand down.

The Tallest are bent over a laptop.

"HURRY UP! YOU ONLY HAVE TWENTY SECONDS TO COMPLETE THE LEVEL!"

"I'M TRYING! I'M TRYING!"

"YOU'RE GONNA LOSE!"

"NO NO NO WAIT! I CAN DO THIS!"

"YES! YES! YE-"

"**GAME OVER. EPIC FAIL.**"

"…Told you."

"SHUT UP!"

"…What are you doing?"

Purple grunts. "Playing some stupid game."

Tsuki shrugs. "You guys really didn't have to tell us. We already know that you two are failures and rejects of life whose only joy comes from height, which you can't control, and bossing people around because of that height. Oh, don't forget eating piles of junk food that will go straight to your thighs and then you'll need to buy new man skirt-apron things or whatever those are."

"THIS IS THE BEST IRKEN BATTLE ARMOR IN EXISTENCE!"

Gen giggles. "Maybe Irkens have a problem with gender-specific clothing. I mean, the basic soldier uniform is _pink_, for crying out loud!"

"ZIMWEARSPINK! ZIMWEARSPINK! ZIMWEARS PIIIII-IIII-IIII-IIINK!"

"Speaking of Zim, where did he go?"

Noises are heard coming from below them. Gen bolts downstairs.

Three minutes later, Gen re-enters the room, dragging Zim by the collar. "WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT RAIDING MY FRIDGE BEFORE WE STARTED? I'd get you anything you needed, so WHY WOULD YOU GO IN THERE AND EAT THE LAST CUPCAKE?"

"ILIKE CUPCAKESCAN IHAVEONEEEE?"

"NO. No more sugar for thou."

"Besides, the _kitanai_ Irken here ate the last one," Gen growls.

"YOU ATTACKED THE MIGHTY ZIM'S FACE WITH A SACK OF GUMMY BEARS? AGAIN?"

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO GO THROUGH THE FRIDGE! AND IF MY LITTLE BROTHER FINDS OUT THAT YOU DRANK THE REST OF HIS SODA, HE'LL BLAME ME AND HE'LL TRY TO BEAT ME WITH A SACK OF HAMBURGER MEAT."

…

Tsuki leans to Zim's ear. "Now would be a good time to sing and change the subject."

Zim runs to grab the MoD.

"_The sun lights up a cloudy sky  
>It's the worst kind of day and I'll tell you why<br>Without fail, every single time  
>That dreary gray haze always seems to signify<em>

_The falling missiles that make me sick  
>I roll my eyes and sigh because it is<em>

_The kind of day that I hate most  
>Someday I swear I'll fall comatose<br>That torrent of horrible acid  
>My skin crawls whenever I see it<br>Some think it's a beautiful thing  
>But I really, really, really hate the rain<em>

_Walking to school, trying to escape  
>Those tiny drops of liquid that cause me so much pain<br>It's freezing cold and yet it burns  
>The hideous drop make my organs churn<em>

_The falling missiles that make me sick  
>I roll my eyes and sigh because it is<em>

_The kind of day that I hate most  
>Someday I swear I'll fall comatose<br>That torrent of horrible acid  
>My skin crawls whenever I see it<br>Some think it's a beautiful thing  
>But I really, really, really hate the rain<em>

_And the only way to  
>Stop the water from burning through<em>

_IS A STINKING, DISGUSTING COAT OF GLUE!_

_It's the kind of day that I hate most  
>Someday I swear I'll fall comatose<br>That torrent of horrible acid  
>My skin crawls whenever I see it<br>Some think it's a beautiful thing  
>But I really, really, really hate the rain<em>

_It's the kind of day that I hate most  
>Someday I swear I'll fall comatose<br>That torrent of horrible acid  
>My skin crawls whenever I see it<br>Some think it's a beautiful thing  
>But I really, really, really hate the rain<em>

_So tell me, is there a way  
>To blow up all this rain?<em>"

APPLAUSE!

"DOESANYONE ELSETHINKIT'S REALLYFUNNY HOWHEGETS BURNEDBY WATER? IMEANIT'S JUSTALITTLE WATERANDHE SCREAMSLIKEA BANSHEE WHENEVERIT TOUCHESHIS SKIN-HEYCAN SOMEONEGET MESOMENOODLES?"

"Just ignore him."

"WHYDOYOU PEOPLENEVER LISTENTOME?"

"Probably because you're currently hyped up on energy drink."

Dib doesn't even notice Gaz's last statement, as he has resumed laughing and howling like a maniac.

Tsuki rolls her eyes. "Can we just vote already?"

COMMENCE THE VOTIFICATION!

"Alright," Tsuki announces. "Tonight, we have a special guest. Please welcome… LEI!"

An Irken with lightning-bolt shaped antennae and yellow eyes enters the room.

"HOW DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP FINDING MY HOUSE?" Gen screams.

"THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT NOW!" Tsuki shouts.

"Okay, let's get this party started!" Lei says. "Tonight-"

"Technically it's morning."

"TONIGHT we've heard Purple singing 'My Doughnuts and Me' and Zim singing 'I Really Hate the Rain'. You've voted, and tonight your winner is… ZIM!"

"I AM ZIM!"

"OH MY GOSH!" Tsuki shrieks. "NONE OF US EVER KNEW THAT BEFORE!"

"HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW? I AM ZIM!"

"You do realize that she was just mocking you."

"NO ONE MOCKS ZIM!"

"…Oh, you poor, poor, idiot. You're glad you fans love you and-hey, where's Dib?"

Dib is out cold on the floor.

"I thought he was all energy-drink crazy," Tak says, confused.

Tsuki grins. "Well, whenever someone goes on a sugar rush, they crash afterward. After all, all that energy has to go somewhere."

GIR is still running on the ceiling.

"Except, of course, in the case of GIR."

Gen's door swings open. "HELLOOOOO!" screams her little brother.

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"

They begin to battle with sacks of gummy bears and hamburger meat.

"CLOSE US OUT, LITTLE BRO!"

"MMMEEEEAAT!"

* * *

><p><strong>*sigh* I drew a picture of crazy, energy-drink-hyper Dib, and it's one of the best Dib pics I've ever drawn.<strong>

**REVIEW!**


	24. Live From the Desert!

**AGGGHHH. WHY CAN'T I JUST UPDATE FAST? Anyway, here is chapter 24. But first, a few announcements:**

**1. I got a deviantART account since last chapter. I've got some Invader Zim fanart, as well as some OC pictures (GEN AND TSUKI INCLUDED), so if you want to check 'em out, the URL to my account can be found in my bio on this site.**

**2. Okay, guys, I'm sorry, but please stop sending in song requests or other requests. This wasn't intended to be a user-participation story, and I'm not even using copyrighted songs anymore! If you want, you can PM me if you want an OC to be a special guest, or if you have a song YOU WROTE that you want me to use, but PLEASE don't send in dares or copyrighted requests. Please?**

**3. I still have other stuff to write, and my time to work on this stuff can be limited. How about I try to update this at least once a month? That way you get quicker updates then I've been providing as of late, and I can feel like I'm actually working. :)**

**ON WITH THE MADNESS!**

* * *

><p>"Hello, and welcome back to IZSC!" cheers Gen.<p>

"AKA, welcome back to IZSC after another FOUR STUPID MONTHS OF HIATUS BECAUSE OUR AUTHOR CAN'T PRIORITIZE," Tsuki says bitterly.

Dib pushes Gen over as he runs away from a rattlesnake, screaming. "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE HERE?"

"OW."

"Oh, right." Tsuki clears her throat. "Due to our studio still being under maintenance, and by that I mean getting un-exploded, we are coming at you live from the Sonoran Desert in Arizona."

"This place is worse than your FILTHY studio," Zim says.

"Hey, at least there isn't any rain."

"Yeah, but there's still sunburn." Dib comments. The rattlesnake has moved on to a target with a smaller head (Purple). "Wait, do aliens get sunburn?"

"I dunno."

"But you're an alien. Shouldn't you know if you-"

"SILENCE!"

"Speaking of sunburn," Gen says. "The only bad thing about doing the fic here today is that our new guest can't be here."

"It's a good thing he's not here," Tsuki mutters. "He's irritating. Worse than all you people."

"Aw, you're just upset because he li-"

"CAN IT."

"And why exactly can't your next stupid person be here?" Red asks.

"Like I said. Sunburn. REALLY BAD SUNBURN."

"Okayyy…"

GIR falls out of the sky and lands on Zim's head, holding a scorpion. "Master! Look what I found!"

"GIR, what is that…thing?"

"I dunno," the robot replies. The scorpion tries to sting him, but it doesn't work. After all, he's made of metal. "But he's so cute! Look! He likes me!"

Zim rolls his eyes and walks away.

"What's the duel for tonight?" Tak asks, bored. "The sooner we get out of here, the better."

"Oh, right. Sorry. Got preoccupied watching the rattlesnake attack Purple. Anyway, tonight is a duet battle. We've got the Tallest up against Zim and Dib," Tsuki says flatly.

"WHY DO ZIM AND I ALWAYS HAVE TO GO TOGETHER?"

"BECAUSE ZADF KICKS BUTT!" Gen shouts. "AND BECAUSE WE SAY SO!"

"Alright. Purple, Red, you two are up first," Tsuki says.

"HEYHEYHEY wait," Purple says. "Don't you usually have more pointless banter before we start poisoning everyone's ears?"

"Okay. If you want to stall, I can just shove a bunch of scorpions down your manskirt thing and watch the fun."

"I'll grab the microphone."

"Please do."

The Tallest take the stage-

"WE HAVE NO STAGE."

"Oh, right. Thanks for pointing that out, Dibequador."

…

"What did you just- never mind. I don't wanna know."

"Well," Gen mutters. "Now we need a stage."

"Use the back of a javelina," Gaz says.

"NO."

"What on your pitiful planet is a hav-ell-ee-nah?" Zim asks.

"A javelina is a potentially dangerous pig-like creature that lives in this desert, also known as a peccary. Messing with them is not a good idea, therefore a member of that species would not be an optimal stage substitute."

"FILTHY EARTH PIGS."

"Exactly."

"Or we could use Dib's head. It's big enough," Tsuki suggests.

"MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!"

"DENIALLLLLL!"

"Or a cactus."

"TAK. NOT HELPING. But that would be pretty funny…"

"Why do we even need a stage? Can't they just sing on the ground?"

"NO, LARD NAR," Gen snaps. "There is a certain science behind performing on a stage. TELL 'EM, MEMBRANE."

Professor Membrane brings out a giant white board covered in countless mathematical equations and diagrams. "Thank you, peculiar child. Now, the necessity of performers showcasing their abilities on a stage all relates to…"

* * *

><p>WE NOW INTERRUPT THE INVADER ZIM SINGING CHALLENGE FOR THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK.<p>

_ Have you ever gotten tired of actually working for a living? Do you wish there was some other way to do your chores than actually __**doing**__ them? Well, look no further, thanks to the CLONE-O-MATIC!_

_ The CLONE-O-MATIC allows you to instantly generate clones f yourself! Just insert a small amount of DNA, press "START," and you'll have a clone of yourself before you can say supercalifragilistic expialidocious! These clones can do your chores, go to the office for you, or even do your taxes! Make as many clones as you need to get the job done! Order today, and have a completely willing servant!*_

_*Please not that clones may develop free will and not listen to a word you say, choosing rather to steal your identity or something like that._

NOW BACK TO THE FANFIC!

* * *

><p>THREE HOURS LATER…<p>

"…And THAT, children, is why a stage is required to put on a performance."

By this point, everyone has fallen asleep, except for the Irkens, who are simply sitting there wishing they COULD sleep. Finally, people begin to open their eyes. "Ughh… Well, now what?" Tak moans.

"Let's just use that rock over there."

"Fine."

"TALLEST, GET YOUR MANSKIRTS UP THERE AND SING."

**Red** and _Purple_ grouchily climb onto the rock and begin.

"**Far from where you are  
>Out there with the stars<br>We are in control  
>In a place where tall guys rule<strong>

_Complete and utter domination  
>Conquering you smelly abominations<br>We are in control  
>Where we mark out the protocol<em>

**You better listen up  
>And do as we say<br>**_Hurry up and get our snacks  
>'Cause we don't got all day!<em>

We're the bosses  
>Say it now, loud and clear<br>We are the bosses  
>Show us that you hear<p>

We are the bosses  
>We'll rule the whole universe someday<br>We are the bosses  
>So you'd better OBEY!<p>

_You better know exactly who we are  
>Or you'll go flying out the airlock who knows how far<br>We are in control  
>Intimidating and really tall<em>

**There better not be a complaint from you  
>You think you could rule better than we do?<br>We are in control  
>So the answer to your question would be a 'no.'<strong>

**You better listen up  
>And do as we say<br>**_Hurry up and get our snacks  
>'Cause we don't got all day!<em>

We're the bosses  
>Say it now, loud and clear<br>We are the bosses  
>Show us that you hear<p>

We are the bosses  
>We'll rule the whole universe someday<br>We are the bosses  
>So you'd better OBEY!<p>

We are the bosses!  
>We are the bosses!<br>We are the bosses!  
>We are the bosses!<p>

**You better listen up  
>And do as we say<br>**_Hurry up and get our snacks  
>'Cause we don't got all day!<em>

We're the bosses  
>Say it now, loud and clear<br>We are the bosses  
>Show us that you hear<p>

We are the bosses  
>We'll rule the whole universe someday<br>We are the bosses  
>So you'd better OBEY!<p>

OBEY!"

APPLAUSE

"WOOOOOOOO!"

"Zim, sucking up to them isn't gonna get you anywhere," Tsuki says with an eye roll.

"Eh? I was only complimenting their skill."

"So…you actually thought that was good?"

"Of course! Only a complete FOOL would dare insult that performance!"

Tsuki facepalms and turns around.

"Hey…where's GIR?" Gen asks.

"That question is never a good sign."

"True that."

"So, where is he?" Dib says, looking around. GIR is nowhere in sight.

Zim sighs. "Let's just look for him. The sooner we find him, the less trouble he'll get us into…"

Everyone looks around for GIR. Gen and Tsuki scan the extremely thorny bushes and run away screaming at the sight of a rattlesnake. MiMi uses an X-ray scan. Dib looks behind several cactus, which proves to be a stupid idea as Gaz repeatedly shoves him into them. Ouch. Zim stomps around screaming GIR's name and various threats. Tak sits on the rock-stage because she honestly couldn't care less. The Tallest just eat snacks like the lazy fools they are.

"THAT'S IT!" shouts Dib after being shoved into a cactus for the twenty-third time. "Zim, find your stupid robot so we can GET OUT OF HERE!"

"SILENCE, DIB-STINK!"

"Y'know what?" Gen says. 'I'm starting to think of us as one big dysfunctional family."

"We are NOT a family. And if we were, you'd be the irritating distant cousin who no one likes."

"…That was mean, Tak…"

"Thank you."

"Let's just look for GIR later and let the other two morons sing," Tsuki says. "I'm getting bored."

"Okay. ZIM, DIBEQUADOR, GET ON THE STAGE."

**Zim** and _Dib_ drag themselves onstage.

"_Okay, how are we gonna start this thing?_

**You didn't write it yet?**

_We didn't know they'd make us do this today. And why do I have to be the one to write it?_

**I don't like to waste my time writing stupid songs of…stupidness!**

_Well, what are we gonna-"_

"HEY!' Tsuki hollers. "YOU HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED SINGING YET. WE GET THAT YOU'RE BOTH IDIOTS, SO JUST MAKE SOMETHING UP SO THAT WE CAN GET ON WITH OUR LIVES!"

"…_Fine._

**Filthy human.**

_Here we go…um-_

_Only a short distance down the street  
>Lives something from another world<br>A horrible monster  
>Who wants to take us over-<em>

**AND IN A STUPID HOUSE  
>IS A STUPID HUMAN<br>WITH A STUPIDLY LARGE HEAD  
>THAT IS STUPID.<strong>

_Oh, real mature._

_An extraterrestrial idiot  
>Just doesn't know when to quit<br>Just can't seem to get a grip  
>On the fact that I'll always win<em>

**NO, YOU WON'T!**

**The Dib monkey is just another one of those filthy stinking humans  
>Who stink and have no idea of<br>Just how doomed they are.**

_YOU'RE NOT GONNA WIN!_

**YES, I WILL! AND YOUR ENTIRE SPECIES WILL FEEL MY WRATH!**

_NOT BEFORE I HAVE YOU ON AN AUTOPSY TABLE!_

**LARGE HEAD!**

_SPACE SCUM!_

**DOOKIE ARMS!**

_ALIEN TRASH!_

**FILTHY WORM!**

_STUPID SPINE!_

**INFERIOR-**"

"SHUT! UP!" screams Tsuki. "I think we've heard enough from you two. NOW GET OFF THE STAGE."

Zim and Dib are too caught up in their shouting match to notice.

"Let's just leave 'em up there while we vote," Gen says.

"But GIR has a vote, and we can't find him."

"We all know he never actually puts a performer's name down. He doesn't have the attention span for that. I love the little guy, but the heat is starting to get to me."

"Fair enough. Alright, people, even though BOTH of today's duets were horrible and make me want to vomit, try to decide on who you hated least. LET'S VOTE!

They all vote. We've been through this before.

Tsuki grabs the envelope and pushes Zim and Dib off the stage.

"OW!"

"Watch where you're dragging your filthy meat, worm pig!"

"Nah, I prefer not to," Tsuki says with a shrug. "So, we've heard the Tallest singing 'We Are the Bosses' and Zim and Dib singing…whatever they were doing up there. Our winners are…RED AND PURPLE!"

The Tallest cheer and whoop in victory. A voice rings out, saying, "I FOUND GIR!"

"WHO SAID THAT?"

Ren smiles and steps out from behind a cactus. "Hello!"

"What are _you_ doing here?" Dib asks.

"Yeah, and where's Zacky-kins?" chimes in Gen.

"Running from a pack of coyotes."

"Why-"

"I wanted to try a new tactic."

"…Ah."

Zim pushes his way through the others. "Who cares what these stupid monkeys are doing? Where's GIR?"

Ren points behind a bush. "Over there."

GIR merrily pops out of the bush, holding something that thrashes around in his arms. "Hi! I found a new friend!"

"GIR, we don't have time for- What is that thing?"

"It's a piggy!"

Dib inspects the pig. "Weird…Since when did pigs have that much hair…?"

"THAT'S A JAVELINA!"

And so, everyone runs away screaming as the aggravated javelina wriggles out of GIR's arms and gives chase. Oh, and there were more nearby. They tend to travel in groups. Uh-oh.

* * *

><p><strong>Javelinas are real.<strong>

**Anyhow, next chapter the studio WILL be fixed, and you'll see that new character that was mentioned... Who are they? Why does Tsuki seem to hate them with all of her soul? You'll see next time! Until then, please R&R, and feel free to check out whatever other stories I've written to occupy myself. :)**


End file.
